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Didn't to to volunteering today
Redemption
Community Connector Posts: 4,591 The Mix Elder
I didn’t go to my volunteering today, and I’ve missed a few times recently because of bank holidays, appointments, and other things going on. I feel a bit guilty, but the truth is I don’t enjoy it at all. It doesn’t feel like it’s helping me, and not getting paid makes it hard to stay motivated. Last time I went, I had just been rejected from a placement I really wanted and couldn’t stop thinking about how I could have been working in a paid role by now. Volunteering was supposed to be a short-term step at the start of the year, but now it’s June and I’m still in the same position. I’ve been told I’m a hard worker, but they also said I wasn’t suitable for tills which knocked my confidence. I’ve ended up just steaming clothes each week and it’s boring. I don’t feel like I’m gaining experience that will help me get a job. Even though I know paid work can be repetitive too, at least there’s a financial reward that makes it feel worth it.
On a brighter note, I’m starting a confidence course tomorrow that runs four days a week for the next few weeks. That makes me feel a bit better because I’ll be getting out, doing something productive, and meeting people in similar situations. I often feel like everyone else is doing better than me, not just people my age but younger and older too, and it makes me feel inferior and like I’ve fallen behind. I’m not jealous though because I truly believe I’ll get there too. That belief is what keeps me going. I still have dreams like buying a house, getting a new car, meeting someone, maybe getting married one day, even going on a cruise which is something I’ve been thinking about a lot recently. These goals remind me that this situation won’t last forever. Even though it’s been a long and difficult time, I’m holding on to the belief that it’s temporary. That belief and continuing to open up about how I feel are the two main things helping me through it.
On a brighter note, I’m starting a confidence course tomorrow that runs four days a week for the next few weeks. That makes me feel a bit better because I’ll be getting out, doing something productive, and meeting people in similar situations. I often feel like everyone else is doing better than me, not just people my age but younger and older too, and it makes me feel inferior and like I’ve fallen behind. I’m not jealous though because I truly believe I’ll get there too. That belief is what keeps me going. I still have dreams like buying a house, getting a new car, meeting someone, maybe getting married one day, even going on a cruise which is something I’ve been thinking about a lot recently. These goals remind me that this situation won’t last forever. Even though it’s been a long and difficult time, I’m holding on to the belief that it’s temporary. That belief and continuing to open up about how I feel are the two main things helping me through it.
Post edited by Redemption on
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Comments
On the volunteering, I can hear how this situation isn't ideal for you (not enjoying the placement due to lack of payment, progress and trust in managing tills), or the charity (missed shifts can cause them a big headache!). How do you feel about carrying on with the volunteering placement, given the situation? We're here to listen to you.
@Azziman hey thanks so much for your reply. I hope I've not caused them too much of a headache. Tbh I'm not sure what's next in terms of carrying on , I don't know what to do literally, I could carry on like a course but it's Tuesday to Friday so I could potentially go on Monday but im not sure honestly if I want to go or focus on my course. Anyway cheers Azziman.