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I Hate You!!!
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I'm sorry, probably going to get in trouble for this but I don't care. There's a certain member of thesite I'd quite happily murder right now. I won't name names but he knows who he is.
He was my boyfriend of nearly 2 years. He just dumped me over the phone even though I'm in the middle of my exams and he was up in Norwich to see me.He says he wants to be able to go out and do things as and when he wants rather than worrying about me. He wants to travel, as do I and I suggested travelling voer the summer, but he wants to travel with other people. The last time he went out clubbing with me was March. Yet he is going out Friday, went out last Monday and went out twice when I was home over Easter without me but with other women. He is refusing to go out less often with them. I have asked him if he could maybe just see them at the pub or just not go out clubbing every week with them or at least go out with me more often but he couldn't even though that. After everything I've put up with from him (sleeping with his whore of an ex when he first started seeing me, he even posted on here about it! pretending to be another woman's boyfriend when I was on holiday in Clacton, promising to come up to see me at uni and twice not turning up because he'd gone out clubbing with that woman and her sister and had gotten so drunk he'd forgotten he was even meant to be seeing me.)
He knows how much of a hard time I'm having recently what with my illness and my arsehole neighbours.
I would write more but I went to see my friend for a few hours halfway through writing this and I've lost the train of my rant. Noticed how he's already deleted me from Facebook yet still has all my friends and his whore of an ex (they split up 2 years ago ffs!) still on there.
Apologies for spelling, I'm not having a good day.
He was my boyfriend of nearly 2 years. He just dumped me over the phone even though I'm in the middle of my exams and he was up in Norwich to see me.He says he wants to be able to go out and do things as and when he wants rather than worrying about me. He wants to travel, as do I and I suggested travelling voer the summer, but he wants to travel with other people. The last time he went out clubbing with me was March. Yet he is going out Friday, went out last Monday and went out twice when I was home over Easter without me but with other women. He is refusing to go out less often with them. I have asked him if he could maybe just see them at the pub or just not go out clubbing every week with them or at least go out with me more often but he couldn't even though that. After everything I've put up with from him (sleeping with his whore of an ex when he first started seeing me, he even posted on here about it! pretending to be another woman's boyfriend when I was on holiday in Clacton, promising to come up to see me at uni and twice not turning up because he'd gone out clubbing with that woman and her sister and had gotten so drunk he'd forgotten he was even meant to be seeing me.)
He knows how much of a hard time I'm having recently what with my illness and my arsehole neighbours.
I would write more but I went to see my friend for a few hours halfway through writing this and I've lost the train of my rant. Noticed how he's already deleted me from Facebook yet still has all my friends and his whore of an ex (they split up 2 years ago ffs!) still on there.
Apologies for spelling, I'm not having a good day.
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Comments
Sounds like you deserve somebody that wants to be with you, and to be see with you. Not saying either you or he are terrible people, as I don't know either of you, but going by what you've posted, he's been a bit of a dick.
Nobody deserves to be with someone like that, you're better off without him and with somebody who appreciates and wants to spend time with you.
Big hugs xxx
I'm coming home next week as well and we were going to go out :crying:
He can read what he wants, he got all the reaction he could've wanted when he told me this down the phone.
Thanks lol, sorry if that came across a bit snappy.
Is it yohanes13?
/e: no.. yohanes seems to be a reasonable dood. Hmmm...
Anyway. It's ok to have a rant. Good thing it's over.
Hey Marina,
You really do deserve hugs right now - sounds like a rotten time.
And if you prefer to write things down, then you shouldn't be prevented from doing that here.
All I'm going to have a word about is referring to to the ex in the way you have as I'm not convinced she deserves it, nor feel it's fair under the circumstances. I don't know the ins and outs of the situation, but remember it always takes two people and there's always choice involved. That's not to say you haven't been treated unfairly and I echo g_angel - you really deserve to be with someone on an equal footing. Just remember that posting this kind of stuff can have a bit of fall out.
Take good care of yourself and people will be here for you for futher comfort.
Sounds like you are well rid.
And don't say it was me.
I'm sorry Helen. I know what I have said may be seen to be out of order to the ex involved but she cheated on him and then she cheated with him whilst I was with him. And I know I was stupid to even consider going out with him after that, but as my friend Laura has repeatedly said tonight, I can't blame myself for what has happened because I did what I felt was right at the time and I can't help who I fall in love with.
Tonight has frankly been shite. I was trying to keep things together for my friend Fatima's birthday and when a fight was breaking out between 3 of my friends I tried to diffuse the situation and ended up getting knocked to the floor and being carried to first aid by a bunch of randoms. It didn't get much better after that.
Escorted back to the wrong flat, getting my hand caught in a door, another fight and me crying my eyes out to my friend's neighbours. Excellent times. I got back an hour ago. My neighbours are partying again. You know how long they kept me awake last night? 'til 9am when my cleaner came in. I tried to call lots of people and eventually, both of my parents, God (whichever one may or may not exist) bless them both, spoke to me and tried to calm me down. My dad said he'd call me about lunchtime which is nice, considering we've not been talking lately. My mum told me to take some paracetamol for my hand, but I can't because I've been drinking, and I don't want to risk screwing my liver right now.
Yes, I've thought about ending it all in the past few hours but there are friends who need me right now and even I can't be that much of a bitch to do this to other people.
This makes more sense than previous posts because I keep going back and correcting errors (it's the lit student in me.) I have pins and needles in my face, everything falling apart and an exam on Monday. I know I have said and done things that weren't pleasant. I wish today never happened. I wish I didn't have to listen to friends and family saying that they are glad that I'm not with him any more. I still love him. I can't change that overnight. All I can say is, I'm sorry for being pathetic at the moment, all I can do is promise you, people I have never met in my life, that I will do my best to not screw up my degree because of this (the nature of my degree means that I need 55% across years 1 & 2 to get anywhere, rather than the usual 40%.) I know that posting here wasn't the best idea. I know calling my parents at this hour wasn't the best idea. I know a lot of things I've done in the past 14 hours haven't been advisable.
But I'd still like to be listened to. To be loved and to be valued as a friend. I'd like to still feel comfortable posting here, no matter how awkward, if that's ok with you?
Signed,
A slightly suicidal Marina Aniseed (my real name is Fran btw.)
xXx
On a practical note, have you tried ear plugs? If you want some I have shit loads.... Uni gives them out.
Hey, posting here and talking to your parents are both good ideas when you're feeling so low. Also, as you say, falling out of love with someone won't happen over night, but it can happen over time and so long as you're not too hard on yourself then progress will come in small steps.
I know your degree is an extra worry at the moment, but it's something for you and only you and it's important to have those things right now.
My dad has said to come home for a few days so that I can revise without all this trouble. I feel like I've been thrown down a flight of stairs or something. My hand still looks terrible.
Gah.
This has not been my year, let alone my day.
My advice is to try not to worry about this bad period of your life, like all good things come to an end, so to do the bad times. Once the dust has settled you'll be able to pick yourself up and move on with your life.
In mean time and keep yourself surrounded by friends and family. Oh and also allow yourself time to heal and get over this bloke.
What earplugs are you using? Living next to a main road in a house full of people who like to keep me awake at all hours has made me a bit of an earplug expert. Boots do some silicone ear plugs called Bioears (I think - don't have them with me right now) which are EXCELLENT and stop me hearing pretty much anything.
And also sending much love and a whole shitton of hugs your way, because you sound like you need it.
Well, I'm back at home now. The shock and alcohol have worn off and it's now I'm beginning to find out how much damage was done. My hand is still painful and my thumb is begging to bruise under all of the redness now. I think my friend may have done me some damage in our tussle on Tues. Throughout the night and continuing today I have had feelings of sickness, dizzyness, chills, shakes, sharp abdominal pains and pains in my chest when I breathe. I told my dad last night and he said it was indigestion so gave me an indigestion tablet and some paracetamol. Combined with my lack of sleep in knocked me for six at I woke up around 1pm. I am feeling very faint but I am trying to stay awake/conscious as nobody is in the house. My mum is at work, my brother at school and my dad's at a Freemason's meeting...anyway, I don't want to go rushing off to the NHS if nothing is wrong, I want to talk to someone sensible ie my mum before I do anything.
As for my ex. We are going to swap back stuff next week. We are going to try to be friends, or at least civil to each other. I work 10 minutes from him, we socialise in the same pubs and clubs when I'm back here and we were introduced via a mutual friend and we agreed that it wasn't fair on him to have to choose which one of us to go out with if we can't behave in the same room together. It was quite upsetting coming home to find my birthday cards still up and the beautiful flowers he got me still alive after 2 weeks.
Finally, I know I should email my adviser as I have an exam on Monday. Should I do it ASAP or wait to see if my mum says to see a doctor and then see what they say and relay the info? Sorry this is long.
* Sorry for spelling, I realise it's bad but the screen is beginning to blur on me and I can't find my glasses.
Thanks for the messages, they were very kind of you all
My urology referral has come through as well, yay!
On the downside, I no longer think that being friends is really an option after some new information has come to light.