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Do I have to tell my mom about my sex life?

_Tech_Addict_Girl_Tech_Addict_Girl Posts: 1,489 Wise Owl
edited July 2023 in Sex & Relationships
Hi so I’ve been thinking do I have to tell my mom about my sex life? because she thinks I’m a virgin but I’m actually not she didn’t want me to have sex in my past relationships or any at the minute but I did because I feel like I make that decision about sex not her she said I don’t want you doing it under my roof so I didn’t do it under her roof she did say if you did do it I wouldn’t be happy but I don’t think it’s her choose if I have sex or not that is personal to me I don’t need to tell her but I want yours opinions on it. I know I have a wheelchair but that doesn’t stop me doing things like that sometimes I think she thinks I’m a little girl and she doesn’t need to know about my sex life in my opinion.

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    Laura_tigger82Laura_tigger82 Moderator Posts: 5,135 Part of The Furniture
    It is completely up to you @_Tech_Addict_Girl and how comfortable you would feel talking to your mom about it. You only need to share as much or as little as you feel comfortable with (and this includes if anything at all!). As long as you are safe and happy, those are the most important things :)
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    kaiikaii Posts: 462 Listening Ear
    Hey @_Tech_Addict_Girl, thank you so much for reaching out. I can understand how uncertain you feel about this. I just wanted to echo what has been said above. It all depends on how comfortable you are telling your mum. You don't have to tell her about your sex life if you feel uncomfortable. Like you said, this is something personal to you. :smile:

    Take care,

    Kai <3
    cinnamoroll supremacy : )
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    Amy22Amy22 Posts: 4,023 Community Veteran
    Hi @_Tech_Addict_Girl choosing to disclose your sex life is a totally personal thing and you shoulden't feel forced or need to tell them. How much we want to reveal or say about sex life is totally up to us and how we feel about it. Honestly I think it is a personal thing too as you should only mention if you feel comfortable and safe too as well. Always here too if you need someone to talk to,

    Sending hugs,

    Amy22 <3
    Just a person who likes pop culture and films
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    independent_independent_ Community Champion Posts: 8,647 Legendary Poster
    I didn't tell my mum directly but she guessed given that I'm in a 5 year relationship, it's your choice if to tell her or not, it's your business after all
    “Sometimes the people around you won’t understand your journey. They don’t need to, it’s not for them.”
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    Terry8936Terry8936 Posts: 271 The Mix Regular
    @_Tech_Addict_Girl Deciding whether or not to share details about your sex life with your parents is a personal choice, and there is no one-size-fits-all answer. It depends on your relationship with your mom, your values, and your comfort level with discussing such matters.

    It's important to remember that as an adult, you have the right to make decisions about your own body and your personal relationships. Your sex life is indeed personal, and you are not obligated to disclose any information about it to your mom if you don't feel comfortable doing so.

    However, consider the dynamics of your relationship with your mom. If you think that keeping this information from her could lead to tension, conflict, or misunderstandings, it may be worth having an open and honest conversation about boundaries and respect. Let her know that you understand her concerns but that you value your independence and privacy in certain aspects of your life.

    Ultimately, communication and trust are essential in any relationship. If you decide to share this information with your mom, it might be helpful to approach the conversation calmly and respectfully, expressing your perspective and feelings while also being receptive to her point of view. Remember, the decision is yours, and you should do what feels right for you and aligns with your values and principles.
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    I'm a community moderator. I'm here to help guide discussions and make sure Community Guidelines are followed. I can't send DMs, but you can message @TheMix or email community@themix.org.uk with questions or concerns.
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    _Tech_Addict_Girl_Tech_Addict_Girl Posts: 1,489 Wise Owl
    @Laura_tigger82 @kaii @Amy22 @independent_ @Terry8936 Hey guys when I was with my ex my mom’s boyfriend kept asking have you done anything and my mom was like you better not have but it just makes me really angry because it’s like she’s telling me what I can and can’t do but I’m 19 and I think I can make them decisions for myself like you guys said I don’t feel comfortable telling them really.
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    Amy22Amy22 Posts: 4,023 Community Veteran
    @_Tech_Addict_Girl I guess mum's can be a little privacy invading at times but honestly if your 19 then you are technically an adult so you should be able to make your own decisions. I know how when someone tells you what to do or not to do it can be very controlling and I can imagine how stressful that must be for you even when you don't feel comfortable talking about it too. As you said if you don't feel comfortable then you shoulden't need to feel pressured into talking about it especially as you are an adult too so you should be able to make your own choices without someone telling you to do what they want really. <3
    Just a person who likes pop culture and films
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    VicK_toriousVicK_torious Posts: 107 The Mix Convert
    Hey @_Tech_Addict_Girl since you're technically an adult, you're always responsible for you and it's up to you to decide whether you want another grown up to know about your sex life! Sometimes you may find it better and more useful to ask for advice etc from someone with more experience at this stuff, or you may feel you know better and don't wish for any advice. All is fine as long as you remember to make safe choices and do let someone close to you know if you ever feel like you could be in danger!

    Stay safe <3
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