yet another self harm thread

BillieTheBot

last night i got really depressed because i keep getting flash backs of when i was raped last year, ive not felt that bad for a long long time. i feel really guilty about it and have to tell my b/f about it cos i dnt want him to just see it by mistake, not that im gonna flash it about or anything stupid.
i dnt know what to do. i just felt so relived when i did it it was like all hte pent up feelings i had inside were flowing away with the blood. i feel so guilty now tho. i dnt know what to do.

Former Member

dont worry about it, i would have done the same thing (just being honest) i can understand why you did it and im not disappointed babe. look ok im upset you did it but i can understand hun. id like to see how bad it is though hun just so i know how bad we are talking here. dont hassle hun i understand and i love you. i wont let a thing like this get in the way!
Dan xXxXxXx

Former Member

Have you ben in touch with Rape Crisis? It doesn't matter how long ago you were attacked, they will be able to help you talk things through:

Rape Crisis
Referral to local centres for women who have been sexually abused or raped.
Telephone: 0115 9348474

Former Member

even if i wanted to do anything about the rape i couldnt because he cousins with my best mate and i need him to be there for me at all times. and my rents dnt know and i dnt want them to know, my mammy has been through so much stuff to do with sexual abuse cos my grandad used to rape her when she was a kid and i dnt want her to get hurt and know that ive been abused to. i know that might not make much sence to some ppl but i couldnt do that to my mammy

Former Member

Whatever you decide to do, Rape Crisis would allow you to talk it through in complete confidence, and give you some support. Your parents might be able to help you more than you think, and they are unlikely to think that you telling them would be hurting them.

Former Member

im adding to the original problem now

i keep hurting my self now since i fist worte this thread i have cut my self every night its really startign to scare me. even before i never cut up this much. i only used to do it when i was in hyterics(sp) but now im doing it because im depressed. and when i see the blood i get even more down and do it some more because my head is telling me that i deserve it and that im a ugly stupid pointless waste of space. i dnt know what to do. i dnt know if im strong enough to quit again.

Former Member

You could start by ringing Bristol Crisis on the evenings they're open:
http://www.thesite.org/info/health/other_mental_health/self_harm.html
They specialise in counselling young women who self-harm.

You could also talk to someone at Samaritans:
08457 909090 or email jo@samaritans.org

Former Member

Originally posted by Zella
im adding to the original problem now

i keep hurting my self now since i fist worte this thread i have cut my self every night its really startign to scare me. even before i never cut up this much. i only used to do it when i was in hyterics(sp) but now im doing it because im depressed. and when i see the blood i get even more down and do it some more because my head is telling me that i deserve it and that im a ugly stupid pointless waste of space. i dnt know what to do. i dnt know if im strong enough to quit again.

Don't beat yourself up coz you're doing it more. I self-harm and have been for 15 months. Sometimes i go through bad patches i once cut myself over 300 types in 4 days yet other times i won't for 2 weeks, and i do it coz im depressed. Sounds odd but i tend to find the more i think about cutting the more it stops me doing it.I think of how much it hurts the scarring the bleeding the lack of sleep coz of the pain how it hurts my friends knowing im doing it etc (although sometimes i just ignore it all) keep trying and talk it out with someone if you want. pm me if you wanna talk , i know exactly what it feels like.
xxx