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The Bitter End
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Myself and my ex spoke on Friday afternoon where we closed out a protracted break-up with an exchange of nastiness and spite. I have to say that, for my part, there were two reasons for being drawn into this exchange. Firstly, she crossed a line by targeting a sensitive issue and in doing so made me extremely angry. Secondly, I almost wanted to make things terminal, because any chance of salvation would just keep redundant hope alive. So we both said some pretty cruel things and it's over now. Do I regret what I said? Not really, no. I feel she messed me around for the longest time. It was means to an end, and perhaps we can both move on now. I used to think that ending on good terms was the only way I could live with myself, but I feel acutely different at this moment. I feel better now than I did when I tried to end things on good terms. I feel like I've finally been true to my feelings instead of trying to make it easier for her to have torn me up.
I'm looking for any stories of others here, about break-ups that have ended in an explosion of resentment and/or nastiness? Any regrets? Or did you feel it was cathartic and helped you to let go? Any funny stories on this theme?
I'm looking for any stories of others here, about break-ups that have ended in an explosion of resentment and/or nastiness? Any regrets? Or did you feel it was cathartic and helped you to let go? Any funny stories on this theme?
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What sort of things did you say to each other? You seem too nice on here to come out with acerbic vitriol but, I do believe you.
I did so much for that girl, and she repaid me with lies and more lies. I am usually nice, but as with most emotionally turbulent people I am capable of losing perspective if hurt enough. It's something I try to keep a handle on, as I respect myself much more for being a decent person and rising above. On this particular occasion, however, I feel it was needed. Something dramatic needed to happen to break the hold, and that has been achieved. I know that we can't repair what was said, and I need to know that to be able to let go and move on.
x
ditto, same goes for friends.
if people treat you badly and often enough, that's all you really can do.
Logically I knew that this was bull, but I was so shocked that he had said it that I just walked out of the house and never went back. I wish now that I had stood up for myself - it sounds like that's exactly you did, so if you don't regret it, move on and be proud that you were true to what you needed to do.
Thank god he's gone.
Ugh, that in itself is disgusting. That people can be so ignorant, it never ceases to amaze me. As I've said above, I've always believed that there are lines which you just do not cross when it comes to an argument, no matter how heated. Picking on deeply personal issues is something that is beyond vindictive, it's almost inhuman. At least I'm proud that I didn't go there, unfortunately my ex did.
Thanks to everyone who has replied so far, it's all been very helpful in rationalising things. I can't express enough the value of forums like this one in simply making sense of things that we go through. Thanks all
I had the same thing! Plus choice phrases like 'you need to get over your dad's death' and 'You need to stand up for yourself' when I was being picked on by an old housemate. Ridiculous. If he had any backbone or indeed penis he would have told the male house mate to sod off himself!
Grrrr.
back to thread... i agree with butterflykisses, sometimes it does take something with shock value for you to realise what a douche they are and to walk away.