Why I'm a failure

I failed academically in school.

I failed at forklift driving.

I'm in my 20s and not working yet.

No girlfriend and never been in a relationship.

Still a virgin.

Not many friends.

I'm lazy.

Not good at anything.

And there are probably many more.

It's just that most of my friends and other people are doing better than me: they have careers ahead and are doing better than me, and I'm just here failing. I do have goals I would like to achieve, but I feel like I will never achieve them.

I think I am trying hard to get into work; it's just stressful. I think once I get into work, some things I don't have will hopefully just fall into place a bit. I've been struggling with this for a very long time, I find it hard to speak out like go GP or speak to people in person or anything so that's why I have to post on here all the time.

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Former Member

I'm here for you

You have been having such a difficult time, and I'm sorry that you have started to doubt yourself and your capabilities. It can feel disheartening when you have been trying hard for so long, but it doesn't feel as if you are succeeding.

But even though you didn't manage to pass at some things, that could just mean you haven't found the *thing* that's for you! You could honestly be one more job application away from landing your dream job, and you could be so close to a horizon of opportunities opening up to you. And it might not mean much coming from me, but each time we have had a discussion on here you have been very articulate, and in no way does it come across as if you are unintelligent or a failure.

I hope you don't mind, but I wanted to give you an alternative perspective on something. You said that you hadn't ever been in a relationship, but I don't think that is bad at all. I think there is a huge proportion of women that would rather a man to have never been in one, than to have tonnes of experience. I know that you might have been talking about it in terms of the loneliness that comes with being single, but perhaps that will be a beneficial when you do get a partner- and it will be a healthier relationship as a result. Many women will even prefer that you are a virgin, as it means that they won't have to feel any jealousy, but also it suggests that you are a loyal man that doesn't just have sex with anyone that he lays his eyes on- and that is such a noble quality to have these days.

And I know how stressful it is for you right now, but remember that no one ever became strong and resilient by having an easy life.

Thank you for sharing how you have been feeling

Redemption

willowtrees wrote: »

I'm here for you You have been having such a difficult time, and I'm sorry that you have started to doubt yourself and your capabilities. It can feel disheartening when you have been trying hard for so long, but it doesn't feel as if you are succeeding.

But even though you didn't manage to pass at some things, that could just mean you haven't found the *thing* that's for you! You could honestly be one more job application away from landing your dream job, and you could be so close to a horizon of opportunities opening up to you. And it might not mean much coming from me, but each time we have had a discussion on here you have been very articulate, and in no way does it come across as if you are unintelligent or a failure.

I hope you don't mind, but I wanted to give you an alternative perspective on something. You said that you hadn't ever been in a relationship, but I don't think that is bad at all. I think there is a huge proportion of women that would rather a man to have never been in one, than to have tonnes of experience. I know that you might have been talking about it in terms of the loneliness that comes with being single, but perhaps that will be a beneficial when you do get a partner- and it will be a healthier relationship as a result. Many women will even prefer that you are a virgin, as it means that they won't have to feel any jealousy, but also it suggests that you are a loyal man that doesn't just have sex with anyone that he lays his eyes on- and that is such a noble quality to have these days.

And I know how stressful it is for you right now, but remember that no one ever became strong and resilient by having an easy life. Thank you for sharing how you have been feeling

@willowtrees hi, you have been very supportive on a few of my threads and I really appreciate it so was thinking if you don't mind if we can pm about things but fine if you don't want. I appreciate it either way.

Former Member

@FordRanger yeah, I’m fine with that!