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Losing friends

AnonymousToeAnonymousToe Posts: 2,753 Boards Guru
in Health & Wellbeing
Every irl friendship I’ve ever had (except one right now) has kind of just ended abruptly with no explanation. People just move on and replace me with someone better, then forget about me. I gave up in the end and had no friends for about 5 years. But now I have a friend again and I wish I wasn’t so worried about losing her. It sounds so stupid. I’m meant to be an adult and I feel like I’m 13 losing all my friends again. I dont know if it’s because I’m autistic, or don’t talk enough, or because I didn’t want to use social media at 12/13, but they all kind of stopped talking to me after one summer. I dont know why it still bothers me now.

My friend now is so sweet and we’re much more alike and we just gel better than any friendship I’ve had before. I wish I wasn’t constantly worried that she’s about to get fed up and move on. And I really hope she can’t tell I feel like that.
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Comments

  • 63marie63marie Posts: 66 Boards Initiate
    Hey @AnonymousToe, I'm so sorry you're feeling like this. I'm also autistic and have really struggled with friendships and had similar worries to you, so I can understand how overwhelming it can be. You deserve to have good friends and to feel appreciated and supported by them! I'm really glad you've got a good friend now and that you have a lot in common. I can totally understand your worries. From my experience, it's helped to tell my friends how I'm feeling, as most of the time they are feeling the same way, or if not, they can reassure me it's not the case, but I also understand you not wanting to open up because it can feel really scary. We're here to listen and support you if you need to chat <3
  • AzzimanAzziman Discussion Boards Moderator Posts: 2,399 Boards Champion
    edited September 17
    Hi @AnonymousToe, I'm sorry to hear what you've been through. Losing a friend is painful, but losing a friend suddenly without any explanation hurts more because of the lack of closure. That lack of closure can mean that it feels like an unfinished chapter, where you're still seeking for that nice neat ending.

    Your feelings are valid, and it makes sense that after experiencing people walking out on you, that you'd be fearful of it happening again with your current friend. I'm glad that you have a friend that you get on with and gel well with, that's lovely to hear! I hope that you two can stay as good friends, and that in time it'll help you to feel a little less afraid about losing your close friends. We're here to listen to you.
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