Sex With Friend?

Former Member

Has anybody ever had a close friend of the opposite sex, whom they were close friends with and also had sex with. Being more then fuck buddies, but not in a relationship with one another. You could both still date, kiss and possibly have sex with other people???

Because a sort of situation to this looks like it his happening, and i don't want to lose my friend for the sake of casual sex, as it might change how close we are... But then again, it might end up in a relationship so i just dont know.

Former Member

Nearly, 3 times. But it never actually happened as I wasn't interested.

Former Member

Yes, and it went tits up because it was built up so much and there was a lot of pressure there. I stayed exclusive to her because I was very fond of her, no idea whether she did to me or not.

But it fucked up the friendship for a while afterwards. Just be careful, it's a long road to get back the friendship you once had if it does go wrong.

Former Member

i have and still have got that sort of relationship, it's working fine because he is in the army and we act like u have exactly explained

Former Member

I think if you are that close, and you are that fond of each other, then if you start having sex without any further commitment then you will cause problems for yourself. If you want to be with them you should try being a couple; if you don't want to be with them, I think you should get your fun from someone who you are less emotionally attached to.

It caused problems for me and my friend until we decided to be a proper couple, and then it was wonderful.

Former Member

What kermit said.

Former Member

Sofie wrote: »

What kermit said.

I agree. :yes:

Former Member

Aye, sorta same situation. Seeing a mate of mine, we hook up whenever we're out and it's nothing too serious, we both date other people. Though I'm getting a bit concerned now, she likes me more than I like her and sometimes I really couldn't be fucked going with her on a night out but have to cos I don't wanna let her down. Thouugh it's sweet most of the time.

Former Member

Yep, I'm in that situation at the moment. However, the way we're going, it looks fairly likely that we're going to be a couple soon. I wouldn't complain if it did happen.

Former Member

On the other hand, it feels good and you might die tomorrow.

Former Member

I believe its incredible near-impossible to have casual sex without either

a) wanting it to be more, which isn't always mutual, or
b) having a problem and falling out.

Of course if you both want more and have a relationship then fine, but that's not what you set out to achieve so how likely is it.

In my experience I've done it once, but then I got really upset when he ended it to see someone else even though I knew that was fair enough because I didn't want anything more at the time - but it just kind of messed up the atmosphere. We're mates again now, though. But ask yourself whether a hitch in friendship (which might be hard to recover from) is something worth risking.

-Jess-

Former Member

Thank you all. I think at this stage, i am the one who has feelings for her more so then she has for me, so if we start having sex and she just wants to keep it casual, i doubt i would be able to go back to just being friends after... at least not for a long time.

Former Member

I'd find it impossible with a close friend. There are people I find attractive and are friends with, but would never consider as a girlfriend. But if I found my close friends attractive, then why would I want her as anything other than a girlfriend? If I didn't find them attractive, then why would I want to fuck them? If I get on with someone that well, and find them attractive, then I couldn't only have casual sex with them without it fucking me up.

Former Member

Bullseye wrote: »

Has anybody ever had a close friend of the opposite sex, whom they were close friends with and also had sex with. Being more then fuck buddies, but not in a relationship with one another. You could both still date, kiss and possibly have sex with other people???

Because a sort of situation to this looks like it his happening, and i don't want to lose my friend for the sake of casual sex, as it might change how close we are... But then again, it might end up in a relationship so i just dont know.

Sex with close friends, it will always always turn out into something more if you let it. It might seem the right idea at the time, but for the sake of a future friendship, if it means that much to you, I wouldn't go there. You'll inevitability fall out and get sick of each other in the end, and in relationship terms split up.

Staying friends, can be done after a break up, but it's hard, very hard, for whatever obvious reason you can think of. I think its best to see someone, who you know enough about to like, but then not being that close to get on each other nerves. you dig?

fucking close friends is usually how people hook up though innit? tut... :chin: What I mean is, I've been there and fucked up a few friendships by doing the same thing...

Former Member

MancDan wrote: »

SYou'll inevitability fall out and get sick of each other in the end, and in relationship terms split up.

I married my best friend...

Former Member

I have a friend or infact several friends who I have in the past fooled around with - one in particular over a period of 5 year - nearly 15 years later we are still friends and still close - so it is possible but it depends on how you approach the situation. We didn't have actual sex though - maybe that would have changed things - humm I dunno.

Having said that all my friends are right incestuous and have all done stuff with each other at some point or another so we are probably all wierd.

Former Member

Kermit wrote: »

I married my best friend...

congratulations :thumb:

Former Member

You shouldn't be so negative about things.

Former Member

I'm a realist. Nothing wrong with that

Former Member

I think that's really sad, and it limits life expecting everything to go wrong.

Of all the people I know who started dating their good friends, its always worked out.

Former Member

Kermit wrote: »

I think that's really sad, and it limits life expecting everything to go wrong.

Of all the people I know who started dating their good friends, its always worked out.

Same here. But of all the people who have attempted to start dating a good friend by revealing their feelings, plenty haven't worked out too.

Former Member

Why's being a 'realist' sad? I see things for what they are and form my opinion. If I've fucked freinds about shaggin them, then I'm not going to go there again am I?! Lesson learnt. If someone wants an opinion, I'm therefore happy to give it. That is whats she's asking for, an opinion! At a young age the likelyhodd is you wont stay together for long or be freinds in the same way when you split! Just the way it is. It's worth avoiding if pos.

Former Member

I see your only 23, I dunno then. Depends what sort of relationship your after.

Former Member

I've tried it and it all got a bit funky to be honest.

I reckon its a good idea if you like sex often with some one you're comfortable with as long as you're the sort of person who can detatch themselves from becoming 'emotionally involved'.
If you both feel the same towards eachother should be all good.

Former Member

I'm With Stupid wrote: »

Same here. But of all the people who have attempted to start dating a good friend by revealing their feelings, plenty haven't worked out too.

The thing is, we have been friends for absolutely ages, since we were both teens. She knows already i love her to bits, as we have been best friends for ages. She told me she fancied me a lot since we have been friends, but that doesnt mean she has any feelings for me that way now. But then again, i know she is attracted to me and wouldnt have any issues getting physical, i suppose all i can do is see how things happen from here on really.

Former Member

Kermit wrote: »

I married my best friend...

Aaah but was she/he your best friend to start with or did she/he grow to be ?

Former Member

Kermit wrote: »

I married my best friend...

Just don't tell GWST

Former Member

Ah yeah i had sex with my best boy mate. Twas not a good idea, ended up in the biggest argument ever and me chuckin a bottle at his head. Funnily enough we don't chat any more :chin:

Former Member

Kermit wrote: »

I married my best friend...

Wish my best friends fancied me...

Former Member

JustThinking..X wrote: »

Aaah but was she/he your best friend to start with or did she/he grow to be ?

It's obviously got stronger, but we were very close friends right from the word go.

I think people should be more optimistic about romance, because I think most people are good when it comes down to it.

Former Member

Kermit wrote: »

It's obviously got stronger, but we were very close friends right from the word go.

I think people should be more optimistic about romance, because I think most people are good when it comes down to it.

... apart from estate agents