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Housemate hogs the kitchen
David
Posts: 92 Budding Regular
One of my housemates spends hours in the kitchen each day, including having long, loud phone conversations & filming videos he says are for YouTube - all in his language, which I can't understand. He's not a fluent English speaker. How can I stop him from continuing, without causing any problems? I'd like to say to him something like: "Every day you spend far too long in the kitchen. It's unreasonable because we have to share it. Please massively reduce the amount of time you're in the kitchen and have your phone conversations in your room." However, I don't know how he'd react if I said that. He wouldn't understand all of it & I don't want a hostile response. I don't think it's a cultural issue because I can't imagine that hogging the kitchen in a houseshare would be reasonable anywhere in the world.
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The first thing I'd try is trying to use the kitchen when you need it. For example, if he's in the kitchen and you need to cook dinner, you can ask if he can move somewhere so that you can cook. Hopefully he's receptive to this as it's a pretty reasonable ask if the kitchen is small.
Next, I'd try to talk to him about this. I'd focus on the issues that directly affect - so the sleep, dishes and being unable to cook, rather than simply being in the room. Lots of flatmates will come across disagreements at some point, and a simple discussion that isn't hostile can do the trick.
If that doesn't work, I think you might need to consider talking with the other flatmate about reporting the situation to the landlord, because this is affecting your ability to live here if you're not able to cook, sleep, or live in a clean space. I don't know where you live, but flatshares are popular across many cities in the country, so I'd check the market to see what the demand for flatshares is like in the area.
I hope that speaking to your flatmate is enough to resolve the issue, because going through this daily must be a real pain. Of course, feel free to share how it goes here - we're here to listen to you through this ordeal
He makes meals from basic ingredients, which I find strange for a poor twentysomething cooking only for himself. Doing that takes a lot more time, money & effort, as well as using far more items. He thinks it weird that I eat ready meals. He's in the kitchen for multiple times longer than our other housemate & myself combined. He later cleans the many things he uses, but they're a major obstruction until he does so.
I don't even take my phone into the kitchen due to the high risk of it being damaged in there by heat, water etc. I'm baffled at him frequently having long, loud phone conversations in there. I find it bizarre that he films videos in various rooms in the house. It's an ordinary, slightly run-down, small, shared house, yet he seems to sometimes treat his new life here as some sort of fascinating adventure or long holiday.
He has mentioned to me his support of a government which is one of our worst enemies, so I'm suspicious of his motives for moving here. However, saying anything about that could be responded to by me being accused of being xenophobic, even though it's his politics rather than his nationality which concern me.
My other housemate agrees with me about the kitchen-hogging, but he won't say anything to anyone about it. He's an alcoholic who was recently released from prison. He isn't a sociopath & has never caused me any problems, but I don't know what he'd be like in a confrontation. Therefore I don't want an argument between him & the kitchen-hogger, as I fear it could escalate into violence.