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Should i tell him?
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Right,..bear with me. this gets confusing but please read on.
I met someone two weeks ago, he was lovely sent some lovely messages as if he was VERY interested in me. BUT when i told him i had feelings for him he ran a mile! Told me he wouldnt go out with me because of his past relationships - ok thats fine but i AM different! He made me believe we had a future and if he had no intensions of that IT is WRONG!
been speaking to someone who said he texts lovely messages to a lot of people in most counties (being a national represeentative of a youth council - one of the things i dont do) he goes down the pub pulls about 20 every time!
so ok i wouldnt want to go out with him if he was doing this whilst with me!
Another thing tyhough is the fact i will have to work in partnership with him in leos this year i work with him in St John Ambulance (he is very involved with this as he said goin on about how he great - i was talking to someone and he 'voted and elected' himself for the national position so he seems up himself and has already lied - YET I HAVE HUGE FEELINGS FOR HIM - i ruined a possible relationship and friendship for him I feel betrayed and stupid luckily not used!
I want to email him and ask WHY i has treated me like this and that women are not to be treated like object as i dont feel all the people he has hurt and upset in the past have not told him!
I though this male was different i thought bveing a volunteer he may be more like me respectful and nice but NO its alright for people to say you must just go for the bad boys but this one was lovely caring and did more voluntary work like me now i know it wasnt important to him like it was to me but just a way to get women!:(
What do i do ignore him and feel really uncomfortable or let him know and put our friendship (what i have left of it) on the line? I only met him 2 weeks ago but feel i should tell him how i feel it may help but he may laugh more at me - BUT like the other person said he may not think about others feelings and may be hurt to think he has upset someone!:(
I met someone two weeks ago, he was lovely sent some lovely messages as if he was VERY interested in me. BUT when i told him i had feelings for him he ran a mile! Told me he wouldnt go out with me because of his past relationships - ok thats fine but i AM different! He made me believe we had a future and if he had no intensions of that IT is WRONG!
been speaking to someone who said he texts lovely messages to a lot of people in most counties (being a national represeentative of a youth council - one of the things i dont do) he goes down the pub pulls about 20 every time!
so ok i wouldnt want to go out with him if he was doing this whilst with me!
Another thing tyhough is the fact i will have to work in partnership with him in leos this year i work with him in St John Ambulance (he is very involved with this as he said goin on about how he great - i was talking to someone and he 'voted and elected' himself for the national position so he seems up himself and has already lied - YET I HAVE HUGE FEELINGS FOR HIM - i ruined a possible relationship and friendship for him I feel betrayed and stupid luckily not used!
I want to email him and ask WHY i has treated me like this and that women are not to be treated like object as i dont feel all the people he has hurt and upset in the past have not told him!
I though this male was different i thought bveing a volunteer he may be more like me respectful and nice but NO its alright for people to say you must just go for the bad boys but this one was lovely caring and did more voluntary work like me now i know it wasnt important to him like it was to me but just a way to get women!:(
What do i do ignore him and feel really uncomfortable or let him know and put our friendship (what i have left of it) on the line? I only met him 2 weeks ago but feel i should tell him how i feel it may help but he may laugh more at me - BUT like the other person said he may not think about others feelings and may be hurt to think he has upset someone!:(
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Comments
You get together and he'll just play you. Unfortunately it dicks like him that gives us men a bad name.
Try as hard as you can to forget your feelings for him because he isn't good enough for you hun!
You don't want to make things too awkward so you can't work with him, so just try to get on and have a good business relationship.
I rest my case. I thought he was about 16. If at 23 he doesn't realise the harm that he's causing then he is obviously immature. His time will come. He'll fall for someone big time and they'll shit all over him. Then he'll maybe know what it feels like.
Forget him. You deserve and will get better.
he treated me like dirt and now i feel really really awkward!
Sorry I've been in a similar situation and if makes you feel about this small doesn't it? At least you realise that he treated you badly. Don't go chasing after him, he's not worth it. I promise you'll get over the awkwardness and the feeling stupid in good time.
LSS
Why feel awkward? He obviously doesn't give a hoot about you or your feelings. Don't let it or him bother you.
If you stood on a snake that was trying to hurt you would you feel bad? No. Same applies here.
I like that
do you thing it is right to tell him at all?
Either way he can twist what i say - im not a confident person in fact i wouldnt have a clue what to say
I have plenty of them. Comes from my Ninja training. Grasshopper very wise.
Yeah but i cant believe i was STUPID enough to believe he may of actually liked me!
i have thought and thought whether i did something wrong or not - but i mean this person who told me was bitter about his position in St John she said that everyone hates him yet everyone i spoken to in St John really think he is great!
So was she making it up either way he has lead me on when i show interest shat on me! sooo i dont know!
Someone has told me what has happened so i dont know any of these and some live miles away! so looks like im on my own - will get over the anger first! i was thinking along the lines of revenge!
Next time you see him out with a girlie. Walk up. Slap him. Call him a two-timing bastard and storm off. Leave him to explain it to his lady friend.
Oh. Or pour a drink over him in front of all his mates.
U thinking what im thinking i have a number of male friends who are also willing to play along - flirt with him in a night club then 5 other blokes come up flirt with him we argue over him i end up saying well he does like to try it on with NEW people so have him!
Leave him to get rid of them all!
we all have a night out planned for my leo party
Obviously I don't know what he said in his messages but is it possible that you have interpreted some very simple but friendly messages as being something more than they really are?
If so it may just simply be that the strength of you feelings appeared to be too strong a response to his friendliness? and so he backed off.
I wouldn't confront hi in the way you suggest because it may seem to him that you are going over the top. Try to be friends and find out more about him by getting to know him, rather than relying on the tales your friends tell you. That way he may begin to see you as a mature and sensible person.
are you saying that all of the girls he pulls have some how gottem mixed signals too?
you are a great person and i want to go out with you do you like me 2?- 1st day
after soeaking on the fone for an hour with him saying how much he liked me --- you are a lovely person the more we speak and the more i get to know you the more i am starting to like you you are a great person and i really do like you - 3rd day
Before we met - i cant wait to see you i have missed you so much
same sort of messages would i be boyfriend material - to which i replied of course
do you like me 2? - i replied yes!
many along these lines would this give you or anyone else herethe impression that someone is interested unless tyou are weird and feel that everyone is taking you for a bloody ride!
THE SIGNALS I GOT WERE CLEAR - from what i have heard and from what someone has said from experience he has been able to send lovely texts - yet not actually be interested wta im saying is that i feel hurt and am not inthe mood for someone to say that i am making it up
From looking at the messages i start to believe AGAIN that he may have some feelings - but as soon as i showed i was interested was treated like dirt!
Well yes obviously - its not just 1 i have heard this from its many that have been treated like it!
Don't stress about it, the faults with him not you. He obviously is very insecure and lacks the ability to commit to one girl. Move on and find someone who will treat you properly.
*claps*
Well said kevlar.