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suicide and rape

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
why dont half of us report our rapes? or sexual abusers? i know for a fact that most people on here who I have read about who have been raped or sexually abused know who did it - so why dont/didnt we report them?

I didnt because I knew him. i knew who he was and I was scared of him i guess. but still - is that really a reason to not report them? surely if we did they'd get locked away and we'd never see them again? And fo course they'd nbever be able to rape or abuse anyone else after they've been arrested? so why didnt any of us do it? or maybe someone who was abused by the same guy previous to our own abuse - why didnt they say anything? do you think its worth saying anything at all - being as thoug most of these guys get out after a couplf of years anyway? surely it just makes it harder for us to live with oursleves, especially after we know they#'re gonna be out in a couple of years., and when they['re out - they'll come looking for the person who put them inside? sorry im pissed.

and suicide... why do our suicide attempts never work??? a lot of us on here ahve tried, but its bnever wokred, only one guys worked and god rest his soul for it, but most of us are here to tell the tale. Whats with that? the three men i know who tried it all successfu;ll;y did it, but everyone else, including myself, who ahve gone for it, its never worked. do you think thats lack of will power, or do you think its some sort of miraculous force brining us back to life and sayinf 'no - its not your turn yet'?

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    i happen to know a fare few people who's suicide attempts have worked. I mean it's not hard, you really have to need to die, not want to.
    so yeah lack of will

    some of the reasons why people don't report our rapes are:
    it's hard to prove
    lack of respect from coppers
    to try and forget
    SHAME
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    There is a saying .. "Suicide is a permenant solution to a temporary problem"

    If people really wanted to kill themselves there are plenty of ways to do it and be certain of the result .. I'd say a lot of attempts are a cry for help.

    I do think if someone does commit suicide they should try not to screw up other people's lives in the process .. my work mate was catching the tube to work, this girl pushed past him, asked him for the time and then jumped infront of the train!! .. It really screwed with his mind!!

    Thinking he was the last person she spoke to .. or that he could have done something to save her ...

    As far as rape goes I kind of think it's one of those crimes where personal revenge is more satifying then the whole police and court thing ...
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by DiamondGeezer

    As far as rape goes I kind of think it's one of those crimes where personal revenge is more satifying then the whole police and court thing ...

    :yes: I agree with this
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I've not been raped but some two of my friends have. Both reported it. In one case the police never caught the men involved, despite people coming forward and giving their names to the police! And in the second case they said there wasn't enough evidence because there was no signs of damaged clothes or severe bruising. This was stupid as she was ill and could hardly move anyway and because he didn't touch her t-shirt and its quite hard to rip jeans. They said it was his word against hers and it would never get to court. I didn't report an attempted rape because I knew fine well the reaction I would get. I still have to deal with him phoning me up and threatening me nearly four years on. I would be upset if he hurt someone else, but the legal system is the guilty party here and I refuse to feel guilty for something THAT WAS NOT MY FAULT
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I didnt report my rape because i didnt want my parents to know, i knew if it got reported theyd find out about it and i didnt want them to be hurt. I alos never wanted to see him again, and knew id have to if i reported it and they found him. I was only 14, dealing with rape was bad enough, but i couldnt deal with everything else too.

    But i have absolutley no idea why my suicide attempt didnt work, it should have. I read up and that to make sure id die. I wasnt found for 10 hours after it happened, so none of the usual treatment could be done, id taken way over double a fatal dose that i remember (and docs did blood tests and said id taken more like 3times fatal) and had a bad liver before hand. It should have worked, but it didnt. My mum says its because ive got a guardian angel. I dont know how true that is, but thinking back now im so glad that it didnt work.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by fugue

    some of the reasons why people don't report our rapes are:

    SHAME

    :yes:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Suicide - Well i lost my dad to this. He had done many attempts of suicide years before but always made sure someone was there to help him once he had done it, so yes this was a cry for help.
    When things turned from bad to worst & he didn't want ot live anymore, he made no way for anyone to know how he was feeling & made sure that this time it worked :(.
    He went somewhere where noone would find him until it was too late. That is the difference, the last time he didn't want help!

    *Hold self together*
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    the reason so many of us survive our suicide attepmts is either:
    1. Someone saves us
    2. we realise that there is something worth living for

    well they were the factors in my case...

    i wasnt raped but someone tried to attack me, i didnt press charges because:
    1. i wanted to get over it and forget
    2. they turned it around to make it sound like i had asked/deserved it...

    so there you go
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    when i attemted suiside i was young and stupid and took the wrong pills......i fort that asprin was the same as paracetamol.....its not. so i was just dizzy for a few days.

    and when i was raped i didnt report it cos i didnt think that people would belive me.
    i was drunk and at first i wanted to fuck this guy but then when he was just about to i chickened out and i told him to stop but he didnt. when he did stop he made me give him head.
    and also he was a mate of one of my best mates and i didnt want to loose my mate.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by fugue
    i happen to know a fare few people who's suicide attempts have worked. I mean it's not hard, you really have to need to die, not want to.
    so yeah lack of will

    some of the reasons why people don't report our rapes are:
    it's hard to prove
    lack of respect from coppers
    to try and forget
    SHAME

    it's all a shame.

    with rape you want to forget so try not to think about it, and with suicide, it's 50-50 chance, ok some purposly do it so it doesn't kill them, but most, just chance that you survive. :rolleyes:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    My greatest shame is attempting suicide......i now realise its without doubt the worst and most selfish thing you could do to your family. The more i think about it the more convinced i am of a divine intervention. I can't understand how i failed. I was ten. I had a gun to my head. I dont remember pulling the trigger but the hole in the wall is evidence enough that it went off. My only 'physical' injury was some damage to my hearing. Its crazy how easy it is to talk yourself into doing such an act. Anytime i hear of anyone committing sucide i feel so guilty........
    As for rape, i don't personally know anybody that has gone through the torment, but if any one ever harmed my mother or my sister like that i know i would try to kill them. The thought alone terrifies me.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Originally posted by KrazyKlown
    I can't understand how i failed.

    I don't know you but i'm glad you failed at it :).
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,328 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Both the guys who attacked/sexually abused my friend were caught, and are in court either today or it might have been yesterday, in fact i think it was yesterday. Anyway my frined said she'd never go to court cos it'd bring everything back, maybe this is the reason?

    The TV has all these drama programs where the lawyers are wankers and they manage to probe so deep the person gets shouted at and starts crying and stuff. Maybe it's because court is such a scary prospect? The defendants have to be there and so do you, they can see you, watch you, it's absolutely horrible. If the guys plead not guilty they may as for me in court, i really don't wanna go, I can't express that enough, but I don't want them to run free so I might have to, hopefully the video evidence will be enough. Either way it could be court, or of course the other reaons such as being scared.
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