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Can I Trust Him In Amsterdam

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  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    g_angel007 wrote: »
    You miss the point - 'the rule' *is* used by both sexes, not just guys and so your point is pretty much invalid.

    I've heard of it but have never known anyone to actually use it. It's not a rule I would actually use - yes, I wouldn't want my boyfriend to know my every move when I'm away from him, but y'know.
    Anyway, as for trusting this bloke in Amsterdam... the Amsterdam part is irrelevant. You can either trust him... or you can't.

    Of course.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    g_angel007 wrote: »
    Oh, and was the pussy comment directed at me?
    Anyone who plans to cheat on their partner and hide it from them (and then goes through with it). By hide it, I mean making out that they're completely faithful, rather than simply not telling them every little detail. If you've got any backbone whatsoever, your partner will know your attitudes to this sort of thing (if not every little detail of your actions - I reckon most people wouldn't want to know that). Only you know whether this applies to you or not (I'd guess not based on how open you are about this on here, but people can be different in real life).
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru

    If you want to sleep around, you should stay single. I don't think there is ever an excuse for cheating. I think that if you feel tempted to cheat alot, then you clearly aren't happy in your relationship.

    You can be happy in your relationship and still cheat. Yeah it's greedy but why not.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Anyone who plans to cheat on their partner and hide it from them (and then goes through with it). By hide it, I mean making out that they're completely faithful, rather than simply not telling them every little detail. If you've got any backbone whatsoever, your partner will know your attitudes to this sort of thing (if not every little detail of your actions - I reckon most people wouldn't want to know that). Only you know whether this applies to you or not (I'd guess not based on how open you are about this on here, but people can be different in real life).

    ;) Don't you worry - I'm the same in real life. ... no, it doesn't apply. :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Fair enough if your girlfriend knows you have this attitude and accepts it, but going behind her back about it is completely shitty. Grow a pair of balls you pussy.
    :yippe: :thumb:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    So many of you have such a rose tinted view of relationships.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Lacy wrote: »
    So many of you have such a rose tinted view of relationships.

    Because we wouldn't go out with someone who cheats?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Lacy wrote: »
    You can be happy in your relationship and still cheat. Yeah it's greedy but why not.

    Lacy the thing is (as I see it), you can be happy in your relationship and still cheat. The other person has to either live on in blissful ignorance being rendered a total mug and "the last to know" by their partner's utter absence of a spine... or ends up being deeply hurt as and when they do find out.

    What you can be is both be happy in your relationship and still sleep with other people. But that is about as far removed from cheating as it gets. That is done with mutual consent and without making the person you're supposed to care about look like a stupid cunt :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    If you want to sleep around in a relationship then swing, if that's not an option then don't be in a realtionship. This attitude of what happens on holiday stays on holiday seems to be a way of staying somewhat ignorrant to the whole thing. It still happened, whether or not your partner finds out. Just because they don't find out doesn't mean it's ok and 'doesn't count'. It's spineless as far as i'm concerned.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    briggi wrote: »
    Lacy the thing is (as I see it), you can be happy in your relationship and still cheat. The other person has to either live on in blissful ignorance being rendered a total mug and "the last to know" by their partner's utter absence of a spine... or ends up being deeply hurt as and when they do find out.

    What you can be is both be happy in your relationship and still sleep with other people. But that is about as far removed from cheating as it gets. That is done with mutual consent and without making the person you're supposed to care about look like a stupid cunt :)


    Lol well i do both, and i find it very hard to believe that someone could be that hurt by someone cheating on them.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Lacy wrote: »
    Lol well i do both, and i find it very hard to believe that someone could be that hurt by someone cheating on them.

    just because you don't see a problem, doesn't mean that others won't be deveastated by it tbh
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Lacy wrote: »
    Lol well i do both, and i find it very hard to believe that someone could be that hurt by someone cheating on them.

    Well, having been someone who has been cheated on, I can tell you, it hurts.

    Most people I know who have been cheated on have been hurt too.

    Infact, I don't know anyone who hasn't been hurt when they've been cheated on.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Ballerina wrote: »
    just because you don't see a problem, doesn't mean that others won't be deveastated by it tbh

    Yeah but i've had people cheat on me and ok it's bad but it ain't that bad! Some people wanna toughen up a bit.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Lacy wrote: »
    Yeah but i've had people cheat on me and ok it's bad but it ain't that bad! Some people wanna toughen up a bit.

    but just because you're not bothered by it doesn't mean that everyone else should be ok with it. What's to like about an unfaithful partner?
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Ballerina wrote: »
    but just because you're not bothered by it doesn't mean that everyone else should be ok with it. What's to like about an unfaithful partner?

    Lol i never said everyone should be like me, i just don't understand people that aren't like me, same as you don't seem to understand people like me.

    And theres plenty to like about an unfaithful partner. Just depends on how you are as a person.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thanks everyone for all your help.

    Wow. I really cant believe how many people are willing to cheat on their b/f or g/f..

    After reading some of the responses i realised i really dont trust him and after all the problems we've had i think he will cheat, im even considering finishing it before he goes so then he can do what he likes. Cos i just keep thinkin that when his mates all went before a few of them slept with prostitues and there g/f's still dont know about it, even though everybody else knows, and i dont wana be one of the stupid girls that hasnt a clue what their b/f got up to and everyone else knows.
  • Indrid ColdIndrid Cold Warming up? Posts: 16,688
    So do it before he goes.
    Or, only if you're sure you will, don't do it until immediately after he comes back and say something like "I intended to do it before you went anyway, I just wanted you to think you were cheating". :p
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thats the pussys way out. If you break up with him you'd only be doing it because you're scared of getting cheated on not because you actually want to break up with him.
    I suggest you sit down with him and explain about all these fears and hopefully he will be able to put your mind at rest.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Lacy wrote: »
    Yeah but i've had people cheat on me and ok it's bad but it ain't that bad! Some people wanna toughen up a bit.

    sorry for making assumptions but you sound like either have no heart/feelings or you've never met someone you truely love
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    icey wrote: »
    Thats the pussys way out. If you break up with him you'd only be doing it because you're scared of getting cheated on not because you actually want to break up with him.
    I suggest you sit down with him and explain about all these fears and hopefully he will be able to put your mind at rest.

    :yes:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    icey wrote: »
    Thats the pussys way out. If you break up with him you'd only be doing it because you're scared of getting cheated on not because you actually want to break up with him.
    I suggest you sit down with him and explain about all these fears and hopefully he will be able to put your mind at rest.


    I know i should talk to him but everytime i bring it up he says im being stupid and tat he's not gona keep talking about something that might not happen..
    He doesnt understand or care that im feeling insecure and just thinks i want to annoy him'.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    "something that might not happen?" That doesn't sound too sure to me. From what you've posted about what he tells you, it sounds like he's trying to reassure you, but avoid making any promises.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Littleali wrote: »
    sorry for making assumptions but you sound like either have no heart/feelings or you've never met someone you truely love

    Lol well obviously not. Unlike the rest of you it's not my main goal in life to find someone to love. I have better things to be doing :rolleyes:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    If you really are having doubts then break up with him before he goes away.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    cari wrote: »
    Thanks everyone for all your help.

    Wow. I really cant believe how many people are willing to cheat on their b/f or g/f..

    After reading some of the responses i realised i really dont trust him and after all the problems we've had i think he will cheat, im even considering finishing it before he goes so then he can do what he likes. Cos i just keep thinkin that when his mates all went before a few of them slept with prostitues and there g/f's still dont know about it, even though everybody else knows, and i dont wana be one of the stupid girls that hasnt a clue what their b/f got up to and everyone else knows.


    Yeah but do you really not trust him, or do you not trust his mates and therefore don't trust him? If your gonna split up with him just cos you think that being with his mates will make him cheat then thats a bit harsh. If you honestly have never trusted him then probably best to break up or summat.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Lacy wrote: »
    Lol well obviously not. Unlike the rest of you it's not my main goal in life to find someone to love. I have better things to be doing :rolleyes:

    Aww I bet you're a big softy lovey dovey romantic under that cold, hard exterior. :p
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    pill 'ed wrote: »
    Aww I bet you're a big softy lovey dovey romantic under that cold, hard exterior. :p

    I doubt it.

    She is, apparently as I am, evil - and deserves no better............... :yeees:

    I am offering her my trademark 'soft shoulder to cry on'. So far, she is immune :D:lol: :mad: ;)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Lacy wrote: »
    Yeah but do you really not trust him, or do you not trust his mates and therefore don't trust him? If your gonna split up with him just cos you think that being with his mates will make him cheat then thats a bit harsh. If you honestly have never trusted him then probably best to break up or summat.


    I did used to trust him completely till he cheated and i know i cant keep using that cos we decided to give it another go but its hard for me to trust him the way i used to knowing that he did it before.. plus the fact that he wont even try to talk to me about it and put my mind at rest just makes me think he doesnt want to make any promises to me in case he doesn't stick to them.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,324 The Mix Honorary Guru
    No
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