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I hate slags. If they're timewasters then they're not worth worrying about anyway, right?
Whoa. Harsh, much?
Okay, maybe slags was the wrong words.
But I don't have time for men or women who make sport out of people feelings.
I've seen that happen with men and women. Also, I've seen these kinds of comments in a couple of threads - traits attributed to women that are really about individuals rather than gender. I think it was icey in another thread. I find it quite surprising coming from you guys. :chin:
Anyhow, not wanting to derail...
Bri-namite (as raggy says) and Firefly are hitting the nail on the head I reckon.
Well that's because the threads were asking for advice about girls. I could have said 'people' but thought it was more relevent to say 'women'. And I'm only giving another opinion.
The reason I phrased it as such was because of the way firefly phrased her response. I'm just in a grumpy mood :grump:
edit: though I find it surprising and a bit hurtful that you're implying icey or I are behaving in a sexist manner. But then again I'm in one of those sensitive moods...
Hey, I know you've been hurt badly in the past, and of course your opinions are as important as anybody else's. The main reason I mentioned this is because I do think language and the words we use really are important, and do impact on the way posts are perceived, but maybe I've placed too much emphasis on that. So, sorry, last thing I wanted to do was cause any hurt. x
Tell her from the start you need a woman who can communicate clearly and honestly with you.
But I wouldnt go around saying you want something meaningful with her from the beginning,just say you like her and want to see her again sometime but dont tell her when.If you give the game away from the start she cant sit at home wondering about you and trying to figure you out,which is something women seem to love to do.
Nope, that's the whole point mate you really can't win.
Keep being your honest self and fuck them if they can't handle that. Do not bend or change for them. 4 birds out of how many of millions of women have given you the fuck around.
Every dog has it's day - you've came into contact with some time wasting fleas, now their out of your hair and gone you can get back in the game.
But maybe don't try so hard - Girls like things to be a game, you want relationship, get with the game. It sucks arse but we don't make the rules
hang on...so...you met a month ago?
and you expect her to let you know how she felt a month ago?
so in other words, before you'd even "courted" you wanted to know her thoughts on getting into a relationship with you?
fair enough you want something serious and not a fling....but most "serious" things start out as a bit of fun!
most couples don't usually meet, and within minutes decide to get into a relationship....things progress....first date, 2nd date, fun, meet family/friends etc....
you cant just say that you want a relationship and she doesnt that it's a write off, you never know how feelings can change over time
so what if you've been on a few dates and she doesnt wanna be with you? keep going until you find someone who does
it's not about wasting your time, infact, I'd say it was the opposite! She'd be wasting your time if she got into a relationship with you when it wasn't what she really wanted!
if you tell someone on the first date you want to get serious, they are inevitably gonna be a bit freaked out. personally, i would be less inclined to date someone longer if they said something like this. it places too much pressure on a fledgling flirtation that isn't even a relationship yet.
i know its easy to say, but if i was you i'd try to chill out a bit. see what happens. relationships aren't black & white, especially at the start. it's why it's so exciting, because you don't know exactly what will happen. and you can't control it...
By letting them know you are ultimately looking for a relationship then that IS what you are telling them.
Is that meant to be sarcastic?
"Girls like things to be a game" Are you being serious??
So by saying I'm not in to shagging around, women hear "I want to marry you"??
Fuckinell...
Fucking 'headwork' more like.
Calm down.
You said earlier, you make it clear from the beginning that you want a relationship. To the majority of people a relationship used in that context usually means some sort of serious bond with someone. I'm sorry if you think I'm having a go or something, because I'm really not.
I'm not calmed up - I just think you're mistaken. I've never met anyone who think of things in terms as being so black and white like that. Hell I'm not going to run down the aisle with someone I've only just met. I just don't want to be shagging around when I'm with someone and I'd expect her to be the same.
Fair enough. The way you just worded that, makes a lot more sense to me. Perhaps I'm just a bit simple
I do tend to think of things in black and white, I'm not into game playing and I think it is very important to be clear from the beginning. However, I personally think there needs to be a crossover of where its just friendly getting to know you dating and then a more serious exclusive relationship. I wouldn't expect anyone to just be exclusive with me after one or two dates. Not until we'd fully got to know each other (I like to keep my options open
http://www.thedailymash.co.uk/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=1465&Itemid=59
Not sure how it's connected to the thread but I felt like posting it
I'm not quite sure where you're going with that
Yep. Don't think I've ever been in a relationship where on some level, the girl/woman hasn't played some sort of game, be it mind games, waiting set time before replying to me, or mentioned another guy to provoke a jealous reaction from me.
Those are the ones that spring to mind off the top of my head.
Don't get me wrong some of these games work out well for me and I'll play along. I understand why some birds do it, it's to keep things unpredictable and interesting. Some girls just do it because they need drama in their relationships.
I can see why you feel they were wasting your time, because they didnt have the courtesy to tell you they had moved on or that you were not the right man for them but you will get that with the end of lots of short term relationships, I don't think its specific to one particular gender.
You come across as very angry about it and I understand why, but you have to let it go, people will let you down, it's not nice but it's only going to hurt you as long as you let it, there will be the right woman for you but you are only going to find her if you let it happen naturally and if you start thinking that all women will do that to you then you will eventually become cynical and unwilling to open up your heart.
Good luck finding someone that is really special and deserves all you can give to her.
Well you've been in the wrong relationships then. IMO thats not how things are meant to be.
That's the type of thing I used to do when I was younger but then you realise that it doesn't get you anywhere. It's immature and daft because neither of you really know what the other person is thinking.
Glenn Quagmire - it's fine if you discuss with the woman you're seeing where you would like the relationship to go. I don't think it's that unusual for that type of conversation to arise early on in the dating. However I think it's unfair to say that these women are timewasters. They would like to pursue a relationship but only with the right man and unfortunately you haven't been that man. Dating doesn't always work out, that's just how it is and eventually you do find the right person.
Yep things shouldn't be that way but try telling your heart that your in the wrong relationship and to stop loving that person.
The best 'game' my ex tried to play was the 'I wanna play the field and maybe when the time is right we'll get back together should fate allow' Or along those lines. *The Translation* - I wanna fuck about but leave you hanging onto hope that should I get bored of whoring-around that I can come back to you at the drop of a hat. :yeees:
lol and The bitch wondered why I wanted her out of my life! Anyway gotta love those games!
Glenn Quagmire sorry for hijacking the thread, hope it all works out and don't lose faith:)
Giggedy