If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Options
Caring for dad
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hey
Dads been in and out of hospital this past year, He's spent ages in intensive care, I've been so close to loosing him, I blame myself. Whenever I'm caring for him he's fine, well as fine as he can be I guess, as soon as he starts to go all strange and he has one of his episodes. (An episode usually consits of shaking really fast, vommiting and then heart pain) I can usually stop it straight away before it gets really serious to the point he needs to be Resuscitated in hospital.
But whenever I'm not there he has them really bad and ends up in intensive care or something, I went to london for a couple of days and he ended up in Intensive care, I went to a friends sleepover and he ended up in intensive care, I went home an hour earlier then I normally do and you get the story eh.
I can't be there 24/7 its practically impossible for me to be especially since I DON'T live with him. But I feel like I have to be..
Its just so hard..
Dads been in and out of hospital this past year, He's spent ages in intensive care, I've been so close to loosing him, I blame myself. Whenever I'm caring for him he's fine, well as fine as he can be I guess, as soon as he starts to go all strange and he has one of his episodes. (An episode usually consits of shaking really fast, vommiting and then heart pain) I can usually stop it straight away before it gets really serious to the point he needs to be Resuscitated in hospital.
But whenever I'm not there he has them really bad and ends up in intensive care or something, I went to london for a couple of days and he ended up in Intensive care, I went to a friends sleepover and he ended up in intensive care, I went home an hour earlier then I normally do and you get the story eh.
I can't be there 24/7 its practically impossible for me to be especially since I DON'T live with him. But I feel like I have to be..
Its just so hard..
0
Comments
He can only get worse...which is hard
Being a young carer is such a responsibility. Does your dad have any other official care apart from you? Do you get any respite care so you can take some time off, for example? It's really important for ANY carer to get time away, but especially for young carers. It's natural that you feel bad for being away, but it's also super important that you get to do normal things with friends of your own age.
Can you talk to someone about all this and try and arrange for extra care for your dad? Or are there any other family members who could help out more regularly?
I think I read that you are in touch with a young carers charity in another thread, but you might find Carers Trust helpful if you haven't already seen it. This page on respite care tells you how to ask for more help.
Spanner *hug*
The only respite I have is when I go home at 11...
I do use youngcarersnet
I remember Macmilan doing a webchat on youngcarersnet..they gave loads of help and advise and stuff..
Have you tried speaking to your local council? I used to work for the Homecare section in one of the big councils and they were able to set up a homecare plan to give carers a break, even if it was for a couple of hours a week. I can't be sure if the system is the same for all councils but where I was working, they would look at the finances of the person receiving care and would be able to charge what is considered a fair price by how much income that person was receiving per week.
I have never experienced caring for someone but I used to hear so much in my time there that I can appreciate how difficult it is. A lot of carers also used to say, even though they had a couple of hours/days break a week that it helped massively.
Sorry if this is no help to you otherwise as it's just a suggestion but I hope you can resolve something and avoid burning yourself out. Good luck.