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Coursework & expectations

Former MemberFormer Member Carer/musicianPosts: 819 Part of The Mix Family
Sorry to bother you all with this. I am sat here in tears because my family are expecting me to just spend all my time doing English revision and not do any coursework. I have 3 pieces to do, 1 of them i have only just started and i have 12 pages to type in 2 weeks alongside that doing all my essay for the same unit. I have so much to do coursework wise that my mum doesn't understand that I English revision isn't at the top of my priority list right now. My coursework is what gets me a grade in betc not exams and revision. I just wanted the weekend off but that is physically impossible right now. I don't want to be here right now i just want to throw my hard drive and destroy and get rid of all my coursework so people can see how much a failure i am. A carer was never cut out for this, i know it, you probably know it. I just want to curl up somewhere and die so no one can find me and now one can ever say anything about me. I am already a laughing stock at college.

Sorry I will leave you know.

Abi

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 58 Boards Initiate
    Hi Abi,

    There is absolutely no reason to apologise. The stress of having a lot of work gets to all of us sometimes, and this is perfectly natural, so please do not be so hard on yourself.

    You are right to talk about prioritising; with BTECs, coursework is the more important thing to priortise. Have you had a proper conversation with your family about this? It sounds like you might have, but making this really clear will help them understand how schools today work (schools don't always have the best communication with parents :P). It may be helpful to speak to your head of year at school; if they are understanding, then they can help you speak to your family and organise your workload to make it less stressful.

    Either way, you clearly care a lot about getting good work done, so being so mean to yourself definitely won't help. Have you tried taking a break to clear your thoughts before getting back to work? As humans, we are a lot less productive when we haven't had good breaks :D

    Wish the best,
    Seven
  • AzzimanAzziman Moderator, Community Champion Posts: 2,103 Boards Champion
    Hi @Abigail!x

    Don't apologise - it's definitely okay to talk about your feelings! To be perfectly honest, it doesn't matter what your parents think you should do, because they aren't doing the course! You should do what you think is best for your best performance. It would be nice to explain to them why doing things your way are the best, but I appreciate you're strapped for time so it's not a priority.

    In regard to your work, breaking it down into smaller pieces may be helpful. A couple of pages a day, and you've typed the 12 page document within a week. That leaves you a nice cushion of time to do the essay. I don't really know if that would work to be honest, but the idea of breaking it down is what I'm trying to say :D

    You're not a failure. You are cut out for this. You've studied for so long, you've found something you'd like to study, you're working hard and clearly care about your work being great quality, as @Seven said. That's better than many of the students I've come across. I know all this work can be really overwhelming, but don't let it make you forget who you are. You're not some student who's being overcome by work. You're Abigail, a courageous and determined maturing girl that can take on any challenge and smash down barriers! You're much better than you give yourself credit for, so celebrate yourself, because you are capable of doing this, and doing it well!x

    Much love <3
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  • Former MemberFormer Member Moderator Deactivated Posts: 31 Boards Initiate
    Abi

    Hey Abi , Thank you for expressing your feelings and coming to us at The Mix for support. It sounds like you are having a tough time. It may be a good idea to consider discussing any concerns you may have with your English teacher they could advise you on how to balance and organise your work load. Do you feel you can talk to your teacher about your concerns?

    Often many young people go through the nightmare of weighing up what to spend more time on when studying whether its exams or coursework. (Perhaps it could be a good thing if you take some time out away from studying to clear your head this could include doing an activity that you enjoy for example shopping, reading a book, hanging out with friends, eating your favourite goodies.
    It is very brave that you have brought this issue to our attention as frequently many young people can feel like a ‘failure’ or that they are a ‘bother’ for expressing concerns with their studies, however finding a distraction could make you feel more positive, or even talking to your classmates you could possibly organise sessions where you meet up and plan your coursework and planned revision sessions. This could boost your confidence, and decide on your career path.
    It may also be helpful to talk to your career advisor at college as they may often talk to students with similar concerns about studies and career paths.
    You have mentioned ‘you are already a laughing stock at school ‘, what makes you feel this way? Is there any other issues that you may be facing in college, if this is something that you want to further discuss if so you can talk us anytime.

    Esther @TheMix
  • Former MemberFormer Member Carer/musician Posts: 819 Part of The Mix Family
    edited September 18
    Past User wrote: »
    Abi

    Hey Abi , Thank you for expressing your feelings and coming to us at The Mix for support. It sounds like you are having a tough time. It may be a good idea to consider discussing any concerns you may have with your English teacher they could advise you on how to balance and organise your work load. Do you feel you can talk to your teacher about your concerns?

    Often many young people go through the nightmare of weighing up what to spend more time on when studying whether its exams or coursework. (Perhaps it could be a good thing if you take some time out away from studying to clear your head this could include doing an activity that you enjoy for example shopping, reading a book, hanging out with friends, eating your favourite goodies.
    It is very brave that you have brought this issue to our attention as frequently many young people can feel like a &#145;failure&#146; or that they are a &#145;bother&#146; for expressing concerns with their studies, however finding a distraction could make you feel more positive, or even talking to your classmates you could possibly organise sessions where you meet up and plan your coursework and planned revision sessions. This could boost your confidence, and decide on your career path.
    It may also be helpful to talk to your career advisor at college as they may often talk to students with similar concerns about studies and career paths.
    You have mentioned &#145;you are already a laughing stock at school &#145;, what makes you feel this way? Is there any other issues that you may be facing in college, if this is something that you want to further discuss if so you can talk us anytime.

    Esther @TheMix


    Hi @Past User,

    When i stress, I sadly stress and people often don't understand why i stress. Like i said in my original post I am a carer so i do have a lot of pressures coming from home and the college is aware of this as well as all my tutors know that this as well. We don't have a career adviser as far as I'm aware but i am still new to the college. I try and watch a movie ones a week or a few episodes of my favourite series but last week i struggled to do that due to the high volume of work i had to do.

    I know about self-love and self-care and all that and i know how to deliver all that as well, but i do know that the people around me are my main priority at the moment. I know that cutting down the work into bite size pieces works and thats what i was doing but knowing home many sections i have to do is the hard part.

    @Seven I know we are all human, and i am very much aware of all that are body needs but thanks.

    @Azziman I will always apologise as I don't like admitting that i am struggling.

    Look after yourself

    Sorry again

    Abi
    Post edited by TheMix on
  • Former MemberFormer Member Lyrical Poster Posts: 5,462 Part of The Furniture
    Abi- just wanted to offer you some *hug*s :heart:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Owl Whisperer Posts: 1,020 Wise Owl
    I remember how hard it was juggling coursework and caring for my mother, so I empathize Abi hug.gif You're in my prayers.

    Belle
  • Former MemberFormer Member Carer/musician Posts: 819 Part of The Mix Family
    edited September 18
    Abi- just wanted to offer you some *hug*s :heart:

    Thank you.

    @Past User I know its hard. Just handed in 4 lots of coursework but thats the stuff I am not stressed about.
    Post edited by TheMix on
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 65 Boards Initiate
    Hi Abi. How are you today?

    Thanks for sharing your experience. It's not always easy to take time for ourselves when we need it most. You should be proud of the time you've taken to post on this board as that's part of taking care of yourself. As Esther at The Mix mentioned, the overwhelm can sometimes make you feel as though you are a failure but that couldn't be further from the reality. You're taking steps to consider your workload and manage the expectations of those around you. You're being very responsible and you're seeking support.

    Based on today, would you say that there are any deadlines coming up that you feel you may struggle to meet? If so, it's worth speaking to a teacher you trust who may be able to extend that deadline to give you some space to breathe and take a break. Does that sound like something that could work?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Carer/musician Posts: 819 Part of The Mix Family
    Hi @Mochan

    Based on that day it was nice to get it all submitted but I know what lies a head of me and its not the easiest. I took the day off because i knew there was nothing more i could do to improve the work i had already written, it might not be the best i can do but research in my opinion is a waste of time and should never be have to write an eassy on something.

    Its hard finding a member of staff that i trust now, knowing that i am just lying to them.

    Sorry

    Abi
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