If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Options
Will things get better?
Past User
Posts: 0 Just got here
The user and all related content has been deleted.
0
This discussion has been closed.
Comments
It’s understandable that you’d be very upset with your boyfriend cancelling plans or not inviting you to things, even after you have told him how you feel and what he can do to help avoid cancelling. It also makes sense that you’d get upset about not being invited and feel that this signals that he doesn’t genuinely want you.
Sometimes people, for whatever reason, are late and/or they cancel, or they might not think to invite the other person, or maybe they don’t think their partner would want to come etc. and sometimes you might have to see that this is who they are and that you can’t change that. You might want to weigh up whether you believe that he loves you, and that he tries but still might cancel or not invite you, against leaving the relationship. Maybe you can compromise on things- for example, if he cancels, you can ask him to reschedule at a time when he is less likely to cancel. Or if he doesn’t invite you to things, perhaps you can ask to go or invite yourself? It would be nice to feel invited but sometimes people might just not think, which can come across as uncaring, but it might not always be intentional.
That said, you shouldn’t have to put up with a relationship that is getting you down either. If you feel you have tried talking to him, you have tried to compromise or find ways to work things out, and it’s still leaving you feel unhappy, maybe you can ask to take a break from the relationship so that you can think about whether you want to stay with your boyfriend or whether it’s best to go your separate ways.
Relationship difficulties and break-ups are hard and can take their toll. It’s understandable you feel like you need more support at this time, and The Mix is always here for you!
I'm sorry to see that you're going through a tough time with your boyfriend.
Echoing what Maisy said, if you've tried working it out through various options with little to no result then I believe you should re-evaluate your friendship. Take a break and reassess your wants and needs in this relationship. It's not going to be easy but we're going to here for you!
Loving someone is one thing but if you're suffering at the expense of love then it's not worth it.
If you want to contact the staff team here you can find us on community@themix.org.uk