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Why are some women just so fucking full of shit?
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I'm pretty pissed off right now so perhaps I'll come out with some stuff I wouldn't normally say.
Why can't some women just say what they fucking mean?
Been chatting to this woman online, she used to be one of my students when I ran a martial arts class about 12 years ago so although we hadn't spoken in years, we pretty much caught up pretty quickly and by fuck has she changed. She wasn't ugly back then but she's gorgeous now.
Anyway we've been chatting about this and that for a few months, nothing really in it until last week I asked her out.
She said she would but it wouldn't be a date because, and I quote, "I don't really want a relationship right now, I haven't really got the time as I'm so busy with work and my mind wouldn't be in it".
That's fair enough I told her and I'd respect that - I think she knows me well enough to be sure that I'm aware that no means no.
Anyway she hasn't been online much lately and hasn't been answering my texts (I don't text her that much but when I do she normally replies) which was odd but there you go.
Anyway I catch up with her on facebook tonight and she's 200 miles away in Nottingham. Staying with a guy she met on facebook and now they're an item!!
200 miles away in fucking Nottingham!! With a guy she's not even met???
OK ok, calm down.
It's her life, she can see who she wants and I'm not going to be arsey with her, she didn't promise me anything.
But why the front? Why all the "I haven't go the time for a relationship" bollocks? I'm guessing she just doesn't fancy me - hell I can take that, I'm mature enough, so why couldn't she just be fucking honest with me?
I don't think for one minute it was to "spare my feelings" as it's not like I was professing undying love for her.
Why do some women feel the need to come out with that sort of bollocks? Why can't you just be straight and honest?
FFS
Why can't some women just say what they fucking mean?
Been chatting to this woman online, she used to be one of my students when I ran a martial arts class about 12 years ago so although we hadn't spoken in years, we pretty much caught up pretty quickly and by fuck has she changed. She wasn't ugly back then but she's gorgeous now.
Anyway we've been chatting about this and that for a few months, nothing really in it until last week I asked her out.
She said she would but it wouldn't be a date because, and I quote, "I don't really want a relationship right now, I haven't really got the time as I'm so busy with work and my mind wouldn't be in it".
That's fair enough I told her and I'd respect that - I think she knows me well enough to be sure that I'm aware that no means no.
Anyway she hasn't been online much lately and hasn't been answering my texts (I don't text her that much but when I do she normally replies) which was odd but there you go.
Anyway I catch up with her on facebook tonight and she's 200 miles away in Nottingham. Staying with a guy she met on facebook and now they're an item!!
200 miles away in fucking Nottingham!! With a guy she's not even met???
OK ok, calm down.
It's her life, she can see who she wants and I'm not going to be arsey with her, she didn't promise me anything.
But why the front? Why all the "I haven't go the time for a relationship" bollocks? I'm guessing she just doesn't fancy me - hell I can take that, I'm mature enough, so why couldn't she just be fucking honest with me?
I don't think for one minute it was to "spare my feelings" as it's not like I was professing undying love for her.
Why do some women feel the need to come out with that sort of bollocks? Why can't you just be straight and honest?
FFS
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Comments
In fact, I'd have way more respect for someone who called me an idiot to my face than someone who wouldn't do it out of "politeness" (this was an example).
I'd never be such a cock to suggest she owes me or anything but a few years after she left my training class she was confronted by some nugget behind a club who tried to attack her. He ended up with a broken wrist and dislocated shoulder after she proved she wasn't going to take any shit from him - and she later publicly thanked me and acknowledged it was me who showed her the techniques and gave her the confidence to fight back against the guy.
We kinda have an unspoken bond since then - we've never been what you'd call 'best mate' close but I'd have though we were at some kind of stage where there'd be no bullshit.
Guess I was wrong.
Anyway since this evening it's come out that she said exactly the same thing to another guy I know, difference is he's fucking livid.
no big deal
I hate that bollocks so much! Doesn't make sense though, she said she wouldn't be able to put her mind in to a relationship yet she gets together with a guy 200 miles away? Did she not think I'd notice the industrial sized canister of irony being waved about there?!
kickbanignore is the only solution.
How do I put it in to words that I can't stand being pitied and will respect them more if they just come out with the truth?
What's the best way to word it so a woman will pay attention to it and not be intimidated or whatever?
As for avoiding a similar situation in the future, I'd play it cooler. Don't ask for a date, or think of it in those terms unless she's made it clear that's what she's looking for. Some women don't like to commit to something romantic until they've had a chance to spend some time with a guy and suss out if there's anything there.
Thing is though, I was playing it cool. When we talked about going on a non-date I made it clear she wasn't going to get any attention off me.
OK I might have paid if we'd gone to the cinema but I'm kinda old-fashioned that way, I'd pay (or at least offer) if I was with a woman no matter who it was.
I can't see anything in my approach that made it look like I was after something other than hanging out with a cool woman. To be honest I think this is why I'm more pissed off, I feel let down by someone I thought was a mate and in my world you don't do shit like that to friends.
If she thought I was coming on to her then that's a different story. I wasn't coming on to her and we made it clear us meeting up was a non-date.
So why the need for all the bullshit?
And they wanna, like, spare your feelings and junk. Even though in doing that they just make it worse.
Atleast you weren't a relationship for three years and then she up and tells you that she's a lez. That shit fuckin kiiiiiiiiillllls.
So if you just saw it as being matey, why not support her in her realtionship with this other guy?
Thanks.:rolleyes:
OP - if you come across as aggreisve as you do on here, then I'm not surprised really. Maybe she didn't want to hurt your feelings by telling you she wasn't intersted?
First of all I made it clear I posted that while I was pissed off.
Secondly she had no reason to assume I was interested in her.
Thirdly I really cannot stand being pitied!! It doesn't make sense because her new relationship status is plastered all over facebook, her profile pic is her with her new guy, if I WAS trying to get off with her and she "didn't want to hurt my feelings" then she's now got a funny way of showing it!!
Oh come on, now, you know as well as I do that I only mean most women!
:thumb:
You take things really seriously, don't you.
SOOOOOOOR-YYYYYYYYY
I'd be grateful that she didn't give you false hope. Now, that one's a complete bugger and I've been there.
There was never any hope needed because I was not interested in her and told her so!
I expect honesty from people I call my mates.
In general girls think differently than guys so the logic applied to situations is different.
You said in the original post you asked her out and she said it wouldn't be a date so I can't see why you're going on about how she shouldn't have said what she said if the impression she got was that you were after her.
The way I treat my friends and the way I treat guys I know are keen is totally different. Most girls can tell the difference.
i think youre being really judgemental. She obviously thought you were interested so was trying to let you down gently. Its not complete honesty, but noone has the right to expect total honesty from anyone tbh. Maybe with a partner if its a mutual agreement, but even then there may be white lies to save feelings here and there. It will regularly happen with friends, and i think by your reaction here, you were actually either more interested than you let on, or youre just embarrassed that she thought you fancied her when you dont.
One of the pitfalls of platonic friendships
Maybe something to do with me telling her I wasn't interested?
Sorry but that's just crap. You should see her FB profile now, picture of them together everywhere, comments about how she had a great time, 'cute' messages on each others' wall. Not the sort of way most people "let someone down gently".
Sorry but that's even more crap! I don't lie to my mates, they don't lie to me? Perhaps you might be in the habit of BS'ing to those close to you but please don't judge everyone that way!