If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Read the community guidelines before posting ✨
Options
Essential support for under 25s
Essential support for under 25s
Take a look around and enjoy reading the discussions. If you'd like to join in, it's really easy to register and then you'll be able to post. If you'd like to learn what this place is all about, head here.
Comments
They dont NEED as you put it, like thousands of people DONT need cosmetic surgery.
When people get married, they then try to start a family then find out they cannot have children they feel incomplete. Its a maternal thing and to be honest it wouldnt matter what I said to you about having children you could never understand because you are male and because you would also just twist everything I or anyone else says.
Why does a person have to justify their reproductive choices to others?
Should they have to? If something can be done to change it? I believe that our own bodies are the only things we can have complete control over, and I'm not just talking about fertility, but if something can be done to change the situation to make something easier or better, then why should they just sit back, defeated in thinking, "Oh well, this is the way I was made, I should live with it." If a window broke, would you just stand there? No, you'd fix it, at least, that's what I'm hoping. And speaking for myself I don't need to justify my bodily choices to anyone, be it piercings, tattoos, the type of birth control I want, or needing access to safe abortion, fertility treatment, cosmetic surgery or adopting a childfree lifestyle etc, afterall, it's so often we hear the phrase, my body, my choice.
I don't want people to 'justify' it.
If something can be done to change it, then perhaps yes.
Of course it's 'your body'. But I think that it denotes a lack of self-esteem if a person cannot accept a basic aspect of themselves. A person born with spina bifida has NO CHOICE but to accept their condition as their is NO CURE!!
It annoys me when I hear crap about women 'hating themselves' for being 'too fat' or something. What emotionally healthy person 'hates themselves'?
There is no cure as such, (not one that I know of) but there have been amazing technological advances in foetal surgery
Didn't you just answer your own question there? Or were you being rhetoric?
Depends on how serious they think that 'basic' aspect is. A mole on their shoulder, the inability to concieve naturally etc? Varies from person to person, I'll let them be the judge of that.
If there is no cure for a condition you have no CHOICE but to accept it.
No. You stated that emotional health means nothing.
In my view they should take it and accept themselves for who they are. That is the basis of self-esteem.
Ok, before this continues any further, one thing I will not tolerate is being misquoted or having my words twisted. Where and in what context have I stated that emotional health means nothing?
Really?
So six billion people have MORE than enough food to eat and natural resources are still at reasonable rates, that means there are 'too many people'?
No. In my view when the global population reaches 10-15 billion and there is a SERIOUS strain on the Earth's resources (unlike today), then there are 'too many' people in the world.
In your own words, what criteria do you have to pass to be, by your standards, 'healthy?'
Why do they deserve sympathy?
What's that got to do with this discussion?
Hrm, as in deviation from the social norm? Self destructive behaviour? Statistical infrequency? If you're going to use psychology as a term to define mental health then you have to know what approach to take. And what you're talking about in the sense of a healthy mind, in the sense of psychology.
Again, maybe you haven't been thrown in to situations where people deviate from the socially excepted norm of mental health. Who knows?
But in all honesty, I think you should research mental health before you come to the conclusion that because a woman desires a baby who cannot have one, she's unhealthy. Otherwise, no offense intended but you come across as either sheltered, or uninformed in that area.
I see people as psychologically unhealthy when they resort to self-destructive behaviour, personally.
As for the debate, I still believe that women should adopt if they can because a lot of kids need it.
Well the basis of self-esteem is accepting yourself for who you are. Self-esteem is what most psychologists would consider healthy.
So?
If she cannot have one, why can't she accept that? No on here has questioned why a person should NOT accept what life throws at them.
An opinion dressed up as fact, huh?
Why can't people accept the way they are? Well it's not a case of accepting infertility in modern society because there are other alternatives.
Are you now going to say that physiotherapy for people who're unlikely to ever walk again is a waste of time because the person in a wheelchair can't accept the fact that they can't walk?
Actually, a friend of mine was facing that, but he worked so hard and now he's on his feet again
So from what perspective are you thinking. Do you believe that fertility treatment is a waste on the NHS? That women who've had this treatment will be unfit mothers? Or are you simply saying that you have no sympathy, thus they shouldn't be allowed babies?
You haven't given a good enough reason to even convince me on this one, you've just made a statement that people should accept who they are and that you have no sympathy for people who can't. But WHY shouldn't they be allowed babies? In the real world.
Most people in society would say that a person has freedom but should respect the freedom of others.
Now a person can respect another's freedom to do something, but they don't have to personally approve of it.
But some of the stuff you put appeared very blind, no offense. So could you please answer the questions to my previous post? I'd like to know why you think the way you do. I'm interested.