Dry patch in sex life

Former Member

I really need to rant and vent so here it goes

After breaking up with my ex and my girlfriend before that about a year and a half ago my sex life has been pretty much dry as a bone.

After going on a date with a girl yesterday it made me realise how much I enjoyed having sex with my ex and how much I got along with her. This girl I was with yesterday she was boring and was nothing that I'm looking for in a relationship I know that she would of had sex with me because she told me but I did not have any feelings for her so it would of just been sex and it would not of felt right.

Has anyone else had any dry patches in both sex and love life and do you have any advice for me it's getting me down.

Former Member

I am currently in one. No boyfriend for coming up to 3 years, no sex for about a year and 3 months.

I have been asked out on numerous occasions but none of them really appealed to me so i thought why go through a relationship plus possibly a breakup for someone you're not sure about. I havent met anyone that im that into so i dont have a boyfriend, simple as that. I also havent met anyone i fancy enough for a one night stand (:()

Some might say im picky or whatever and YES the no sex thing sucks, ALOT! but hey. If you're that worried about it oin a dating site

Former Member

In my experience you'll never find someone you're in to if you keep comparing them to your ex - it's only when I stopped doing this that I settled with my most recent bf.

Although thinking about it, he turned out to be a nob so praps I'll shut up now :P

Former Member

Love life - over a year now and it sucks! Sex life not so much, but the longer it goes on the more I realise meaningless sex does absolutely nothing for me!

I don't have any words of wisdom, but I respect your will power to not just go off and have sex when it's really a relationship you're looking for, and I can totally empathise with your situation. I was doing online dating for many months and got no where. I've deleted my profiles and had a month or two now free of dating, although I'm starting to wonder about going back to it.

Former Member

I once went a full 16 years without having sex, if I had to do it again I reckon I could!

If you have an insanely high sex drive and need relief or you will go *kaboom* get down the gym and run it out/work out till it goes. It is amazing how much working out does to take the edge of sexual desire!
Not getting any works wonders as well, when you do find someone you want to get down and naughty with you will be a studly manbeast because you know what it is to want it so badly :d

That's how it worked for me at least!

Former Member

SnuggleBubbles wrote: »

I once went a full 16 years without having sex, if I had to do it again I reckon I could!

What!

Former Member

Are you talking about the 16 years before you lost your virginity?

Former Member

Yeah... That totally counts!

Former Member

Hey there headboy01,

It's hard sometimes to admit to missing sex and even a relationship - and posting here can be very helpful as people can relate :yes:

Even though your post focuses on wanting sex, it seems like you also miss the intimacy side of it. You say you could have had sex with this girl, yet it seems you felt like there wasn't a strong enough connection.

It's completely normal to compare future relationships to exs, but like Smaug mentioned sometimes it can hold you back. Online dating could be something to think about as suggested - and similarly speed dating has had many good comments as it can be a fun night out with friends, all the while meeting someone and later choosing them if you connected!

Hope this helps, do keep venting of needed though

Former Member

My longest dry patch was 18 months between breaking up with my only serious boyfriend and having a casual thing with someone else at uni. I'm currently just over a year into another dry spell simply due to not having met anyone I've been in to for ages - working anti social hours isn't helping either. My only advice is to keep busy and not think about it too much, it's not the be all and end all

Former Member

My dry spell has become years, which is a disgrace for a man as sexy as I am.

Realistically, I have insane body confidence issues. To the point where I think "no woman would want to sleep with me, I'm too fat". Being 6'4 and just being bigger than 95% of the population doesn't help either.

I should probably try online dating but I'm freaked about having to put a picture up or the person meeting me for the first time and being disappointed.

It's a shame because, as a person, I am an absolute delight

Former Member

Oops, ignore drunky drunky