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I am a pathetic attention seeker

Kate_20Kate_20 Posts: 653 Incredible Poster
Everyone can live without me. I guess my support worker is kind to me because of job requirement. I am way too fragile. I am a coward. I have so many shortcomings. Some people are just not allowed to treat me badly. I am wondering how they would view me if they are not in their work settings. I am a pathetic attention seeker who's got nothing left.
Tengo el alma en cuarentena y roto el cuerpo
Qué dolor, qué pena y qué tormento
El Kanka - Lo mal que estoy y lo poco que me quejo

Comments

  • Laura_tigger82Laura_tigger82 Moderator Posts: 5,086 Part of The Furniture
    Hi @Kate_20

    Thanks for reaching out to us. I always appreciate how much courage it must take to reach out.

    I am sorry to hear you are still struggling. I am sure your support worker cares about you as a person and not just because they get paid! Yes, it is their job requirement but most often support workers care about the people they work with.

    You are not fragile. You are simply in a difficult place, having a hard time, and are hurting. However, three other things about you are that you are kind, supportive, and determined. You are more than what you have to go through.

    What has made you feel this way?

    And by the way, I don't get paid to be kind so you can't tell me it is because of my job! I just care and think you are a wonderful member of our community <3
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    I'm a community moderator. I'm here to help guide discussions and make sure Community Guidelines are followed. I can't send DMs, but you can message @TheMix or email community@themix.org.uk with questions or concerns.
  • Kate_20Kate_20 Posts: 653 Incredible Poster
    @Laura_tigger82 We talked about all my shortcomings and why my parents were angry with me. I guess most people cannot endure all my shortcomings. I have more shortcomings than most people and I am stubborn.
    Tengo el alma en cuarentena y roto el cuerpo
    Qué dolor, qué pena y qué tormento
    El Kanka - Lo mal que estoy y lo poco que me quejo
  • BrookeeBrookee Posts: 1,327 Wise Owl
    @Kate_20 It sounds like you're dealing with a lot of pain right now, I hear you and I'm here for you. You're very worthy and deserve love and kindness, others reactions or actions in response to what you're dealing with isn't your fault, and you don't deserve to be treated as though you're an inconvenience or not worthy of love and support.
  • Kate_20Kate_20 Posts: 653 Incredible Poster
    @Brookee Sometimes I don't feel like I need kindness because a bit of kindness would make me want to be alive but being alive is a mistake. Being alive is so hard.
    Tengo el alma en cuarentena y roto el cuerpo
    Qué dolor, qué pena y qué tormento
    El Kanka - Lo mal que estoy y lo poco que me quejo
  • Laura_tigger82Laura_tigger82 Moderator Posts: 5,086 Part of The Furniture
    edited January 2022
    Hi @Kate_20

    Thanks for your response. I think all humans have imperfections! Imperfections do not define how others should view you though (including yourself!).

    I am also stubborn! I think being stubborn is a good thing sometimes. It can be particularly good for listening to your gut instinct and following your passions. We also see good things about you that you are not able to see right now because you are hurting.

    It would also seem you are basing your view of yourself on how others perceive you. It is easier to hold onto the negatives than the compliments, unfortunately.

    We are here for you, listening to you, and always caring about you <3
    FAQ | How to report a post | How to report spam
    I'm a community moderator. I'm here to help guide discussions and make sure Community Guidelines are followed. I can't send DMs, but you can message @TheMix or email community@themix.org.uk with questions or concerns.
  • BrookeeBrookee Posts: 1,327 Wise Owl
    Hey @Kate_20

    I know you may feel like you don’t want kindness but you do deserve it. Your brain puts you through so much and you’re doing incredible trying everyday! Being alive is very hard but look at you!! You’re doing what you can within your circumstances and your keep trying despite all the setbacks. You’re a very strong and capable and compassionate individual. You deserve love, kindness and support, particularly when those feelings are hard for you to accept right now <3
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