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Supporting others and when appropriate

BensonEBensonE Posts: 197 Trailblazer
in Health & Wellbeing
My college tutor told me the other day that I need to learn how to help myself (hard to think of exact wording) before I help others

Basically he's saying I've got an issue where I tend to help those around me even when my MH is shit

My sister (friend whom is a sister figure) told me that I help others before helping myself because I'm a trauma victim and have had to deal with it by myself so I help others before helping myself because I know what it's like to be in there shoes. From which I've been compared to everything from a DA councellor all the way to young carer support worker to reminding them of there safe person/ close friend

Comments

  • Orchid059Orchid059 Discussion Boards Moderator Posts: 390 Listening Ear
    Hi @BensonE it is very kind and selfless of you to want to help out other people who have been through similar circumstances to yourself as not everyone is fortunate to have such valuable support and advice. However, this may become a problem when your own mental health is being put aside to help others. While it is both rewarding to feel like you are able to help others, and impactful for their own wellbeing, remember your own health and wellbeing should be a priority too. I know this is easier said than done though, as it is something I struggle with as well. What I find helps is offering your support and providing advice to those struggling but also perhaps signposting or prompting them to the correct services so that they have the professional support they need. You mentioned that you have experienced some form of trauma, is that something that you would be comfortable sharing so we can better support you? The Mix is a safe space, but only disclose what you feel comfortable to.

    We are always here for you <3

  • BensonEBensonE Posts: 197 Trailblazer
    Orchid059 wrote: »
    Hi @BensonE it is very kind and selfless of you to want to help out other people who have been through similar circumstances to yourself as not everyone is fortunate to have such valuable support and advice. However, this may become a problem when your own mental health is being put aside to help others. While it is both rewarding to feel like you are able to help others, and impactful for their own wellbeing, remember your own health and wellbeing should be a priority too. I know this is easier said than done though, as it is something I struggle with as well. What I find helps is offering your support and providing advice to those struggling but also perhaps signposting or prompting them to the correct services so that they have the professional support they need. You mentioned that you have experienced some form of trauma, is that something that you would be comfortable sharing so we can better support you? The Mix is a safe space, but only disclose what you feel comfortable to.

    We are always here for you <3

    I've shared my trauma previously when I was active on boards but I will re share the trauma @Orchid059
  • ebyrne556ebyrne556 Inactive Posts: 1,232 Wise Owl
    Heya @BensonE just checking in today to see how u r? Just to say only if you feel comfortable re-sharing it then I wonder maybe if you could find your old thread and then tag just in case you don’t wanna go into that much again. Sending hugs we are all here for you. ' <3
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  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 31 Boards Initiate
    Hey yes it does make sense.
    But ur lucky to be able to understand others going through pain.
    But make sure to look after yourself aswell 😉😍
    Sending love ❤️
  • BensonEBensonE Posts: 197 Trailblazer
    Sindy wrote: »
    Hey yes it does make sense.
    But ur lucky to be able to understand others going through pain.
    But make sure to look after yourself aswell 😉😍
    Sending love ❤️

    Are you new here sindy just because I haven't seen you active here much
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