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Ladies, why do you do this to us?

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
This was one of the most annoying things about my ex girlfriend, and I hope I don't ever have to deal with it again.

I'll ask her what she wants to do tonight. She'll say, "I don't know, what do you feel like?" I'll rattle off a long list of things we can do and she methodically rejects every one. Eventually, it'll come down to me asking, "OK, do you just want to hang out at my/your place?" and the response, of course, is "no, I don't feel like it." So I ask her what she wants to do and the response is "I don't know, you pick something."

What the fuck. First of all, you obviously know what you want. You're not telling me, and you expect me to figure it out by myself. A guy's brain is not very complicated, and I'm not trying to solve the little quadruple-reverse psychology jigsaw puzzle that you're setting me up with. I'm just getting angry. Second of all, if I do pick something, you obviously don't want to do it and you're just going to be all pissy when we're out on our date or whatever. This, also, is going to make me extremely angry. Third, if you just plain don't feel like seeing me tonight, TELL ME! In this situation I'm probably NOT going to get upset with you, contrary to what you may believe in your over-analyzing mind. If you tell me this after an hour of arguing with you over what to do, however, that will make me mad. Just tell me right off the bat so I have time to make plans with the guys instead of spending the remainder of my night stewing in my room and reminiscing about how bitchy you can be.

So ladies, if you're ever in this situation, whether you have something in mind or just don't want to see him that night, PLEASE tell him the truth. It will save you both a lot of unnecessary anger. :yes:
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Maybe she wanted you to be a leader and take the initiative - when I used to organise events I used to give people a choice and no one could decide, now I just do whatever I want and they either come or don't, works better this way.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i do this haha sorry!
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    JsTJsT Posts: 18,268 Skive's The Limit
    Every woman I know does this! Does often bug me though!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I don't do that, if there's something i want to do, i'll say so.

    However, it really fucks me off that my boyfriend is incapable of making any decisions without his hand being held, so if i genuinely don't mind what we do, i make him decide. I'm teaching him, really :D
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Because we really don't know what we want?
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Maybe she just didnt feel like doing anything? Of course we all do this :rolleyes:
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yep....think maybe she was sort of 'testing you' and getting you to take the initiative...she might also have hoped you know her well enough to suggest the kind of thing she wanted to do without you having to ask...I also think this is stupid behaviour, though, and think, like you, she should have just been straightforward and not messed you around....can't stand time wasting...:rolleyes:
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    SkiveSkive Posts: 15,286 Skive's The Limit
    That does my head in too. This is the worst one though...

    Me - "Would you lile a cup of Tea"
    Her - "If You Like"

    No, it's not if I like, it's if YOU like, I really couldn't give a fuck if you have a cup of tea or not. :mad:
    Weekender Offender 
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Because I can. :hyper:
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yesss this is ever so annoying. Made worse when they want you to meet them in town or some such during the day, you turn up, then they wander around aimlessly while you 'decide'. By decide, I really mean everything you just said.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Skive wrote: »
    That does my head in too. This is the worst one though...

    Me - "Would you lile a cup of Tea"
    Her - "If You Like"

    No, it's not if I like, it's if YOU like, I really couldn't give a fuck if you have a cup of tea or not. :mad:

    True!! Honestly think that's so rude....nice enough of you to offer to make a cup of tea..she doesn't need to make it into some grumpy, moody game-playing thing!! It's JUST A CUP OF TEA!!

    I know I AM one, but honestly, sometimes, girls....:rolleyes:
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    My ex was like this.

    Say it was summer and quite warm. End up going for a long walk or something. Do you want to sit on the beach? No. Do you want me to buy you an ice cream? No. Do you want to sit and read your book? No. What's wrong? NOTHING! Then it's silence for the rest of the walk ;(
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    The most annoying thing by far is:

    me: Do you want to do this? or this?
    her: yes.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You can waste a full tank of petrol if you ever put a girl in charge of what you're going to do. I've learned the hard way that it's best to just say "I thought we'd go here." But even then you get, "Oh, I don't really fancy that," followed by, "okay, well what do you want to do then?" "I don't really know." :mad:
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Skive wrote: »
    That does my head in too. This is the worst one though...

    Me - "Would you lile a cup of Tea"
    Her - "If You Like"

    No, it's not if I like, it's if YOU like, I really couldn't give a fuck if you have a cup of tea or not. :mad:

    Hahaha, that reminds me of my ex SO much!

    I guess indecision is just part of a woman's psychology. It is fucking frustrating at times though.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You can waste a full tank of petrol if you ever put a girl in charge of what you're going to do. I've learned the hard way that it's best to just say "I thought we'd go here." But even then you get, "Oh, I don't really fancy that," followed by, "okay, well what do you want to do then?" "I don't really know." :mad:

    I do that all the time, my ex drove us 60 miles around Bristol while we argued about where we were gonna go. In the end we just drove about then went home :lol:
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I think it comes from the fact that 9 times out of 10 blokes will sulk if we suggest doing something girly and fun for us, so we say we don't mind and leave it to them so we get a quieter life. :lol:
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    At least it's entertaining. But I can see the point being made.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Skive wrote: »
    That does my head in too. This is the worst one though...

    Me - "Would you lile a cup of Tea"
    Her - "If You Like"

    No, it's not if I like, it's if YOU like, I really couldn't give a fuck if you have a cup of tea or not. :mad:

    mate. blokes do this too- trust! like make up you rmind or get the fuck outta my mutherfucking house punk! yes, I get mad at indecision. But, if it's me, then I am just being cute, of course! lol
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    JsTJsT Posts: 18,268 Skive's The Limit
    icey wrote: »
    The most annoying thing by far is:

    me: Do you want to do this? or this?
    her: yes.
    Makes my blood boil!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Kazbo wrote: »
    I think it comes from the fact that 9 times out of 10 blokes will sulk if we suggest doing something girly and fun for us, so we say we don't mind and leave it to them so we get a quieter life. :lol:

    No, but you don't... you both end up in a sulk. :yeees:

    The difference is the guy is usually thinging "Oooo, what can be both enjoy so she doesn't get in a sulk?", and you're usually thinking "What would *I* enjoy, but won't suggest?" :yeees:

    Trust me, it's 99.9% of the time the bloke who is looking for the quieter life. Check the "What do girls really want thread" and "What to boys really want" thread for proof. Note the difference.


    :yeees:
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Oh - but had to add seperately... I HATE faffing (fucking around, to the less Northern educated). Does my tree in. If you want something, fuckng say it. If you don't, fucking say it. I know I always do - although there is always pixie dust/flowers/pretty things in the air so you don't get upset :yeees:



    :D
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    g_angel007 wrote: »
    No, but you don't... you both end up in a sulk. :yeees:

    The difference is the guy is usually thinging "Oooo, what can be both enjoy so she doesn't get in a sulk?", and you're usually thinking "What would *I* enjoy, but won't suggest?" :yeees:

    Trust me, it's 99.9% of the time the bloke who is looking for the quieter life. Check the "What do girls really want thread" and "What to boys really want" thread for proof. Note the difference.


    :yeees:

    :no: But then I normally don't give a damn what we do. As long as I'm with him I be happy. So generally if I really want/don't want to do something I say, otherwise I leave it to him.

    Plus I think blokes don't really know what they want and thats half the reason behind the difference between those 2 threads. Had this discussion with a few of my male mates last night and they agreed. Blokes think all they want is an easy life blah blah, but when it comes down to it they are just as fussy. Look at the replies we give, I don't think there's any bloke who wouldn't want a female who was caring, considerate, trustworthy and all the rest of the things females say. Perhaps if blokes realised and looked for those qualities as well relationships would work better. :D
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I can never make up my mind about anything; it's a running joke with my family and friends that I wear clothes on a rotational basis so that I don't have to choose! There are many other examples though.

    I'm also with a guy who has the same indecision problems as me so nights out can be very entertaining .... not for us but for passers by!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    More like women are incapable of just thinking logically and picking something.

    no, sometimes we just dont know what we feel like doing and would like the bloke to pick!

    why over analyse? :rolleyes:
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Ignore MattLiverpool, he thinks that women who are raped are sluts.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    More like women are incapable of just thinking logically and picking something. While the man is weighing up where the best place to go is, the women is wondering if he's going to lead her and tell her where they are going to go tonight.

    wtf? but then again, it's what we've come to expect of you
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    A guy's brain is not very complicated, and I'm not trying to solve the little quadruple-reverse psychology jigsaw puzzle that you're setting me up with.

    potw, seriously...
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Sofie wrote: »
    Because we really don't know what we want?
    And of course because we are all the same, obviously. :rolleyes:

    What the hell is this, the broad generalisation thread?
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    actually in my relationship its my boyfriend who can never make up his mind about anything its excesively annoying when we go to the supermarket to buy lunch beacuse he'll jus wander around saying "i duno what i want" until i chose something for him an then other time when i make a decision he'll get all annoyed cos i didnt consult him! well whats the point when the only response ill get is "i dont mind" grrr!

    the thing that really pisses me off though is my friend whenever i ask her something like "do you want a drink?" she'll always answer with "do you want a drink?" its so irritating cos all i want is a strait answer she does it with anything she can never make up her mind till she knows what everyone else wants, i know its cos she wants to make everyone else happy but its so damn annoying!
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