Scared of regretting my university decision

Former Member

I have applied to university in September and have firmed an offer from a university four hours away, I am scared that I may have made the wrong choice. This particular university is not car friendly meaning I would have to travel to and from by train, a six hour train journey worth £80 with four changes. I have been in a relationship for 2 years now and am really worried about how it is going to work. I have been dealing with loneliness and well-being issues for a while now which I have recently sought help for, my boyfriend has been the most supportive person, so much more so than my parents, and has supported my decision completely. He has helped me so much recently and whenever I feel down he is there to comfort me. I am worried that moving so far away and being so inaccessible will take a toll on my mental health. I am scared that I might not make any close friends who I feel comfortable talking about my emotions and well-being with and I will feel lonely so far away from my boyfriend with nobody to comfort me. I chose the university because I fell in love with the location and I felt I needed a fresh start, things have gotten quite bad at home and I have drifted apart from my local friends, for no particular reason other than lack of common interest. Has anyone been in a similar situation / have any advice for me? Even just a friendly message would help, thank you

[Deleted User]

It might not be too late to back out from your university application. After all, I'm sure the uni staff would be understanding and you'd probably not be the only entrant who needs to do so. I suggest you have a talk with your boyfriend. Paying out £80 with four train changes isn't the greatest, I'll agree, especially as the place is not car-friendly. I'm sure though despite the place being situated in a beauty spot that there may well be other universities to choose from? You could get advice from your boyfriend. It's always good to have a second opinion.

Also, many students take a gap year. Maybe having this year to think about things would be a good opportunity when you need it most, and being with your boyfriend who has remained loyally close by you will help bolster your self-esteem at such a critical time.

Mandy :wave:

Azziman

Elisha22 wrote: »

I have applied to university in September and have firmed an offer from a university four hours away, I am scared that I may have made the wrong choice. This particular university is not car friendly meaning I would have to travel to and from by train, a six hour train journey worth £80 with four changes. I have been in a relationship for 2 years now and am really worried about how it is going to work. I have been dealing with loneliness and well-being issues for a while now which I have recently sought help for, my boyfriend has been the most supportive person, so much more so than my parents, and has supported my decision completely. He has helped me so much recently and whenever I feel down he is there to comfort me. I am worried that moving so far away and being so inaccessible will take a toll on my mental health. I am scared that I might not make any close friends who I feel comfortable talking about my emotions and well-being with and I will feel lonely so far away from my boyfriend with nobody to comfort me. I chose the university because I fell in love with the location and I felt I needed a fresh start, things have gotten quite bad at home and I have drifted apart from my local friends, for no particular reason other than lack of common interest. Has anyone been in a similar situation / have any advice for me? Even just a friendly message would help, thank you

Hi Elisha22,

I'm also attending university this year, so I'm in the same boat! For many people, moving away from home is part of "the university experience", and it can be a scary thought. You certainly won't be the only one feeling this way when you get there - many people have some concerns or worries when they start university!

I'll assume that you're staying in halls, so you won't be commuting up and down very often. But if you book train tickets online well in advance, the ticket price will probably drop, and I think you get extra discounts for being a student (?).

But you won't be alone - you'll meet a lot of people at events during Freshers week (key tip: sign up to, or at least show interest in, lots of different societies - it's a easy way to meet lots of people!), or in your classes.

As for access, you're still able to call your parents and partner through Whatsapp/Skype/FaceTime - it's not a direct replacement, but you're able to keep in touch with them that way.

I think that these concerns are quite normal, so you don't need to feel out of place for having these thoughts. I think you'll cope with it much better than you think you can!x

Much love