Hi, my name is Fady!

FadyFady LondonPosts: 1 Noob
I'm kind of late into joining this community since I just turned 24 literally a week ago but I just discovered  this website via Tumblr today and felt it was right to seek an understanding community where I could be listened to, even  if I could only stay in here for a year before I turn 25 this time next year. Academically speaking, I am going through a crucial stage in my life, and so, I sometimes feel like I cannot bear the stress it is putting me on at the moment. The stress that exams at MSc level give me are eating me alive and really challenging but my dream has always been to obtain a postgraduate degree before I turn 25 in order to feel 'academically complete'. I feel like I won't be happy in life until I pass all my modules but my anxiety into 'what ifs' is eating me alive. What if I don't make my parents proud (they paid for half my tuition fees), what if I miss this opportunity and end up wasting 2 years of my life and hard work for nothing? Last October, I actually convinced my parents that I wanted to have my first weekend part-time job in retail, they supported me but asked me to focus on my studies above all since the finishing line is near. All I've known is school and university, education has so far been my whole life. So, I felt the need to try something new and for 6 months, I ended up working with an amazing team of people even if it was for minimum wage. I actually enjoyed my time there but then exam season struck and reality sinked in. It was a nice change but I needed my weekends to study, retail is hard work but enjoyable but I can't spend my whole life in retail knowing that I'm someone who was accepted into a post-graduate course 1.5 years ago. I want to live comfortably, knowing that 20 years of continuous education without a single gap year have paid off. If I lose the chance of graduating I will feel like a failure for the rest of my life. I've never been outstanding in academia, but I've been good enough to pass with a merit level (60% average) so far. I am also someone who dreams of travelling the world, especially east asia, but I can't reach that dream without funds if my career crumbles down. I want job security to be happy. Anyway, I've been depressed lately, have 5 exams total with 4 to go left this May. They are crucial for my career in Audiology and since not many universities offer this course, if I miss my dream of becoming an Audiologist I will never forgive myself. Sorry for my long post, I know it was supposed to be an introductory first message but I guess I went all in with my feelings huh? If anyone read all the way here then I sincerely appreciate you for reading about what I'm going through. Thank you. :3
kathleen0172Aife

Comments

  • kathleen0172kathleen0172 [Inactive User] Posts: 1,456 Fanatical Poster
    Hey @Fady

    I'm really sorry you're going through this <3 I can hear this is stressful for you.  I'm glad you've joined and have told us how you're feeling.

    It sounds like you're really worried of failing these exams, and what it will mean for you if that happens - would you say that's right?

    We're here to support you. It looks to me like you have dreams and determination, and are trying your best with the course. I'm wishing you the best with this, and though I can't confirm whether you'll pass or not, what I can offer to you is that things will be okay :-3

    Sending hugs <3
    FadyClaraOswald
  • AifeAife Posts: 1,723 Moderator
    edited May 12
    Hey @Fady welcome! It's really great you found us! Even when you reach 25 you'll still be welcome to post here. Our signposts might not always be relevant to you but we'll do our best to continue to support you.

    It sounds like you're under a lot of stress at the moment and feeling a lot of pressure. It's understandable to hear how you're feeling, this is a lot for anyone to go through. You've come to the right place. Like Kathleen said, we're all here to support you. When you're ready, you can head to one of our subforms like Health and Wellbeing or Student Life and Education to make a thread to get some more support from us :) 

    Take care <3


    Maybe somethings don't get better, but we do. We get stronger. We learn to live with our situations as messy and ugly as they are. We fix what we can and we adapt to what we can't. Maybe some of us will never fully be okay, but at least we're here. We're still trying. We're doing the best we can. That's worth celebrating too ❤
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