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hannahxoxohannahxoxo Posts: 34 Boards Initiate
in Health & Wellbeing
i spend everyday wanting to be someone else. i try to 'look good', nothing helps. im ugly. i really am. no one can tell me otherwise. i dont have a million guys chasing after me like most of my friends. i dont get stared at by guys or even looked at, noone notices me, noone cares. ive been struggling so much, i put on a smile so maybe thats the reason noone asks if im ok. even if i did tell them they wouldnt care, why should they? its not their problem, theyre not ugly. ill try anything to be skinny but noone notices. even my family dont care, they see i stay in bed all the time, they see i dont go out, they see im always upset, they see i dont love myself. but they dont do anything. noone cares about me i have no purpose. i will never be happy, i will never be pretty or skinny. i will never appeal to guys or find love, i will always be alone. theres no hope left, i help everyone with their problems but noone helps me. what did i do to deserve this life? whats the point, im just existing. why did i get stuck with this life. 

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    BubblesGoesBooBubblesGoesBoo Posts: 3,590 Community Veteran
    Heey Hannah, im sorry you're going through such a tough time :(

    Have you tried speaking to your friends about how you feel? you say they wouldn't care, but if theyre your friends they will care.

    I used to have the same mindset, but with time I became more confident within myself and I realized everything I was doing to try make myself 'look better' was only destroying me. Beauty comes from within. yeah your friends might have guys chasing them, but looks only get people so far, if you want a lasting relationship just be who you are, cause that's what people are looking for.

    something else I have learnt is you're never going to be happy if you stay in bed all the time, yeahh sometimes it's needed, but you need to fill your life with things you enjoy, try taking up a new hobby or something to fill your time, it's also a good way to meet others who have the same interest as you :)


    Have you ever spoken to someone about the way you feel? maybe its an option? just to get that little bit extra support aswell :)


    Hope things start looking up for you soon <3
    ' So I put a bullet where I shouda put a helmet, and I crash my car cause I wanna get carried away, that's why I'm standing on the overpass screaming at myself 'hey, I wanna get better''  
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    AzzimanAzziman Moderator, Community Champion Posts: 1,851 Extreme Poster
    Hey Hannah,

    So sorry to hear about what you're going through :/

    It sounds like you care a lot about what others think of you, and that's normal. But don't let that dictate what you think about yourself. Learn to love yourself first, so that others can learn to love you too. I think it's great you've opened up here - maybe talking to some of your friends would help even more?x

    Hope things improve soon!x

    Much love <3
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