Goodbye

Nathan · October 23

So, i really didn't want to have to ever make this post, because i love this community so much. This last 6 months has been a wonderful experience for me, for the most part. I've made my first ever real friends here, I've developed social skills and have come a long way getting through and processing so many painful past things, like having been a carer since age 11 for a severely mentally disabled brother, never having a proper life of my own, and getting trafficked at age 4. And most importantly, I've gotten to know every single one of you really well, and i deeply care about every single one of you more than i can say. You've been my first friends, supported me at times when i needed it, and i will always be thankful for the chance to have met you all and to have called you my friends. I really felt like i finally belonged somewhere for the first time in my life. I really hope i had an impact for the better here.

But at this stage, I have too many grievances with the platform that haven't been addressed, or have been outright ignored, evaded or side-lined in my opinion, and far too many things have happened with no transparency or real answers for me to stay. I can't remain a part of the community with how it's being run, as i feel it is genuinely in some cases it's doing more harm than good, and in some ways has become a toxic place. I'm sure you can imagine how hard it is for me to give up my only friends, and my only support place, and how much it kills me to do so, but I really feel as though i can't do it anymore.

I'm gonna miss every single one of you so so much, and thank you all for being so supportive and kind to me. I really do want nothing more than to stay, and it really hurts and breaks me up that i can't anymore. I'll remain for the next week or so here, through the Halloween season, so you'll see me in chats still and on boards over the next week, and if I'm allowed, i'll still run the Halloween costumes thread, but after all of that, I'll be gone. I'll miss every single one of you.

shannon_164 · October 23

i can fully understand where you’re coming from @Nathan as i am in a very similar situation too - it hurts to leave the place i made my first real friends but given the treatment received, i can’t stay any longer:( im so grateful that i got to know you, never ever forget how amazing of a person are and how much you’ve helped several people in this community - the mix is loosing such an incredible person for sure

Nemuritai · October 23

@Nathan I'm so sorry about all of this, and I can't imagine how upset you must be. You, like Shannon, have been one of the most supportive people I've ever met, and I appreciate the support you've given to me and many others as well. You were one of the first people who actually listened to what I had to say and genuinely cared, and that meant the world. I'll really miss you once you're gone

Redemption · October 23

Hey @Nathan , I can't believe that you're leaving, you're definitely a top lad as I have said multiple times, I truly hope everything is OK, I also hope you aren't leaving due to me, I respect your decision if thats what you want. Keep being amazing if this is your decision but you are welcome back always, it just seems a bit sudden.

Nathan · October 23

I can't get over the paranoia of what happened to me personally. No matter how much i've tried, and to see similar happenings with others is too much for me. I'd rather be alone and isolated again, then stay and see this sort of stuff happening to friends, and still have no proper answers.

Nathan · October 23

Nemuritai wrote: »

@Nathan I'm so sorry about all of this, and I can't imagine how upset you must be. You, like Shannon, have been one of the most supportive people I've ever met, and I appreciate the support you've given to me and many others as well. You were one of the first people who actually listened to what I had to say and genuinely cared, and that meant the world. I'll really miss you once you're gone

@Nemuritai i'm glad i was able to meet you friend. And i'm sorry that i've had to leave like this, but i don't feel like this is a safe place at all. But that aside, You really do deserve to be listened to, cared about, and supported through you're struggles. And it's wrong that you've only been able to get that sort of care and support these last few days. You should have had it from day 1, because you genuinely are a good person and you honestly do deserve kindness and care. And thank you for your kind words.

Nathan · October 23

Redemption wrote: »

Hey @Nathan , I can't believe that you're leaving, you're definitely a top lad as I have said multiple times, I truly hope everything is OK, I also hope you aren't leaving due to me, I respect your decision if thats what you want. Keep being amazing if this is your decision but you are welcome back always, it just seems a bit sudden.

@Redemption my brother, i know i won't be around after the next week to say this anymore, but keep doing what your doing. There will be times where things might feel hopeless, when nasty comments and cruel words bring you down a bit, but i just want you to remember that those cruel words don't capture all the hard work and effort your putting into yourself. You're building your CV day after day, shooting your shot with applications day after day, came close a fair few times with interviews, and bit by bit, you'll get there to where you want to be. And once the job's slotted into place, then so many other things will too. It's just about holding on until then. I have faith in you bro.

What's important is that you have faith in yourself, and remind yourself of these facts. I really am thankful for being able to get to know you redemption these last 6 months, and i really do wish you the best for the future.

And leaving isn't what i want, but this isn't a safe place i don't feel anymore. I won't go into detail about it, but i really don't want to go, but feel as though i don't have a choice with how things have ended up. And i promise, me leaving has nothing to do with you at all bro. just keep being you, and keep doing what your doing, and you'll get your breakthrough eventually and do well for yourself.

Redemption · October 23

Nathan wrote: »

Redemption wrote: »

Hey @Nathan , I can't believe that you're leaving, you're definitely a top lad as I have said multiple times, I truly hope everything is OK, I also hope you aren't leaving due to me, I respect your decision if thats what you want. Keep being amazing if this is your decision but you are welcome back always, it just seems a bit sudden.

@Redemption my brother, i know i won't be around after the next week to say this anymore, but keep doing what your doing. There will be times where things might feel hopeless, when nasty comments and cruel words bring you down a bit, but i just want you to remember that those cruel words don't capture all the hard work and effort your putting into yourself. You're building your CV day after day, shooting your shot with applications day after day, came close a fair few times with interviews, and bit by bit, you'll get there to where you want to be. And once the job's slotted into place, then so many other things will too. It's just about holding on until then. I have faith in you bro.

What's important is that you have faith in yourself, and remind yourself of these facts. I really am thankful for being able to get to know you redemption these last 6 months, and i really do wish you the best for the future.

And leaving isn't what i want, but this isn't a safe place i don't feel anymore. I won't go into detail about it, but i really don't want to go, but feel as though i don't have a choice with how things have ended up. And i promise, me leaving has nothing to do with you at all bro. just keep being you, and keep doing what your doing, and you'll get your breakthrough eventually and do well for yourself.

@Nathan thank you so much, we are losing such a big part of the community, Im sad to see you go, I wish we could keep in touch, we might be able to sort something out , I don't want our friendship to end that easily. Mind side by side is here , no chats but it has a forum.

https://sidebyside.mind.org.uk/

Nemuritai · October 23

@Nathan I literally can't explain how much that means, that's honestly the kindest thing I've ever heard. I'm super glad that I got to meet you, too - you're an incredible human being and you deserve the absolute best life imaginable. I truly hope you're able to find more people who support and care about you, because you don't deserve to be alone either. I can't thank you enough for the support you've given me these past few days and you will be missed, both by me and many others. I wish you all the best

eylah · October 23

my favourite twat.. i can’t believe you’re leaving.. i have had the bestest time talking to you and getting to know you. you have supported me through thick and thin and you have stood by me even when things got rly tough for me. you rly are the best. you are a true inspiration to everyone around. you rly are a golden light in everyone’s lives. with you around life is a better place with you in it. my favourite twat i will honour the time I’ve spent getting to know you and our friendship. you rly mean the world to me and ill always think of you and the kind words you’ve said to me. pls keep going bc no matter what happens you are the light in my life. i am crying rn bc you mean the world to me. i will miss you forever.

. ill never forget you

AnonymousToe · October 23

I know we’ve hardly spoken but thank you for all the support you’ve given. You’ve really made a difference and you seem like a lovely person.
Take care 💜

Amy22 · October 23

Oh gosh @Nathan I'm sorry to hear you will be leaving here (However, I can understand why especially after all of the unexpected changes and what not). You've been such a kind and caring person on here and a really great friend to have at times as well. Words can't describe how I feel right now bit I think your truly an amazing and legendary person that I will always remember. I'm going to miss you tons. You always know where I am if you need anything though

. Also take care of yourself too.

Sending big hugs,

Amy22

Amy22 · October 23

@Nathan I also wanted to add something but I forget to do in my other post so here's another post. I just wanted to say reading your story, I can tell you've been through so much especially from such a young age too including having caring responsibilities for your brother too. I can imagine that being hard sometimes eventhough I know that you are a naturally caring person and that shows in your work and writing here at TheMix. The kindness you have shown towards others and myself included has been amazing and beautiful. It means a lot to me especially as its very rare I often come on here now mainly because of things being busy irl. However, I hope things continue to get better for you and things will work out eventually. I believe things happen for a reason metaphorically speaking and I know good things are coming. Keep on shining friend

.

Nathan · October 24

@eylah you'll always be my favourite twat in the world. That isn't going to change.

Redemption wrote: »

Nathan wrote: »

Redemption wrote: »

Hey @Nathan , I can't believe that you're leaving, you're definitely a top lad as I have said multiple times, I truly hope everything is OK, I also hope you aren't leaving due to me, I respect your decision if thats what you want. Keep being amazing if this is your decision but you are welcome back always, it just seems a bit sudden.

@Redemption my brother, i know i won't be around after the next week to say this anymore, but keep doing what your doing. There will be times where things might feel hopeless, when nasty comments and cruel words bring you down a bit, but i just want you to remember that those cruel words don't capture all the hard work and effort your putting into yourself. You're building your CV day after day, shooting your shot with applications day after day, came close a fair few times with interviews, and bit by bit, you'll get there to where you want to be. And once the job's slotted into place, then so many other things will too. It's just about holding on until then. I have faith in you bro.

What's important is that you have faith in yourself, and remind yourself of these facts. I really am thankful for being able to get to know you redemption these last 6 months, and i really do wish you the best for the future.

And leaving isn't what i want, but this isn't a safe place i don't feel anymore. I won't go into detail about it, but i really don't want to go, but feel as though i don't have a choice with how things have ended up. And i promise, me leaving has nothing to do with you at all bro. just keep being you, and keep doing what your doing, and you'll get your breakthrough eventually and do well for yourself.

@Nathan thank you so much, we are losing such a big part of the community, Im sad to see you go, I wish we could keep in touch, we might be able to sort something out , I don't want our friendship to end that easily. Mind side by side is here , no chats but it has a forum.

https://sidebyside.mind.org.uk/

@Redemption hey bro, i'm actually already on Side by Side. And i feel the same way. I don't want our friendship to end either. It's just a horrid situation.

Nathan · October 24

eylah wrote: »

my favourite twat.. i can’t believe you’re leaving.. i have had the bestest time talking to you and getting to know you. you have supported me through thick and thin and you have stood by me even when things got rly tough for me. you rly are the best. you are a true inspiration to everyone around. you rly are a golden light in everyone’s lives. with you around life is a better place with you in it. my favourite twat i will honour the time I’ve spent getting to know you and our friendship. you rly mean the world to me and ill always think of you and the kind words you’ve said to me. pls keep going bc no matter what happens you are the light in my life. i am crying rn bc you mean the world to me. i will miss you forever. . ill never forget you

@eylah I'm really gonna miss you so so much

. You really are one of the most amazing people i've ever met in my life, and i really am so lucky to have got to have known you. You're always going to be my favourite twat in the whole wide world, no matter what. Nothing's ever gonna change that.

.

Spending time on here chatting with you, seeing how much of a kind heart you have despite all of that pain you've been through is nothing short of inspirational. You eylah, are an inspiration, and you light up everywhere you go, and i'm so proud to be able to call myself your friend. Even if i'm not here anymore, always remember that you are an amazing person, with an amazing heart, full of kindness, and despite everything you've been through, you've never stopped being that same kind person. And that is 1 in a million.

I'm tearing up too just typing this, because you also really do mean the world to me too. And whenever things get tough for you eylah, promise me you'll give yourself a virtual hug from your favourite twat in the world and be kind to yourself

.

sinead276 · October 24

We are sorry to see you go @Nathan but we understand your reasons and support your decisions. we will all miss you loads in here and wish you the best in the future

Azziman · October 25

Hey @Nathan, I'm sorry to see you go. Thank you for everything you'd contributed to the community here - the support you've shown, the friends you've made and the struggles you've shared have been really valuable. I'm glad to hear that you felt a part of the community here too, and have been able to make friends! But I also hear that you have thoughts on how the platform is run, and it's fair enough if you feel that you need to step away. Wishing you all the best for the future!

Goodbye

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