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Fairy tale couples vs reality couples
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hi there, I’m sarah and I’m a volunteer peer advisor on askTheSite. I was helping out with TheSite relationships week on their facebook page a few weeks ago and it got me thinking about how we grow to learn about romantic relationships and what to expect from them.
I wanted to ask people whether there is a fictional couple that has affected their view of relationships or just given them something to think about or hope for?
I know for me when I was a teenager, it was definitely Monica and Chandler from Friends! I know now that that kind of relationship is pretty much out of reach (plus you only ever see the happy milestones in their relationship and not all the boring bits) but when I was younger I remember feeling wistful about it. It seemed such a smooth process from being friends to falling in love to getting married that I couldn't help envy them!
I wonder how much media plays a role in giving people false expectations of relationships? Would love to hear your thoughts...and post your pictures too!
I wanted to ask people whether there is a fictional couple that has affected their view of relationships or just given them something to think about or hope for?
I know for me when I was a teenager, it was definitely Monica and Chandler from Friends! I know now that that kind of relationship is pretty much out of reach (plus you only ever see the happy milestones in their relationship and not all the boring bits) but when I was younger I remember feeling wistful about it. It seemed such a smooth process from being friends to falling in love to getting married that I couldn't help envy them!
I wonder how much media plays a role in giving people false expectations of relationships? Would love to hear your thoughts...and post your pictures too!
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Hey...I can't really think of any fictional couples of my own, but i kind of disagree about Monica & Chandlers relationship being easy and seamless.
As i remember it they got together almost by accident when drunk, and then kept it a secret for a long time cos they were both so insecure about it. He was scared of commitment, she was a bit of a neat/control freak.
Sure they lived happily ever after in the end but they had a lot of bumps in the road and that's probably why people rooted for them...It wasn't a fairytale (mainly because fairytales aren't that funny :d)
I happen to believe that a lot of the "romantic drama" films do portray a seriously innacurate view of relationships. The big grand gesture/declaration of love and all that, i think most people show their affection in far more discreet/less lame ways.....
I can't think of any fictional couples though... maybe when I read the Twilight books a few years ago I wanted to be like Bella and Edward, but I've seen past the sparkley vampire phase now
It was one of those despite everything it kind of worked for them stories - made me think there might be hope.
http://25.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_m37qyeiZty1qje0q4o1_500.gif
(from submarine)
There's nothing fairytale about them.
It looks at movie romances and asks, would they really last? http://www.timeout.com/london/film/movie-romances-would-they-really-last
The first paragraph says:
I totally agree that most rom-coms bang on about the pursuit of 'The One' and don't really show much about what happens a few years down the line.
They're my favvvvourite
Just look at the movie Speed. Keanu and Sandra fall in love, 3 years later in Speed 2 she's with some other bloke.
Shrek came closest to lampooning happy ever after, but even that wasn't great at it.
I watched that with my mum who wasn't impressed on the basis of the Montague's being 'too shouty.'
For being a false representation?
of love or Shakespeare's r and j
haha- I love their beach shirts. the capulets also had style!
What was cool about them? Do you want a relationship like there's?
No, but, it sometimes feels that way. Picc and I have known each other for years, but it was her breaking her leg at just the right time that brought us together...
People love a good relationships 'getting together' story
Have you seen French Film? (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0986230/) It takes it to the extreme, but did make me think about relationship narratives and how we perceive them - the importance of storytelling in our personal relationships and the value we place on it in terms of recognising what has helped us to bond. I guess the key is to keep identifying new stories at key points as relationships develop.
Is that a hint?
I definitely think Shikari would suit the Nancy role :thumb:
I don't believe in fate but it really does feel like it sometimes. I met Dr Roll for the first time the day after I accepted the job in London and knew I was moving away. Sure it was off a dating website, it wasn't totally random, but we were just meeting as mates. I genuinely didn't see her like that. We've both decided we wouldn't have clicked if I'd been staying in the north east, Sod's Law dictating that as much as anything.
I think many relationships start in surprising ways because you can't force relationships. I know many friends whose relationships have started after they acted out of character or made an impulsive decision to go out and do something. I don't think it is "fate" but it shows that you cannot often construct meaningful relationships out of a formula.
Real life is not the same as reel life but, then again no harm in dreaming and believing in miracles. If you see movies like serendipity of when harry met sally, you'll believe.
They do, that's called "HOPE". Life can be really grim if we go on living in reality only, we need to have fairy tales, love stories, miracles, magic and above all.
There are many artists who haven not been in successful relationship themselves but, not all of them portray the same in their work, writing, painting, songs, etc. coz' world needs hope.
But, then what do I know, I'm just a hopeless romantic and a dreamer. :d