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Redemption
Community Connector Posts: 5,546 Part of The Furniture
Im sorry to keep posting, I wanted to not post in maybe a small while just to get used to other services and maybe get practice when I do eventually age out of here but I thought I needed to vent, I guess Ill just do it for now. So, my family think I’m doing fuck all to change my situation. I’m currently doing a course to help me get into work. It is about learning interview skills, applying to jobs, and things like that, and they might even have access to jobs too, but my family act like I’m not trying. My family was lecturing me about it while I was on this chat. I’ve had interviews at Tesco, Argos, World Duty Free, Zara, TK Maxx, M&S, and Legoland, yet I keep getting declined, rejected, or ignored. They act like I sit at home gaming all day and never do anything about my situation. Sometimes I feel okay or fine, then they come home from work or come into my room and lecture me about all of this. It’s important not to compare myself to other people, but they literally do it to me.
I’ve done courses, I’m currently doing a course, I’ve been to several interviews, I’m seeing someone tomorrow about jobs, and I’m constantly applying, yet it’s still not enough for them. I honestly don’t know what they want me to do, and even when I probably get a job, it still won’t be enough for them. I sometimes feel shit as it is, and then they say stuff that makes it worse. I know I’ve been rejected and not always made the right decisions, but I’m trying to improve. I know I’m not in work, and I think about that 24/7 pretty much literally. It plays on my mind, yet to them it’s like I just want to be like this and sit on games all day. They might not know I struggle to this extent, but it’s possible they do. I have had counselling, and they have mentioned a few times that I seem withdrawn and depressed, and if I’m happy, they say it’s the first time they have seen me happy for a long time. I think what the issue is, is that other people's journeys are smoother and like their own journeys. They compare themselves and other people who have jobs to me. In general, they can be pretty hectic. Its hard because its tough as it is and like I don't feel credited for my efforts.
I’ve done courses, I’m currently doing a course, I’ve been to several interviews, I’m seeing someone tomorrow about jobs, and I’m constantly applying, yet it’s still not enough for them. I honestly don’t know what they want me to do, and even when I probably get a job, it still won’t be enough for them. I sometimes feel shit as it is, and then they say stuff that makes it worse. I know I’ve been rejected and not always made the right decisions, but I’m trying to improve. I know I’m not in work, and I think about that 24/7 pretty much literally. It plays on my mind, yet to them it’s like I just want to be like this and sit on games all day. They might not know I struggle to this extent, but it’s possible they do. I have had counselling, and they have mentioned a few times that I seem withdrawn and depressed, and if I’m happy, they say it’s the first time they have seen me happy for a long time. I think what the issue is, is that other people's journeys are smoother and like their own journeys. They compare themselves and other people who have jobs to me. In general, they can be pretty hectic. Its hard because its tough as it is and like I don't feel credited for my efforts.
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Comments
so, your family might not care enough to look at what you're doing to better your situation, but we all see it on here redemption. All the effort your putting in, all the interviews you've done, all the courses you've gone on to get closer to employment, the volunteering, and all the heartache from not being able to overcome the stigma of one opportunity overnight, which is impossible to do really btw in such a short space of time. We all see it, and we know your trying, and you'll always get credit for that here. And if your family wants to ignore all that, there isn't anything you can do to make them see reason, so the only other thing to do is ignore the bullshit they come out with around it, and try and reassure yourself of those points and the fact that you know you are trying your very best. I know it's no consolation, and it's awful to be going through that, but that's all i can suggest.
Thank you so much @DonnerKebab I really appreciate all of that.
Have you tried talking to someone in your family about the impact that their comments are having on you? They might see you with a low mood, and might not appreciate how hurtful their comments are. If there's someone in the family that you think might be receptive to hear you out, would you consider speaking to them about your experience, the comments you're getting, and how it makes you feel?
It's easy to say that you shouldn't compare yourself to others when people are you are doing it to you, and it might not be possible to stop them saying this. Keep focusing on the good work you're doing and the effort you're making, because that's the action that'll take you closer to getting that job, and hopefully that opportunity will come good for you soon. We're here to support you through this!