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Should I get an referral to cahms?

davcr0ckdavcr0ck South Oxfordshire (homophobic Oxfordshire) Posts: 661 Extreme Poster
Hey all, 

On the 15th April was biggest depressed day I've had in an long time, to the point at that evening I nearing commit sucide (not going into details,) and close friend and my dog (my dog smart) stopped me, an few weeks ago I kept having like day dreams and nightmares of someone killing me or me killing myself and after this I would just ball out crying for 30 minutes. And until yesterday (17/04/19) i have decided to speak out, I blacked out on the train outside Radley and then got woken up by the guard when we arrived at reading.for the rest of the day I was scared and I didn't enjoy my favourite thing (train spotting hence why on the train)

So I'm looking for advice and should I push for an referral to cahms

Also I need to know, If I go into the deep s*** in my mind, I need it to be confidential, is that possible,

Thanks in an million for anyone's help

P.s.im kind of feeling better today but not back to my full self. 
Love is love and everyone is accepting and can share their issues with no judge from me and I try to help 
Tagged:
Kathleen07Kasa2103

Comments

  • ItaliaItalia Posts: 81 Staff Moderator
    edited April 17

    It sounds like you have had a really rough couple of days, I'm sorry you have been going through all of this.   Thank you for reaching out and talking about it even though you feel a little better today.  It takes a lot of courage to talk about nearly ending your life, so well done :)

    Talking to someone about what happened over the past few days sounds like a really good idea.  Have you thought of going and speaking with your GP?   Even if your not sure if a CAMHS referral is right for you, your GP will be able to give you all the information you need to make that choice.   Going to the GP to talk about mental health can feel quite scary, but it sounds like you have a really good support person in your close friend.  Taking a support person to the GP with you could be really helpful if you are feeling worried about it.

    You also mentioned you wanted to know a bit more about confidentiality.  This is a great question! =)

    All services (including your GP and CAMHS) will have different ways for keeping people safe while still respecting their confidentiality when they can.   You should be able to ask anytime and the person your speaking with will either give you a copy of theirs, or talk you through it. For example here is how The Mix handles confidentiality.  If you have any questions about it, please just ask, and we are happy to explain it more. 

    It is really good to hear your feeling a little better, and that you had people (and pets!) to help support you through it.  :)  If this ever happens again, or even if your feeling a little low and want to talk it through, below are some really great services you can get in touch with. 

    • The Mix has a crisis messenger text service which is free, 24/7 crisis support across the UK. If you’re aged 25 or under, and are experiencing any painful emotion or are in crisis, you can text THEMIX to 85258.
    • Samaritans is a really great helpline, which you can call any time on 116 123 to get support
    • You can also call Papryus helpline on 0800 068 41 41 - this is a helpline for anyone under 25 who is worried about how they are feeling.

    I hope this helps, and your feeling okay today.
    Italia
    "Owning your story is the bravest thing you will ever do" - Brene Brown
    davcr0ck
  • Kathleen07Kathleen07 Future musician Posts: 1,536 Postholic
    Hey David <3

    Sending hugs and love. I'm so sorry to hear you've been struggling like that:(

    Getting a referral to CAMHS sounds good, and it's positive that you're thinking about it. I hope you get the referral and that they can help in some way x

    As for needing things to be confidential... I think everything will remain so, unless they think you're in danger. So if you say you have suicide plans, or that you're being abused, they'll probably break confidentiality. But if they don't think you're at any risk of harm, it stays between you and them. I'm fairly sure it's like that, but don't take my word for it lol.
    When life leaves us blind, love keeps us kind - Linkin Park

    Sing it for the boys, sing it for the girls, everytime that you lose it sing it for the world - MCR
    davcr0ck
  • anayaanaya Posts: 3 Newbie
    hi David,

    I'm so sorry you have to go through that. I kinda went through the same thing involving camhs and mental health problems and if you want to ask any questions about my experience that might help you with yours feel free to xx
    davcr0ck
  • davcr0ckdavcr0ck South Oxfordshire (homophobic Oxfordshire) Posts: 661 Extreme Poster
    edited April 24
    Italia said:

    It sounds like you have had a really rough couple of days, I'm sorry you have been going through all of this.   Thank you for reaching out and talking about it even though you feel a little better today.  It takes a lot of courage to talk about nearly ending your life, so well done :)

    Talking to someone about what happened over the past few days sounds like a really good idea.  Have you thought of going and speaking with your GP?   Even if your not sure if a CAMHS referral is right for you, your GP will be able to give you all the information you need to make that choice.   Going to the GP to talk about mental health can feel quite scary, but it sounds like you have a really good support person in your close friend.  Taking a support person to the GP with you could be really helpful if you are feeling worried about it.

    You also mentioned you wanted to know a bit more about confidentiality.  This is a great question! =)

    All services (including your GP and CAMHS) will have different ways for keeping people safe while still respecting their confidentiality when they can.   You should be able to ask anytime and the person your speaking with will either give you a copy of theirs, or talk you through it. For example here is how The Mix handles confidentiality.  If you have any questions about it, please just ask, and we are happy to explain it more. 

    It is really good to hear your feeling a little better, and that you had people (and pets!) to help support you through it.  :)  If this ever happens again, or even if your feeling a little low and want to talk it through, below are some really great services you can get in touch with. 

    • The Mix has a crisis messenger text service which is free, 24/7 crisis support across the UK. If you’re aged 25 or under, and are experiencing any painful emotion or are in crisis, you can text THEMIX to 85258.
    • Samaritans is a really great helpline, which you can call any time on 116 123 to get support
    • You can also call Papryus helpline on 0800 068 41 41 - this is a helpline for anyone under 25 who is worried about how they are feeling.

    I hope this helps, and your feeling okay today.
    Italia
    Hey @italia thanks for your response, I found out from an friend today that's theirs an 1 year waiting list for cahms, so do you over what happens for people over 18,this their an separate service or is it the same thing.

    Yesterday I did have an great day with friends, but had an panic attack when I got home and felt sucidal again but I already removed everything sharp out of my room and locked the cupboard and gave the key to my brother.

    I didn't read your message until this morning, although on the bright side of things I have an boyfriend now😁😁, so I probably be over in the relationship section soon. 

    [tweaked by moderator]
    Love is love and everyone is accepting and can share their issues with no judge from me and I try to help 
  • davcr0ckdavcr0ck South Oxfordshire (homophobic Oxfordshire) Posts: 661 Extreme Poster
    anaya said:
    hi David,

    I'm so sorry you have to go through that. I kinda went through the same thing involving camhs and mental health problems and if you want to ask any questions about my experience that might help you with yours feel free to xx
    Hey @anaya

    Thanks for your response, do you know if you can get an referral other than though your gp, because my gp is an bit of an ass (best way to say it without inappropriate words) I would change my gp but my doctor surgery is oversubscribed and the same with the others.
    Love is love and everyone is accepting and can share their issues with no judge from me and I try to help 
  • anayaanaya Posts: 3 Newbie
    Hi @davcr0ck

    The first time I was put into camhs was through the crisis team as I ended up in hospital so they met me there and spoke to me. But there are other ways if you don't want to go through your doctor but, that is the suggested way. There are outside smaller mental health teams that might help you directly or refer you, I also live in Oxfordshire and there is this place called abingdon bridge that helps with stuff like this. Camhs only take referrals from professionals like social workers and schools ect. I'm pretty sure when you're 16-17 you can talk to them directly and they'll talk to you, however I'm not too sure about this as I was only 14 when I got referred.

    Hope this helps
    Anaya xx 
    davcr0ck
  • davcr0ckdavcr0ck South Oxfordshire (homophobic Oxfordshire) Posts: 661 Extreme Poster
    So i've tried phoning my gp today to get an appointment but everytime i phone him, i just stop halfway typing the number in and i just start crying and throw whatever i'm holding across the room, (i've broke my house phone now, rip)

    my boyfriend says we help me phone when this weekend but their not open on weekends so i'm just stuck in this circle again  :s  
    Love is love and everyone is accepting and can share their issues with no judge from me and I try to help 
  • Kathleen07Kathleen07 Future musician Posts: 1,536 Postholic

    It definitely sounds like you're struggling to phone him. What's that like? - are you too anxious to cope with it, for example? I know you mentioned him being a bit of an ass lol, so I'm wondering if you're scared he'll be mean, or anything?

    I think it's great that you've got a boyfriend now, by the way.

    <3
    When life leaves us blind, love keeps us kind - Linkin Park

    Sing it for the boys, sing it for the girls, everytime that you lose it sing it for the world - MCR
  • davcr0ckdavcr0ck South Oxfordshire (homophobic Oxfordshire) Posts: 661 Extreme Poster

    It definitely sounds like you're struggling to phone him. What's that like? - are you too anxious to cope with it, for example? I know you mentioned him being a bit of an ass lol, so I'm wondering if you're scared he'll be mean, or anything?

    I think it's great that you've got a boyfriend now, by the way.

    <3
    Hey @kathleen0172

    To give you an idea why I dislike the man, he told me and parents once when we saw him about an rash all over my body(in the end was just an heat rash) he claimed that we needed to go to A&E (on new years eve) because he said it was meningitis (which at the age I was back then, I couldn't even get it)

    Another time, he's sent me the emergency MH services at A&E because I was sucidal and was thrown stuff all over the place (fair enough on that) 

    Everytime I phone my gp, I will dual half the nujbeg and start crying for an minute and then become very angry with myself for being an faullery on not getting help 
    Love is love and everyone is accepting and can share their issues with no judge from me and I try to help 
    Kathleen07Kasa2103
  • htwohig2412htwohig2412 Posts: 112 The Mix convert

    It definitely sounds like you're struggling to phone him. What's that like? - are you too anxious to cope with it, for example? I know you mentioned him being a bit of an ass lol, so I'm wondering if you're scared he'll be mean, or anything?

    I think it's great that you've got a boyfriend now, by the way.

    <3
    Hey @davcr0ck

    Sorry to hear you're having a rough time lately, we're all here for you for as long as you want us to be. 

    Just a thought - does your GP have an email address or an online booking system you could use instead? May be less daunting than having to speak on the phone. Or is there anyone you could ask to make the appointment for you?

    Take Care.
    "I know what I have to do now, I’ve got to keep breathing because tomorrow the sun will rise. Who knows what the tide could bring?"
    Cast Away


  • davcr0ckdavcr0ck South Oxfordshire (homophobic Oxfordshire) Posts: 661 Extreme Poster

    It definitely sounds like you're struggling to phone him. What's that like? - are you too anxious to cope with it, for example? I know you mentioned him being a bit of an ass lol, so I'm wondering if you're scared he'll be mean, or anything?

    I think it's great that you've got a boyfriend now, by the way.

    <3
    Hey @davcr0ck

    Sorry to hear you're having a rough time lately, we're all here for you for as long as you want us to be. 

    Just a thought - does your GP have an email address or an online booking system you could use instead? May be less daunting than having to speak on the phone. Or is there anyone you could ask to make the appointment for you?

    Take Care.
    Hey @htwohig2412

    After spending an hour digging around the website, I can book online but I have to go to my doctor first to set it up 😔, so online booking isn't really an option an never is by email, I would have to go in and book an appointment.

    But the thing that really pisses me off, is I have to have an telephone appointment with him or an random doctor and then their decide if I get an actual in person apportionments, I think its the only gp practice in Oxfordshire that do it, I've already tried to get my boyfriend to do it for me but their didn't allow it.

    I have no other option other than going in 😔
    Love is love and everyone is accepting and can share their issues with no judge from me and I try to help 
    Kathleen07htwohig2412Kasa2103
  • davcr0ckdavcr0ck South Oxfordshire (homophobic Oxfordshire) Posts: 661 Extreme Poster
    ***POSSIBLE TRIGGER - you been warned***

    So last week as I was generally in an better mood, I went to my gp and spoke to him about what happened over Easter and mother day, my appointment with him was only 10 minutes, 

    As soon as I mentioned cahms, he started swearing and shouting, and had an rant on how I wouldn't get onto cahms, quoting his words "f***** cahms are so s***, they won't help you, you remember what they said three years ago, they said that you didn't have an issue even though you were self harming and attempting sucide" (that was the last time I tried)

    So after that I now feel like I don't have an gp no more, I can't change gp, I regret telling my mum about my appointment with my gp, as she wants to beat the s*** out of him,

    My mood is quite alright at the moment and manageing quite well, thanks to my boyfriend, 
    Love is love and everyone is accepting and can share their issues with no judge from me and I try to help 
  • ItaliaItalia Posts: 81 Staff Moderator
    Hey @davcr0ck

    Well done for going and seeing your GP even though it sounds like a really horrible experience. It must feel really disappointing after going through such an ordeal to go see the GP in the first place. You were really brave to book an appointment, you seemed to really be struggling with that a few weeks ago. I hope the GP's reaction doesn't undermine the hard work you put into making it happen. 

    It sounds like your GP is really frustrated with the CAHMS system, which is fair, but their reaction wasn't and I am sorry that you had to hear that, it doesn't sound like its helped you at all. Is there a reason why you can't change GP's? 

    Your mum sounds just as upset as you are about the appointment. Is chatting with your mum about the next steps something you would consider doing? Sometimes coming up with a plan to move forward can help with everyone's frustrations. 

    It is really great to hear that your mood is alright and things are going well with your boyfriend.  It sounds like you are doing really well in spite of what happened with your GP!  Well done! 

    Keep us updated about how you go.  I hope your able to get some answers soon.
    Italia :) 
    "Owning your story is the bravest thing you will ever do" - Brene Brown
  • davcr0ckdavcr0ck South Oxfordshire (homophobic Oxfordshire) Posts: 661 Extreme Poster
    I probably just keep self managing it like I've been doing for 6 years and stay in silence, the gp in my area is oversubscribed so I can't change gps, I could try with my counsellor maybe but then I think we would have to break the confidentiality of what we talk about.

    I just stay plodding along on slience most likely 
    Love is love and everyone is accepting and can share their issues with no judge from me and I try to help 
    AifeKasa2103
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