Breakup

Verity · December 7

Hey @LolaPumpkin13 It's great to hear that you spoke with Shout but it's a shame you felt that you weren't being listened to. Do you know if you felt this way because you weren't getting a response or maybe you felt you were heard but not understood?

LolaPumpkin13 · December 8

Probably not understood

LolaPumpkin13 · December 8

I just don’t want to go through the pain anymore

LolaPumpkin13 · December 8

Even in the relationship I went to doctors they told me to to go to vitalminds I did and I got told because it isn’t depression or anxiety they can’t help but told me to go to heart to hear counselling which I did but now I’m here by myself

LolaPumpkin13 · December 9

i cant forget like nothing happened

LolaPumpkin13 · December 9

i broke up with him because of the thoughts and to get help with the thoughts but i havent got the help

LolaPumpkin13 · December 10

I’ve asked for help but nothing

Verity · December 11

Hey @LolaPumpkin13 I can see you have been struggling over the past few days, it's great that you are using the community for support, we are here for you and you are not alone. You mentioned you tried heart to hear counselling, if you don't mind sharing, how did that go?

Sian321 · December 12

Hey @LolaPumpkin13 , I just wanted to post here to say that it sounds extremely tough coping with these thoughts, and you're doing so well to keep reaching out for help. I get the sense that these last few weeks have felt very isolating for you - you're trying to get help, but don't feel listened to or heard. Did you have your first counselling session? That sounds like a potential positive step, and I really hope you can find that 1:1 support you're looking for very soon.

When the thoughts get loud in your mind, what kind of things do they say?

We're listening, and thank you again for your trust in opening up about this.

LolaPumpkin13 · December 13

I’m just kind of reflecting the situation and what happened and just wondering we that happen again

LolaPumpkin13 · December 13

I want to move on but I don’t at the same time

Verity · December 13

Hey @LolaPumpkin13 it's great that you are taking time to reflect, this is a really important part of navigating a breakup, especially while emotions are still fresh. Do you feel it has gotten easier or harder to manage how you feel? you mentioned you do/don't want to move on, it is completely normal to feel this way when you still might be emotionally attached to someone but no longer together, you are not alone in this, what's best is the outcome that is healthy for both of you, one of the hardest parts of realationships is knowing when is best to say goodbye.

LolaPumpkin13 · December 13

I think because I’ve been called many so many things it has made me doubt myself and so much happened that I don’t want it to happen again and just trusting someone with everything again

LolaPumpkin13 · December 13

I’m just so tired

LolaPumpkin13 · December 13

I just feel like you can’t get the help especially the ones who are trying to take accountability

LolaPumpkin13 · December 16

I’m just so tired

Verity · December 16

Hey @LolaPumpkin13 it's understandable that being called things that may be hurtful can leave you doubting yourself, I'm sorry you went through this. Even when you are trying to reflect or grow, self doubt can creep in when peopele have used hurtful or negagtive words to describe your character, especially when you feel emotionally drained, but those words don't need to be who you are.

I understand that you want to protect yourself from going through something like this again. Trust isn't something we can rush or force, it' okay if that feels frightening right now. Hesitatinig to 'move on' can just mean you have learned something about how deeply you can be affected. It sounds like you are carrying a lot of emotions, this can be really tireing, it's a lot to handle for anyone.

When you say you 'can't get the help especially the ones who are trying to take accountability' do you mean you don't feel that you are getting the support you need?

LolaPumpkin13 · December 16

Yh I don’t think I’m getting the support I need

Breakup

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