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its complicated..
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I am depressed and I self harm, I find it really hard to speak to anyone and I just seem to push every one away...especially my boyfriend who I nearly ended the relationship with recently. I seem to be avoiding going out with him, I love him to bits I really do but like I'm ashamed of the affect me being depressed has on him.
Another problem is in the bedroom..I don't wanna do anything at all, and this is because I'm ashamed of what I have done to myself and I am scared of my boyfriends' reaction to this, any advice or help please??
Another problem is in the bedroom..I don't wanna do anything at all, and this is because I'm ashamed of what I have done to myself and I am scared of my boyfriends' reaction to this, any advice or help please??
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It sounds like you're going through a difficult time at the moment and there seems to be a lot on your mind. Well done for posting - these things are often hard to talk about, so asking for advice here is a great first step
You said you find it hard to talk to anyone about your depression and self harm. That is totally understandable, so it's really positive that you've got yourself on a counselling waiting list. Do you know roughly how long you'll have to wait? We've got an article about confiding in someone that might help you feel more confident about talking to somebody. Have you tried talking to your boyfriend? Do you think it would help?
Am I right in thinking that you're not sure about going to the GP because you don't want your parents to find out about your self harm? If so, there's another article about confidentiality that explains whether the GP will contact your parents or not.
Let us know how you're doing
JPick
And yes you are totally right that I don't want to see my gp because I don't want my parents to find out as I'm not 16 yet, my 16th birthday is in about 3 weeks time.
Thank you for replying:)
I'm so glad you reached out on here. I understand how you feel because i used to be in a similar situation.
When you're depressed your brain doesn't work the way it should and Depression tells you all sorts of horrible lies. It undermines you and tells you you're not good enough, that you're effecting him negatively and tells you you should be ashamed.
But i promise you you have nothing to be ashamed of. I've had some partners that have made a fuss about my self harm scars and i soon learnt they were never worth it! I'm now with a guy that loves me regardless. And anyway the more important thing at the end of the day is how you feel, if you accept your body.
Give your boyfriend a chance to look after you instead of shutting him out, how can he help if he doesn't know what's going on?
Sometimes a good way to look at these things is to imagine if it was a physical health problem, if you had a cold you would let him look after you & your mental health is just as important sweetie x