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I'm always on the lookout for something "better"...
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hey everyone,
For me women are like buses or whatever the phrase is. There can be long periods of drought when I haven't pulled in months, but then things go my way and I'm nicely set up in a relationship.
My problem is that whenever I'm in a relationship, even though I'd be really happy with the girl I'm with (otherwise I wouldn't be going out with them), it's not that I'm actively on the lookout for other "opportunities" but if they come my way, I will always actively consider them. ie if I come across someone who I like more who wants to go out with me I would consider dumping the girl I'm with to go out with them.
Is this natural, being happy with who you're with but "if something better comes along" to be crude, considering going for it? It's not that I'm not content with the girl I'd be with in the first place. Like at the moment I'm with a really nice girl I'd happily spend the rest of my life with, but another girl who's gorgeous wants to go out with me, and it's like I'd be kicking myself if I turned down the opportunity for something that could be 'better' (ie a better relationship, better sex, better future life etc).
Thx
For me women are like buses or whatever the phrase is. There can be long periods of drought when I haven't pulled in months, but then things go my way and I'm nicely set up in a relationship.
My problem is that whenever I'm in a relationship, even though I'd be really happy with the girl I'm with (otherwise I wouldn't be going out with them), it's not that I'm actively on the lookout for other "opportunities" but if they come my way, I will always actively consider them. ie if I come across someone who I like more who wants to go out with me I would consider dumping the girl I'm with to go out with them.
Is this natural, being happy with who you're with but "if something better comes along" to be crude, considering going for it? It's not that I'm not content with the girl I'd be with in the first place. Like at the moment I'm with a really nice girl I'd happily spend the rest of my life with, but another girl who's gorgeous wants to go out with me, and it's like I'd be kicking myself if I turned down the opportunity for something that could be 'better' (ie a better relationship, better sex, better future life etc).
Thx
0
This discussion has been closed.
Comments
Honestly, I think if something is "right" then you know it is and you won't feel the need to move on like you do now
Seriously? You'd be happy to marry one of these girls, but you're still on the lookout for something better? Contentment is not a reason to commit yourself for life...
It does sound to me a little like you're seeing women for convenience and because they're there, rather than because you particularly want them. If you genuinely had a strength of feelings for them, you wouldn't be on the lookout for something better - you would be 100% content with what you had, no matter how annoying they are or how many better looking people you saw.
As long as it's all casual, then i wouldn't worry - i suspect that as and when you find someone you're really happy with then it won't occur to you to look elsewhere.
better for you in what way? Do you mean more good looking?
like the way people often fancy their boy/girlfriend's best mate as their out of reach to that person.
I think its natural as your young (i assume...) and just having fun whereas, when you grow up a little and find the right girl who you truely love you will actually want to be with HER and only HER.
I was always like you but at the moment im with a guy i REALLY like and when i see other guys i actually don't want to be with them, i never thought i'd have that, i think you just haven't found 'the one' yet.
I dunno, however great your other half is, and however content you are with them, surely there could always be a better opportunity which would make your life even better than it is with the person you're currently with, potentially..
Reminded me of this: http://www.laddertheory.com/ladderconstruction.htm
Sounds to me like you're just not ready to commit. I think when you meet someone who completely blows your mind that you'll feel differently, but don't sweat it in the meantime.
I felt like this for a while. There comes a point where you have a kind of realisation that... yeah, there might be someone a bit better looking or more impressive to your mates out there, but you're actually a good, happy fit with this person. I imagine you just know it when you feel it. People hedge their bets in all areas of life, and this is exactly the same. You have to decide whether letting all these relationships (or potential relationships) slide on the off-chance that something better might come along is really worth it in the long-run. As long as you have no regrets and bear in mind that the grass isn't always greener then I don't see this as a problem
I think you need to realise the perfect person on paper doesn't exist. I mean, sure, hypothetically I would love to go out with a guy who is rich, owns his own home, is stunningly good looking (actually I wouldn't want to go out with a really good looking guy so ignore that one), easy-going, etc etc, BUT
what about chemistry? I think the only thing you can go on is how well you get on with someone, whether you 'click'..cos if you finished with someone for silly reasons, those are the things you would miss.
What, pay £1.40p and go all the way ?
(sorry, couldn't resist any longer)
Because beauty is in the eye of the beholder? I find some people attractive, that doesn't necessarily mean I think they are drop-dead gorgeous though.