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ppl n dwelling

ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 3,963 Community Veteran
in Health & Wellbeing
why do ppl dwell on wat u did yesterday, its stupid
Crazy mad insane

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    StephanieStephanie Moderator Posts: 1,084 Wise Owl
    Hey @ellie2000

    Just wanted to check in to see how you are doing and to let you know we are here for you :smile:
                                   "Happiness can be found even in the darkest of times if only one remembers to turn on the light" - Albus Dumbledore 

    "Like when I was down you just had that smile that made me feel like everything's worthwhile. Thinking of the day when you went away, what a life to take, what a bond to break, I'll be missing you"

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    Past UserPast User Recovering🥀 LondonPosts: 0 Just got here
    edited January 2022
    The user and all related content has been deleted.
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    daisyella12daisyella12 Posts: 119 The Mix Convert
    Hi @ellie2000

    Is there something in particular you did yesterday that someone is dwelling on?

    If you feel comfortable to share I may be able to help you understand why this person may be dwelling :)
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    AislingDMAislingDM Moderator Posts: 1,666 Extreme Poster
    Couldn't agree more with what @Zay has said!! Emotions are such complex messy things and each person can respond so differently to them to be honest. In line with what has already been said, a big part of dwelling comes from not giving yourself enough time to fully process all of the feelings you're having for what they really are. Take grief for instance, this looks totally different for each person, even day by day, but one thing that a lot of people say they struggle with for a prolonged period of time, is how to cope with feelings of guilt for experiencing happiness even when a person they love is gone. Being able to move on from the guilt and not dwell involves asking why you are scared of being happy. Sitting with your emotions and really feeling them is pretty terrifying to be honest, even when they're happy ones, but ultimately it is worth it to be able to understand ourselves better :) Here if you need <3 xx
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    Laura_tigger82Laura_tigger82 Moderator Posts: 5,107 Part of The Furniture
    Hi @ellie2000

    Thanks for reaching out to us. I always appreciate how much courage it must take to reach out.

    Is there a particular situation where people are dwelling on what you did yesterday?

    It must be really tough. I like to see every day as a new day if possible. Though, I appreciate it is sometimes easier said than done.

    If you want to talk to us more about this, we are here for you and listening to you :3
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    ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 3,963 Community Veteran
    i found rum and i drunk it, big mistake!!!! i went on a signal chat, i first said 'hi'. someone answered and i told them tht a band was rubbish they repied 'haha' instead of tlkn about the real issue, i talkd about banging on the floor above, wen i sing, coz its late at nite but they did it first. i got told off by chat 'ffs'
    then i didnt join the weekly zoom lesson. i emailed why i wasnt attending, and i emailed the LT person i was feeling sui--dal. n she gave me numbers. wats nightlight for
    Crazy mad insane
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    ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 3,963 Community Veteran
    at least the music director isnt around, so thts gd. hes the one tht scares me off by telling me i misbehave
    Crazy mad insane
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    BrookeeBrookee Posts: 1,327 Wise Owl
    Hey @ellie2000, it sounds like you’re struggling right now. It’s really great that you’re reaching out to us now. How are you feeling? I’m not sure I know what nightlight is, so I’m sorry I can’t give you any help on that matter!
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    Laura_tigger82Laura_tigger82 Moderator Posts: 5,107 Part of The Furniture
    Hi @ellie2000

    Thanks for reaching out to us. I always appreciate how much courage it must take to reach out.

    It would seem @Brookee has already provided you with some wonderful support. It is great to hear the LT person gave you some numbers in response to feeling suicidal.

    If you want to talk to us about anything, we are here for you. We hear that things are tough for you at the moment <3
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    AislingDMAislingDM Moderator Posts: 1,666 Extreme Poster
    Glad you're talking with us here, Ellie <3 Sometimes navigating those kinds of convos in online settings is actually proper difficult like being able to work out what people really mean is hard to be honest. It's no wonder you're left thinking about past interactions and stuff like that. When you say 'talk about the real issue', I wonder if you would have felt comfortable saying to the person 'well, hey what do you think of this specific part of what I said?' in order to get that conversation ball rolling a bit? =)
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    ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 3,963 Community Veteran
    =) u tlk sense @AislingDM
    i also need help proper english vocab so ppl dont hear odd words, wen speaking. i think abit n go 'errmm... or wat d'yu call' sometimes ppl get rowdy waiting. should i change 4 ppl?

    thank you
    Crazy mad insane
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    AislingDMAislingDM Moderator Posts: 1,666 Extreme Poster
    haha thank you Ellie! That's an interesting thought and I can certainly understand the inclination to want to change our natural way of being to suit others but ultimately I don't know if it's worth it, because then we aren't being true to ourselves. Plus, there is always the possibility that these same people would get frustrated over other things too!

    Would you want English vocab help for yourself as well? =)
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    Laura_tigger82Laura_tigger82 Moderator Posts: 5,107 Part of The Furniture
    Hi @ellie2000

    Thanks for reaching out to us and great question too. Just like @AislingDM said, I don't think you should change for people. I instead think you should be your true self as much as you can, as long as it is not harmful for anyone else! Keep shining :)
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    AislingDMAislingDM Moderator Posts: 1,666 Extreme Poster
    Just wanted to check in and see if you're feeling okay about all this stuff at the minute @ellie2000 ? <3
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    ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 3,963 Community Veteran
    I had coffee with Mr c and opining up rilise myself tht I feel sh*t
    Crazy mad insane
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    Laura_tigger82Laura_tigger82 Moderator Posts: 5,107 Part of The Furniture
    Hi @ellie2000

    Thanks for your response. I am really glad to hear you had coffee with Mr C and felt comfortable to trust Mr C. We are proud of you for opening up as we realise this is particularly challenging. Would you like to talk to us about why you feel shit? What normally helps you when you feel shit? We are here for you! <3
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    I'm a community moderator. I'm here to help guide discussions and make sure Community Guidelines are followed. I can't send DMs, but you can message @TheMix or email community@themix.org.uk with questions or concerns.
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