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Why can't i find a decent guy? Do i have sucker written all over my face?
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
this is bullshit - everything happens for a reason.
if thats the case, why did my ex cheat on me. why did he tell me he loved me and then chose her. why cant i just find a decent guy.
i know im young. i am only 16 but i loved him. my best friend said we were perfect for eachother. i thought we were. i love him with all my heart. he was my first love. but was i the only one in love? did i deserve this?
i never saw him, he lives in somerset, i live in ilfracombe, 2 hours away. i miss him so much but i know i can never trust him.
all men fuck me about. are there any decent guys out there? i cant find any. is it to much to ask?
all i want is not to be fucked over by some guy that bullshits every second.
if thats the case, why did my ex cheat on me. why did he tell me he loved me and then chose her. why cant i just find a decent guy.
i know im young. i am only 16 but i loved him. my best friend said we were perfect for eachother. i thought we were. i love him with all my heart. he was my first love. but was i the only one in love? did i deserve this?
i never saw him, he lives in somerset, i live in ilfracombe, 2 hours away. i miss him so much but i know i can never trust him.
all men fuck me about. are there any decent guys out there? i cant find any. is it to much to ask?
all i want is not to be fucked over by some guy that bullshits every second.
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Comments
Worry about stuff like clothes and hair and make up and stuff, not if you're ever going to find a decent guy. When your 40 and have been single all that time, then its time to worry. For now, just enjoy being a teenager and being young because it doesnt last forever and you dont want to look back think 'wow, i just wasted all my time on him and for what?' If he doesnt care then neither should you
Why do you think you need him?
Out of interest how many guys have you dated other than him, is he your first love?
Whatever age you are, being cheated on feels like utter crap and you’re bound to feel rubbish for a while.
As well as dealing with the grief that the relationship has ended, you’ve also got the shock of it ending so quickly. And it’s natural to still love him, even if he did wrong. Feelings don’t turn on and off like a light switch which can be ruddy confusing.
But try not to think of his cheating as something you could have prevented/influenced/be in any way responsible for. He was the one who did wrong – try and remember that. He should be the one feeling bad and questioning himself, not you.
Unfortunately, as clichéd as it sounds, time is what you need right now. Time to bawl your eyes out, time to make bitter comments about him with your mates, time to heal. It will get better, but it doesn’t happen overnight. These two articles may help in the meantime...
Mending a broken heart
Accepting it’s over
As for worrying about not finding a nice guy – your fellow board users are right that your age may have something to do with it. But that doesn’t mean all 16-18 year-old boys are horrible cheats. There will be some good eggs out there. Could you perhaps look for boys in different places? Do you have any hobbies? Go to any clubs? If not, it might be worth broadening your horizons a bit.
Also, much as it’s great to be in a relationship, it’s not essential. And if there aren’t any potential nice ‘uns around at the moment, why not try working on the relationship with yourself? Spend time working out how to make yourself happy. That will put you in a much stronger position for potentially meeting someone new and worthy of you.
As I said though, the healing will take time. And the boards are here whenever you need them.
Massive hugs *hug**hug*
Holly
ive been with 2 other people, but tbh i didnt love them.. so yeah he is my first true love
thanks everyone for your advice. seeing my friends today made me think maybe i dont need him but i just want what we had. hopefully ill find someone someday. but for now ill focus on my a-level work and slowly forget about him.
thanks again. x
A couple of my exs' I still love to bits, because they are lovely people and we parted on amicable terms, but it doesnt mean Im still IN love with them. You will heal and get stronger over time.
yeah. i am. at least i think i am..