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who talk to

ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 3,962 Community Veteran
in Sex & Relationships
is chatting to a peer member btr than a therapist
Crazy mad insane

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    ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 3,962 Community Veteran
    i'd tlk to any1 l8ly n ppl tell me off
    Crazy mad insane
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    kaishapb_15kaishapb_15 Posts: 15 Settling in
    Hey @ellie2000 I would say talking to a peer member can be a bit more relaxed than talking to a therapist if you are not quite ready. A therapist might be something that is needed depending on the issue. Is there something in particular you would like to talk about?
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    ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 3,962 Community Veteran
    i tlk too peer member coz im desperate. wats tht bcap or hptt as one site
    Crazy mad insane
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    kaishapb_15kaishapb_15 Posts: 15 Settling in
    Okay would you like to discuss the issue here with me?
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    ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 3,962 Community Veteran
    everyday is rubbish, i dont live i just survive since 2010. waiting 4 the night to come
    Crazy mad insane
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    ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 3,962 Community Veteran
    wats ur take
    Crazy mad insane
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    AislingDMAislingDM Moderator Posts: 1,666 Extreme Poster
    I completely agree with @kaishapb_15 ! Sometimes peers can be the best answer and other times a trained professional might be more helpful for you, like a therapist. It sounds like you're struggling a lot right now, Ellie. Life feeling like you're just getting by and surviving is truly horrid for you. I'm wondering, where do you these feelings come from? <3
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    ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 3,962 Community Veteran
    i get left hanging, if i ask questions, ppl who it is aimed at leave. wen i hav bad feelings wen im home alone i take my clothes off
    Crazy mad insane
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    kaishapb_15kaishapb_15 Posts: 15 Settling in
    @ellie2000 I am sorry to hear you are feeling this way, you do seem to be struggling a lot. Is there something happening causing to feel you this way right now or have this feelings been bothering you for a while?
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    ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 3,962 Community Veteran
    i just been feeling 'wish it was dark forever'
    Crazy mad insane
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    kaishapb_15kaishapb_15 Posts: 15 Settling in
    That is not a nice way to feel, you deserve to be happy! is there any way you can get in contact with a doctor, I think they would be able to help you feel differently? What do you think about getting further help?
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    kaishapb_15kaishapb_15 Posts: 15 Settling in
    @ellie2000 how are you today?
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    kimberley1907kimberley1907 Posts: 84 Budding Regular
    Hi @ellie2000
    I'm sorry to read how you've been feeling recently. As the others on this post have said, it depends on what you feel you need right now. A therapist is a good option if you feel you need a bit more focused and professional help. A peer mentor might be good to get things off your chest and talk.

    Like @kaishapb_15 suggested, getting in. touch with your GP and talking about maybe getting options spoken about and maybe a therapist sorted might be a good idea if that's what you want and you're comfortable with it.

    I think for now, both might be a good idea. It can often take a little while for a therapist on the NHS to come through, so while you wait, the peer mentor might be a really good place you can go to in the mean time, to talk about anything you want to.
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    ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 3,962 Community Veteran
    isnt a peer mentor like no time talkin but the 'recovery star' wats tht 4, i heard peer mentoring is about pushy
    Crazy mad insane
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    ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 3,962 Community Veteran
    u dont control coversations
    Crazy mad insane
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    kimberley1907kimberley1907 Posts: 84 Budding Regular
    I've had peer mentors through education, so I'm not sure exactly how they work in other settings. But usually you can come to them with whatever you want to speak about, they're there for you to speak to. It should be someone that you can go to to speak to, and you should be able to control the conversation. Everyone's experiences are different obviously, but don't let one experience you've heard deter you from trying it. It might work out well for you.
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    AislingDMAislingDM Moderator Posts: 1,666 Extreme Poster
    Yes I'd echo what @kimberley1907 has said, @ellie2000 ! Peer mentors in mental health settings are about being supported by someone who has a lived experience with similar mental health needs and concerns as you! The wonderful thing about these types of support is that the person can really understand your feelings, emotions and experiences. Are you thinking of getting a peer support mentor?
    FAQ | How to report a post | How to report spam
    I'm a community moderator. I'm here to help guide discussions and make sure Community Guidelines are followed. I can't send DMs, but you can message @TheMix or email community@themix.org.uk with questions or concerns.
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    ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 3,962 Community Veteran
    i had a peer mentor n all he wanted do was the 'recovery star' wats tht, i couldnt vent my feelings
    Crazy mad insane
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    kimberley1907kimberley1907 Posts: 84 Budding Regular
    I had a look at what a recovery star was online, and it seems to just be a sort of model that people use to plan and support helping someone. Lots of people use different things to help people, and that might just be one thing that you peer mentor then used. Maybe it just didn't work for you personally, and that's fine. What kind of things did he talk about using this model? Did he try to lead the discussions? This might be because of the model, but another mentor might be a better idea, and might do things differently and work with you better.
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    ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 3,962 Community Veteran
    he did take over the discussion, it was like a lecture, i couldnt get a word in edgeways, i dipped in and out of his convos coz he was boring n he sounded like arthur dent out of 'hitchikers guide'. the peer support worker was gd, he asked me how i was doing n stuff. peer support worker sorted stuff out n listened. peer mentor was kindof pushy
    Crazy mad insane
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    ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 3,962 Community Veteran
    nobody rang me today frm the HMN, shall i tlk to one peers
    instead
    Crazy mad insane
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    kimberley1907kimberley1907 Posts: 84 Budding Regular
    I'm sorry you had that experience with the peer mentor. I don't believe that's how they're meant to work and operate at all. It's meant to be a support person that you can talk to easily. I think it might have just been a bad person, so don't it put you off accessing help from a peer mentor if you need one.

    The peer support worker sounds much better, and I'm glad he listened. Was the HMN agreed to ring you yesterday? Sometimes you have to chase things with a lot of people, so maybe give them a ring when you can to ask what's happening.

    In the meantime, if you want to speak to the peer support worker that might be a good idea, and if you want a peer mentor, then maybe speak about getting someone different this time.
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    ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 3,962 Community Veteran
    i sed at the end i wouldn't recommomend peer mentor. it was HMN who agreed to ring thursday. i feel tht services have slacked abit. i h8 meltdowns how do ppl prevent them from hpning
    Crazy mad insane
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    kimberley1907kimberley1907 Posts: 84 Budding Regular
    I'm sorry to hear you haven't had a great experience with them. Maybe try to chase them up Monday? I know it's exhausting and annoying to, but I used to have to all the time with my mental health support, to keep reminding them I was there and wanted to speak to them. How has today been for you? I usually try to acknowledge the signs of when I don't feel good, and be kind to myself. I let myself eat what I want, watch some of my favourite things and either spend time with friends or family or spend time alone, whatever I feel like I need. What are some things you enjoy that usually can help you feel better?
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    ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 3,962 Community Veteran
    today i woke up, i thought 'ugh day' i watchd junk on youtube, watchd shameless, i playd keyboard. my fav tunes to play is the 'coffin dance' with one round of the 'death dance' in the middle. i had a bath, now i feel free of being scared. does nudity elevatate feelings like make you happier?
    Crazy mad insane
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    kimberley1907kimberley1907 Posts: 84 Budding Regular
    Those all sound like really lovely things Ellie!
    Did you really enjoy doing some of those things? I hope they made you feel better.
    I find it really important to find some good things that I know make me feel better for when I don't feel good, and you seem to have some really good hobbies too. Playing instruments can be a great way to focus on one thing and try to relax, so I'm glad you have and enjoy that. (I wish I could play an instrument, I tried learning the violin but stopped after a while)
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    ellie2000ellie2000 Posts: 3,962 Community Veteran
    i sometimes do stuff wen i uneasy too, i like keyboard :)
    Crazy mad insane
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