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I think i'm a lesbian...
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Its weird i don t want to be a lesbian but its like i have no choice, I don't have sexual feelings for men! I can't help how i feel and i have never admitted i am but i just dont know if this is a faze im going through or its just who i am. Looking back i have only had crushes on women! I juts didn't realise it Anyone else the same?!
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Basically, what I'm trying to say is that I've been there, you don't have to act upon your only being attracted to women until you are ready. Sexuality can be fluid and I wouldn't try to box yourself in too soon - because you might meet a guy you're really interested in at some point in the future; afterall you fall in love with a person... not their gender.
I hope that helped
:yes:
Why do you say you 'don't want to be a lesbian'? Do you mean that simply in the sense that it's beyond your control, or are you saying that there is something about being attracted to women that you actively don't want?
My family for instance were about as epic as epic could be when I came out. But I've been on the receiving end of some abuse too, I was holding hands with my girlfriend and some guys shouted abuse.
I bet, on a personal note, that what you're going through with your gender dismorphia is rough as rough comes. But I know many many sex changers (?!), and they're good people, and happy people, and basically that's what it comes down to. Gay or straight, male or female, or somewhere strange and hard to describe in between, so long as you're true to yourself, you'll be alright.
I'm speaking from point of view of a man who gave up job and moved in with a woman who later came out. Hurt doesn't begin to describe it.
Yup, I agree with Fiend.
Also, JavaKrypt is right; all relationships have complications, and can you be sure your family would accept any guy you brought home? There are loads of stories about families who have had a real problem with gay people until they realised they had a gay child. Living it Out by Sarah and Rachel Hagger-Holt is a really good resource; it's written for Christians but a lot of the issues raised are universal.
I know gay couples in all sorts of family relationships, all they have in common is that they have amazing kids who are really well-rounded and happy.