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Basicly you can either split up with him now or resolve the issue of him being too loveydovey with his girlfriends and be content to rub one out in the shower like guys do when they cant get sex every night.
You relate very little of his feelings - a friend of mine was in the same situation as you - needed sex, her boyfriend is a fantastic person but she ended up hating every little thing because she couldnt get sex all the time - If you can't live happily without sex at least 7 times a week its time to admit that to yourself and leave him instead of dragging yourself into a hole and being frustrated and upset and waiting for him to make a mistake so it can be him that splits you up.
he wont tell me his feelings, after about an hour he just acts as though i hadnt just poured my heart out.
im just scared that hes going to want sex less ansd less until hes completely bored of me and wants to find someone new and exciting
im tryin to think of ways to show him how much i love him andthat my feeliing for him havent changed and that i feel exactly the same about him as i did 17 months ago...
He is right in what he said though. Things do change as a relationship goes on. And you're not necessarily going to be left with 2 people wanting exactly the same things. What you need is compromise. If he is rejecting you all the time, well that's not gona do you any good. But if it's a case of you having sex 2-3times a week but you want it more, well I think you need to just compromise on that one.
It does seem a bit weird him going off with his grilf friends all the time though, but maybe that's just the way you've written it.
It doesn't necessarily mean that he doesnt' love you just that your relationship has moved into another phase.....
i have to say i started noticing it just before we moved in together, about 6 months ago. 90% of the time im rejected, it seems that we only have sex on his terms, only when he wants it.
i even try hinting that even if he doesnt want sex, then maybe there could be a little foreplay, its only fair, i never neglect him when its my time of the month, we dont have sex so i do other things for him [handjobs etc] even though im feeling gross and frumpy. yet when his in no mood i get nothing also! its not really fair...
he was texting one of his girlfriends last night..all night, constantly, he hardly said 4 words to me last night... even that was "are you brewing up?"
:banghead:
The problem is not yours and it takes two to fix it...I would ask whether his rejection of you sexually and his continued communication with his girlfriends (which in itself isn't bad but the fact that he knows it hurts you is!) is his cowardly way of making you break up with him (just search the internet...guys do this!).
He probably very much enjoys your company but he's got one leg in this relationship and the other out of it.
This guy is clearly not meeting your needs or even attempting to fix them...sometimes, and I know it's hard, you've got to assess whether this is the life you want and whether you are truly happy. It's very easy to think of yourself and your life as one of a couple but take a moment to think how happy you really are and whether this relationship is enhancing you.
Again, don't think his rejection of you is your fault but it may be the wake up call that this relationship is not right for the both of you. You sound soo doting and thoughtful and a girl that any guy should want to be with. You deserve to be wanted, loved and respected.
I really do feel for you and keep us posted.
i know its really bad but he left himself signed into facebook, i dont know why [and im extremely ashamed of this] i went through his inbox and hes been sending at least two girls sexual messages and tell ing them to text him [i know hes been texting these girls...now i know what about...]
the thing is i realy want to confront him about it but im ashamed about where i got the info [ie snooping]
its not like he doesnt snoop my private stuff, i caught him looking throughg my fone on numerous occasions but im not bothered becasue io have nothing to hide.
im so scared, i dont know what to do
i dont want to lose him...
What will you do if/when he admits the texting of other girls?
Ri - there is no trust between you else, you (and he) wouldn't pry. It'll eat you up knowing that he's been playing the single guy behind your back and you can't/won't tell him because you've been prying. And, it'll not stop here...you'll always be looking over your shoulder and wondering what he's doing/saying to other girls and you might even continue digging/snooping to find out if he is cheating. That's not a life that any girl should lead.
I think deep down, you know what the answer is, but it's not the answer you'd like or want to hear.
What are scared of hun? It doesn't make sense...you want to stay with a guy that hurts you and doesn't respect you and meet your needs and is giving so many signals that suggests this relationship isn't for him. Are you really happy? YOU ARE WORTH SO MUCH MORE THAN THIS. I know that it's comforting to be in a relationship, particularly if you're insecure but by breaking it off with him, you retain the control, dignity and satisfaction that you're a SUPERFOX - you can the time to get over the hurt, rediscover yourself, your friends, and meet a guy who would love (and never hurt you) along the way.
Be brave. :thumb:
Harsh as it sounds, but it does appear that you already have. He's not being intimate with you, but is flirting and being suggestive with other people.
It doesn't matter how much you want to "keep" him. If his heart isn't in it, then regardless of whether he is physically there or not, you don't "have" him...
I know it's brutal and tactless, but it's time to start looking and planning for how you can move forward from here as an individual.
KittyNicks is bang-on the money. But I'll add this - is it that you're scared of losing him, or are you scared of facing the world alone?