Letting somebody down gently

Former Member

I'm currently on a break with my partner... We've been seeing each other two months and she appears to have fallen for me (they said "I love you" after one month) and it's waaaay too heavy. I didn't realise same sex relationships were like this... Her saying "I love you" after a month and needing constant reassurance... It's really hard for me. We have nothing in common, which I thought could work, but personality-wise, I get very drained from having to emotionally reach out to somebody all the time.

I'm also unsure about how I feel that she's non-monogomous, but always asking me to reassure them. I mean, she's seeing three other people, but I'm their primary one... Shouldn't I be the one asking questions?

You know what? I'm not going to turn this in to a bitch-fest because she's worth more than that... I just feel really lost and like my wings are clipped and I have no idea how to end it. Any advice?

Former Member

are you seeing two people at once or are you talking about your girlfriend in Majestic Plural?

Former Member

She's seeing two guys.

Jesus, I can barely handle one other person. >.<

Former Member

Namaste wrote: »

I'm also unsure about how I feel that they're non-monogomous, but always asking me to reassure them. I mean, they're seeing three other people, but I'm their primary one... Shouldn't I be the one asking questions?

I have no idea how to let someone down gently (or harshly for that matter) but the answer to this is yes. If she is seeing other people (even with your permission) and is simultaneously pestering you to tell her how much you love her....then she is a touch hypocritical no?

Former Member

Namaste wrote: »

and they appear to have fallen for me (they said "I love you" after one month)

they're seeing three other people, but I'm their primary one... Shouldn't I be the one asking questions?

Who is "they" when you are only seeing one person? Am I the only one confused?

Just break up with her. Tell her things are not working out for you, because you feel pressured and you don't agree with her seeing other people (even if it's not true) and things are going too fast and you don't feel it and yadda yadda, basically how you break up with someone.

Former Member

Best to just say what you said in this thread as is.

Former Member

StrubbleS wrote: »

Who is "they" when you are only seeing one person? Am I the only one confused?

Just break up with her. Tell her things are not working out for you, because you feel pressured and you don't agree with her seeing other people (even if it's not true) and things are going too fast and you don't feel it and yadda yadda, basically how you break up with someone.

Sorry, I'll amend it... I meant "she"... I'm just very hungover... I originally wrote "they" as a pronoun (gender neutral), then when I edited it, I wrote "she"