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School Counselling

Today I took a major step in regards to doing something I wouldn't usually do because of my anxiety.

I spoke to my head of year about dropping a subject that causes me a great deal of stress and anxiety so I can focus on other subjects for my A levels. However, it didn't really go as planned, considering the fact many of my friends had dropped their 4th subjects I didn't think it would be a problem for me but my head of year seems to feel the need to highly discourage my choice.

She thinks I should keep on my 4th subject because I got good grades in that subject last year but things were much easier then as well, these days I don't even want to go into school due to having to go into this lesson and dealing with the huge adrenaline rush cause of my anxiety, then having to quickly find a coping method so I don't look like an idiot for having a panic attack.

My head of year thinks I should go speak with the school nurture lady whose supposed to support us through talk therapy but I've already been to her 3 or 4 times before for weeks on end and it doesn't help, talk therapy is so draining and then I have to sit through the rest of the school day pretending like I'm not suffocating in my own head (does that make sense?)

My head of year has seen me struggling with anxiety for years now and I hate how she thinks that doing a bit of talk therapy will miraculously make this all better and I'll suddenly be able to ace this exam. She acts like she knows me but she has no idea what I've been through and what I'm still going through, she told me that she thinks I don't realise how strong I am but the thing is I do realise and this is why I also know that I need a break from this lesson so I don't spiral through the rest of this year.

Elizabeth

Comments

  • ElizabethElizabeth Posts: 92 Budding Regular
    Hi, I understand you are going through a hard time. I think you are really strong to be making this decision. I did my A-Levels last year and I dropped down to 3 subjects, it's a hard decision to make although most universities only require 3 so I thought it was best to try my hardest and focus on what I needed for uni. You need to remember to put yourself first, and do what you think is best. I'm sorry that she wasn't supportive of your decision, is there anyone else you could talk to about it?  <3

    Sorry that I'm not much help. But if you ever want to talk I'm here  <3
    Ria200330
  • MaisyMaisy The Mix convert CymruPosts: 278 Moderator

    Hi there,

     

    Even though it’s been a while since I did a-levels, I remember the stress quite well and I dropped a subject too.

     

    Unfortunately, sometimes teachers tend to think more about the grades and how good it would be if you can get into a good university with 4 a-levels as opposed to your mental health and that dropping to 3 might be more beneficial to you. It seems like you struggle with a lot of anxiety not even wanting to go into school due to this lesson, and then trying to cope so that you don’t have a panic attack. It must make learning difficult in that lesson when you are feeling so anxious! Is there a particular reason you get anxious with this lesson?

     

    I’m sorry to hear that you don’t find the talk therapy with the school nurture lady helpful. Talk therapy often depends on the right fit between therapist and client, so while you didn’t find talk therapy with the school nurture lady helpful, it doesn’t mean talk therapy won’t work for you at all. Although, I agree, having a session of talk therapy, and then trying to pay attention in school afterwards must be very difficult and perhaps even a bit counterproductive!

     

    It is difficult when you are good at the subject and have been strong for dealing with anxiety for such a long time. Understandably, the teachers seeing your grades would want you to continue, but equally, your mental health and wellbeing matters too, perhaps even more so.  If one subject causes you so much stress, it’s natural that you’d want to drop it to focus on the other subjects. And not only that, but overall you may be feeling more stressed if you have to stick with the subject, which isn’t fair on you either. I’m wondering what the teacher of the subject you want to drop thinks? Maybe they can shed some light on what you’ll be studying this year and their opinion on whether you should keep or drop the subject?

     

    If you don’t think you’d regret dropping the subject, and you don’t need it for your options after school e.g. university, then it might be worth talking to someone else at school, perhaps the head of department or someone in a more senior position than the head of year. Maybe you could also talk to your parents and see if they could advocate for you too?

     

    Let us know how you get on <3


  • ShaunieShaunie England 🏠Posts: 9,680 Supreme Poster
    Heyy

    its actually such a positive to be able to make those chioces for youre self and not be much influeinced by others. Its really good skill to have in recovery of knowing what would and wouldnt help you and that indepandant chioce. Its a shame not being respected. 
    She should empower your indepance and decision making

    She doesnt sound very understanding for you and probably cares more about the grades to be honest. Sometimes we have to do what we want and its not like would let anyone down or anything. wht you think its best cause it is your future and what you want. counselling can help others and sometimes it just doesnt help other people, depending on the person and their head space at the time so its all up to you. 
    Take care <3
    if you have the strength to sustain anorexia you have the strength to overcome it
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