Home Health & Wellbeing
If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Read the community guidelines before posting ✨

*Sigh*

Former MemberFormer Member Owl WhispererPosts: 1,020 Wise Owl
I love my name 'Belle', it's what my friends and closest, loveliest family call me and the name Mirabelle was given by my late parents who named me after a plum. It's a specialty of the French region of Lorraine, either made into delectable jam, or eau de vie. As I adore both, that was how my loved ones came to call me. So far, all good. Except the other half of my family are an insufferable bunch of notorious aristocrats and worse, are descending upon us in the latter part of next week. They are uninvited, inquistive and elitist. They have no right to invade my little place of peace and calm. How do I refuse them without being uncivil?

Comments

  • AzzimanAzziman Moderator, Community Champion Posts: 2,103 Boards Champion
    Hi Mirabelle,

    Speak to your family, or whoever invited them. Tell them how these people make you feel, and why you don't like them. Remember to use evidence of previous actions/speech, otherwise you're less likely to succeed.

    On the one hand, it would be quite rude to rescind an invitation. You might be resolving your issue with them this way, but the impact on the rest of your family will be quite bad, I'd imagine. On the other hand, your family obviously don't want any kind of conflict happening. The pleasant middle ground is that they come this time, and don't come any more. Or, if your family does decide to invite them, they firstly make sure you have plans to be elsewhere with friends at that time.

    Much love <3
    FAQ | How to report a post | How to report spam
    I'm a community moderator. I'm here to help guide discussions and make sure Community Guidelines are followed. I can't send DMs, but you can message @TheMix or email community@themix.org.uk with questions or concerns.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Owl Whisperer Posts: 1,020 Wise Owl
    Hello @Azziman I'm so pleased to see you. :)

    The problem has been sorted since aunty got my close family friend Laura to help. I'll be home and rested after our St Valentine's concert in London on the 14th, doubtless being too exhausted for going on to Spain for the rest of the tour that Jules is leading. I'm in the middle of antibiotics for a nasty sinus infection, but have to rest up so I can get well quicker. I'd have cancelled London, but can't get out of the Valentine's concert since I'm under contract and will be leading our band instead of Jules.

    Aunty guilty admitted of being persuaded by the wild bunch because they'll be in London for our concert with VIP tickets. She could hardly refuse. Among this riotous bunch are a pair of enfants terribles renowned for their disgusting cocaine weekends and they are not going to get away with it at my country house because Laura worked for this company, https://www.ciprotect.com/ We only call up when having a serious problem. Clark International are very thorough.

    At one time I wouldn't have had a problem refusing, for a few months ago I used to be abrasive. Now, I have changed to become a gentle person, though vulnerable. Last night I was in a terrible state dreading this bunch of society horrors, but keeping my worry hidden from Jules because she already has enough to deal with. Now I feel much happier knowing that conflict will not be tolerated. Since this morning I've asked aunty to allow me to have a minder from Clark's when she is away on business. Thankfully she's agreed so my sister Mandy and I can be at home and not worry, especially as we have a big responsibility with our owl.

    The other half of my family are so lovely, so different. They are caring and look out for each other. Even though I'm the youngest, they look up to me and though some big decisions come my way every so often, now I feel more able to cope.

    Thank you for your help. I'm so grateful. :)

    Belle x
  • AzzimanAzziman Moderator, Community Champion Posts: 2,103 Boards Champion
    Hi Mirabelle,

    I'm glad to things have worked out for you - you seem much more at ease already!x

    Much love <3
    FAQ | How to report a post | How to report spam
    I'm a community moderator. I'm here to help guide discussions and make sure Community Guidelines are followed. I can't send DMs, but you can message @TheMix or email community@themix.org.uk with questions or concerns.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Owl Whisperer Posts: 1,020 Wise Owl
    Azziman wrote: »
    Hi Mirabelle,

    I'm glad to things have worked out for you - you seem much more at ease already!x

    Much love <3

    Thank you for dropping by. Yes, it feels as if I have got over what happened, but there is an anniversary coming soon and...... already I'm upset. I haven't told anyone here. And I'm not sure if I can. :crying:
  • AzzimanAzziman Moderator, Community Champion Posts: 2,103 Boards Champion
    That's okay - you don't have to tell anyone if you're not comfortable with it. Just know that we're here for you in case you ever do want to talk about it - I'm sure that you'll find your own way of resolving the issue otherwise!x

    Much love <3
    FAQ | How to report a post | How to report spam
    I'm a community moderator. I'm here to help guide discussions and make sure Community Guidelines are followed. I can't send DMs, but you can message @TheMix or email community@themix.org.uk with questions or concerns.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Owl Whisperer Posts: 1,020 Wise Owl
    Azziman wrote: »
    That's okay - you don't have to tell anyone if you're not comfortable with it. Just know that we're here for you in case you ever do want to talk about it - I'm sure that you'll find your own way of resolving the issue otherwise!x

    Much love <3

    I did make a post, Azziman. So many views as is always the case, but at least I managed to find the courage to reach out to the community.

    Thank you for all the support you have given me, and to others. :)

    ~ Belle
  • Former MemberFormer Member Owl Whisperer Posts: 1,020 Wise Owl
    Good news just in is my lawyer had writs served on 'the terrible twins' and their aristocratic parents to STAY AWAY. This means they and their family of tossers are not allowed to see me any more, and if they ever return or come anywhere near me and my young family, they could be jailed.

    I can now live without fear of being stalked, or have nasty letters sent me. It means safety for me and my family, and how wonderful it feels, too. :thumb:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 65 Boards Initiate
    edited September 18
    Hi @Past User. It's great to hear your good news. Thanks for sharing it with us. I can imagine it must feel wonderful to feel safe now. I hope this continues.
    Post edited by TheMix on
  • Former MemberFormer Member Owl Whisperer Posts: 1,020 Wise Owl
    edited September 18
    Mochan wrote: »
    Hi @Past User. It's great to hear your good news. Thanks for sharing it with us. I can imagine it must feel wonderful to feel safe now. I hope this continues.

    Hi @Mochan

    While news is good on my thread here, I am having problems since my band I perform with has got onto social media and our band's manager and staff have been deleting my photos onstage so this has become my next issue. However, my family have drafted in extra security and on the forum here I have been receiving much support and help, also encouragement. Just wanted you to know this and I thank you so much for your ongoing support. :)

    ~ Belle
    Post edited by TheMix on
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 65 Boards Initiate
    edited September 18
    Hi @Past User.

    I'm sorry to hear about the ongoing problems with your band on social media. Have you found a way to bring this up with your band's manager and staff?

    Glad to hear the support has been helpful. I hope you keep us updated on photos being deleted and that this is resolved.
    Post edited by TheMix on
  • Former MemberFormer Member Owl Whisperer Posts: 1,020 Wise Owl
    edited September 18
    Mochan wrote: »
    Hi @Past User.

    I'm sorry to hear about the ongoing problems with your band on social media. Have you found a way to bring this up with your band's manager and staff?

    Glad to hear the support has been helpful. I hope you keep us updated on photos being deleted and that this is resolved.

    Hi @Mochan sorry, but I fell asleep on the sofa! :blush:

    This evening I sent a robust email to my band's manager. She promptly replied, and will be actioning on it first thing tomorrow morning. I'm glad because tomorrow I'm flying out to Majorca for an audition at a major 5 star hotel tomorrow evening, and having another audition, but this time for my band this coming Friday. So I will not want the trouble sis and I experienced yesterday in town.

    Support from @The Mix admins has been tremendous. Even since I first joined the forum, all my troubles have been helped and not only a memory box for my little one, but also a 'feel-good' box I'm making with Mandy my sister for us to enjoy during our down times. This suggestion was brought to me last night and I am truly grateful because already my sister and I have been feeling great. I watch over Mandy. Though she is a year older than me, she has been prone to sleep terrors and memory recalls of the most unpleasant kind, but our aunty who adopted us since our mother died has got Mandy a very good counsellor. And I have been put in contact with a new counsellor to help me start coming to terms with my little one, Harriet.

    I cannot thank you enough, and other moderators who have taken time to come and help me through what has been a truly awful three months, and I am so grateful for your help, too.

    Wishing you all the best, always,

    ~ Belle
    Post edited by TheMix on
  • RayofhopeRayofhope Posts: 152 Helping Hand
    Hi belle,

    I am glad to hear that your manager has made sure that things are ok for you. I hope that all your auditions go well and everything is good with you.

    I am glad that you have found the mix has been really helpful it’s great to hear. It’s great that you and your sister now have the support which you need and I hope you are able to continue this support for when you need it .

    How are you feeling?

    Rayofhope 🌈
    Life doesn’t require we be the best, only that we try our best
  • Former MemberFormer Member Owl Whisperer Posts: 1,020 Wise Owl
    Rayofhope wrote: »
    Hi belle,

    I am glad to hear that your manager has made sure that things are ok for you. I hope that all your auditions go well and everything is good with you.

    I am glad that you have found the mix has been really helpful it’s great to hear. It’s great that you and your sister now have the support which you need and I hope you are able to continue this support for when you need it .

    How are you feeling?

    Rayofhope 🌈

    Hello @Rayofhope

    Nice of you to ask about my auditions, but they were cancelled. Jules was told by the 5 Star hotels near our family home in Alcúdia that their clientelle preferred music from the 1980's and 90's. Also they rejected our fee. The latter is strange because all the other top hotels on the island have had us in 2016 and 2017 and our band had brought the hotels big revenue in their bars. Consequently we went home. However, a very big and sprawling hotel in Can Picafort have booked us for the whole of May - and, they signed our contract and gave us a 25% deposit. This was very welcome news, and as you can imagine both of us were very pleased. :thumb: What secured the deal were hotel references from Madrid, but our band has been long established coming up to 4 years this May and our music is loved and always brings in a crowd.

    Jules came home to stay permanently with me until we fly out in May. I have only seen my darling for a few days at a time. Now we are having 2 whole months togther.

    More good news is we have a permanent violinist. She is very talented. Her playing is simply beautiful, a very welcome addition to make our band up to 6.

    Last evening though I cannot disclose, I had my confidence severely knocked and I was very upset. But I contacted someone who this evening was so kind to me and very supportive, and they believed in me. This support has been wonderful, so perhaps now this dark time I have been going through will finish, and I can step out into a brighter, happier and safer time.

    Mandy my sister has been wonderful, too. Her emotional health has vastly improved, and she looks radiantly pretty. I am very happy for her, our whole family is.

    Thank you so much for asking how I am. I feel great! And I thank you and the staff so much for their wonderful support.

    Wishing you all the best and have a super weekend,

    ~ Belle
  • AzzimanAzziman Moderator, Community Champion Posts: 2,103 Boards Champion
    Hi Belle,

    Glad to hear that things are sorted on the family front, the band is doing well, your sister is feeling better, and that you're feeling happier - that's all great news that we love to hear!x

    Much love <3
    FAQ | How to report a post | How to report spam
    I'm a community moderator. I'm here to help guide discussions and make sure Community Guidelines are followed. I can't send DMs, but you can message @TheMix or email community@themix.org.uk with questions or concerns.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Owl Whisperer Posts: 1,020 Wise Owl
    Azziman wrote: »
    Hi Belle,

    Glad to hear that things are sorted on the family front, the band is doing well, your sister is feeling better, and that you're feeling happier - that's all great news that we love to hear!x

    Much love <3

    Thank you so much @Azziman !

    Finally, things are sorting out and I am much happier in my life and also I have new friend in Julia who I wrote all about in The Belle Diaries in the creative forum.

    I greatly value your support, and I expect many others on the forum do, too. Have a great weekend.

    Love,
    Belle x
Sign In or Register to comment.