I really need some help...

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
Basically I am a first year uni student who was messed up all my exams, and I got my days mixed up and missed an exam also...I really don't know what to do. I couldn't get myself motivated to do anything for them, and hence really didn't have a clue how to answer the questions.

At the start of the Semester I really worked hard and was so conscientious...but then towards the end I started skipping lectures because I was constantly too tired to go. I was even skipping tutorials too, because they scared the shit out of me, despite already having got help from one of my tutors to try and conquer my fear.

Will I be able to repeat my modules? I'm so scared and am dreading going back.

Sorry for the rant guys, I really don't do 'sharing my feelings' with people unless I REALLY have to, and thanks again in advance for any advice.

capo2

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    hmm...Dont really know what advice to give mate. Just get yourself down to the course leaders office and explain what you've just written here. Chances are you will have to resit the 1st year. But that may not be so bad, work for a few months, get a bit of life experience - maybe it will help you get over your fear.. (shyness??)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    As for missing lectures, you're not on your own. So many people do it it's unreal. Including me..I tend to miss more than I go to. It's really hard to motivate yourself when it's so easy just to stay in bed or whatever. Being in your first year though, as I am, it's an awful lot to adjust and get used to. You're still settling in to your surroundings etc.

    If you're positive you've failed the exams, along with the ones you've missed, I'd go and speak to your personal tutor. It's not that easy, and it takes effort to make the first step, but just explain how you've found the work hard, and adjusting to this new environment hard. To be honest, if you don't want to make the first move and talk to your tutor, s/he will most likely come to you if you've failed all of your exams to see what the problem is, anyway.

    In most cases, you should be able to resit all of your exams if need be, but you may well have to pay this time around. Of course, this does depend on your University and the way in which they operate, though.

    The important thing to remember is you're not the only one. I'm doing my exams now and will probably be in the same situation this time next week!

    Good luck mate. :thumb:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Get yourself over to your tutor, plead terrified/disorganised/panicked/trouble adjusting first year and incompetance.

    Your options will vary course to course, uni to uni so we can't really help on the details. In a lot of places you can resit January modules, either in June or in August sometime so don't give up hope yet.

    Everyone gets worn down towards to the end of the semester, people get tired and the novelty has worn off. The challenge now is can you pick up the pace again to make the rest of the year work.

    Having had the fresher type life at the start of the year you now need to settle down into more of a routine, balancing academic work, paid work if you have a job and your social life/clubs/hobbies. A good way to do it is to do a rough block time table. Mine in the first year looked a bit like this for Monday/Tuesday:

    Monday am: Lectures/Labs
    Monday pm: Work on problem sheets/lab write ups
    Monday Eve: Rev and then crash out/tidy up/wash up etc

    Tuesday am: Lectures/Labs
    Tuesday pm: Laundry and problem sheets
    Tuesday early eve: Tutorial
    Tuesday eve: Dinner with team mates then training, some more work if lab in on Wednesday, if not pub after training.

    Right through to Friday/Saturday.

    Friday night: Go out
    Sat am: Sleep in ( unless competeing)
    Sat lunch: brunch in canteen (*will* get arse out of bed in time for that)
    Sat pm: Proper tidy up and sort out

    If you can do that kind of thing it helps you plan how you use your time and motivate yourself to things at a certain time because you know you've got other stuff to do at other times.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thanks again guys, the advice in here is always great :) It's nice to know it's not just me that's finding it incredibly tough at times!

    capo2
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You know where we are, and there are plenty of us here that have had all sorts of problems at uni and are more than happy to try and help.

    Good luck for talking to your tutor.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Awwww that's so nice, it's so appreciated guys :D

    K, so I emailed my lecturer for the module I've missed, and unsurprisingly again he hasn't replied. It's a tiny course and he knows who I am, which makes it even more annoying. As for the tutor, don't even go there, she's not a nice person, neither is the one for my history course. There's one tutor I would go to, but I've already been to him twice, I think a third time would be takin' the p*ss a bit would it not?

    capo2
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Nope, going to him again would not be taking the piss in the slightest. If you've got someone that knows a bit of your history and that you get on with then they are definitely the best person to go to.

    (But you knew that really) ;)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    capo2 wrote: »
    Awwww that's so nice, it's so appreciated guys :D

    K, so I emailed my lecturer for the module I've missed, and unsurprisingly again he hasn't replied. It's a tiny course and he knows who I am, which makes it even more annoying. As for the tutor, don't even go there, she's not a nice person, neither is the one for my history course. There's one tutor I would go to, but I've already been to him twice, I think a third time would be takin' the p*ss a bit would it not?

    capo2
    Not at all. Tutors are there for you to turn to when you need them. If you've alrady been to him twice, you obviously trust him and feel you can talk about what'd bothering you. Go and tell him what you need to; he can advise you from there.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Just want to say I had the exact same problem with anxiety, I would be worried about going out and so in the end stayed in all the time. This term I decided to turn over a new leaf though, and now my first week of seminars etc. I have caught the flu (quite badly) so have been emailing seminar leaders telling them I can't attend. Not the best start! But if I can try to do it so can you :). Just give yourself a little mental reward for every lecture you go to. Even if you sit there and don't understand any of it, the fact that you've got up, gone to your lecture and stayed there for the whole time will make you feel better.

    Sometimes when I'm a few minutes late for a lecture and it's already started I panic and run (well walk very quickly) back home because I just... I dunno. It's like a fear in my head that I don't have control over, and I feel awful later like I'm failing and I'm stupid, but I dunno. Ugh.

    I hate flu :(
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hey capo. Course leaders and tutors are there to help you. They don't like to have people failing. It doesn't look good on the Uni so it's in their interests to help you. If you're not getting support from people, then don't be afraid to go above them. If you don't like talking, write it all down and personally hand it to them. First year can be overwhelming but you can get out of this vicious spiral with the right help. Try making an official appointment to talk to someone in the faculty/dept; they don't always take things too seriously when it comes in by email from what I remember.

    I know what it's like to be petrified about tutorials and stuff. If, like me, it's the fear of being put on the spot, then speak to your lecturer. I failed some modules in my early years of Uni because I missed tutorials or fell asleep (a weird defence mechanism I have) in them. In my final year, I spoke to my lecturer about this and so he only asked me to speak out when I volunteered an answer.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    You'll probably be allowed to resit the year if you've done really badly as well.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thanks again so much, again it'll probably take me a couple of days to actually build myself up to email him, but it's worth a try. Retaking the year wouldn't look good on me, my parents would probably go nuts to be honest. I really have to catch a grip and sort this because otherwise it's jus going to get worse and worse.

    Again, it's great to know that there are others who are quite frankly terrified about tutorials, and even lectures, too. 99% of all people I speak to at uni are fine with them, but they scare the crap out of me, it's just such an intimidating situation!

    capo2
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    capo2 wrote: »
    Thanks again so much, again it'll probably take me a couple of days to actually build myself up to email him, but it's worth a try. Retaking the year wouldn't look good on me, my parents would probably go nuts to be honest. I really have to catch a grip and sort this because otherwise it's jus going to get worse and worse.

    Again, it's great to know that there are others who are quite frankly terrified about tutorials, and even lectures, too. 99% of all people I speak to at uni are fine with them, but they scare the crap out of me, it's just such an intimidating situation!

    capo2

    :yes: and I understand how it's embarrassing, because you think it's idiotic yourself, and can't imagine what other people think. I've got to the door of the lecture theatre before and then turned round, gone home and spent the next hour chastising myself for not going.

    I think the worst bit about seminars for my subject (Maths) is sometimes they ask the students to do worked problems on the blackboard. And I have no clue... whereas it seems a fair few of the others do.

    We'll get through this together! :D

    Oh and as for parents, well my mum still thinks I should have gone to Cambridge (I got ABC at a levels but she doesn't realise that matters... and thinks if I worked harder I would have been fine :yeees:), but just sod them, it's your life, especially now, do what you want and what makes you happy. Easier said than done, I know :( but best of luck xxx
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Would you tell people you barely knew at uni you were shit scared to tutorials? No probably not, and I suspect a fair few of the people who say they are cool with them are lying.

    Get it touch with the tutor NOW, the sooner the better.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Have found out that all modules can be repeated...thank God!! Will still have to see tutors and examination officers about them, but at least I know that I have another chance...the relief is unreal!!

    All my tutors and lecturers are very into the whole 'If you have any problems, and I mean ANY PROBLEMS AT ALL, don't hesitate to come and see me!' type of thing this semester, and they are really stressing it more than usual, which has calmed my head a bit too.

    Did anyone have exams that went a bit pear-shaped too?

    capo2
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Last year I outright failed all of mine and they couldn't be repeated!

    These things happen and if you've got the right attitude can usualy be dealt with.

    Things are sounding pretty hopeful, good luck with this semester, and take your tutors advice, try and keep on top of work and go and talk to people as soon as anything niggles or you don't quite understand it completely rather than waiting for things to reach panic point again.

    xx
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Well...failed everything...which will mean a hell of a work load for August. I was hoping I'd pass at least one...!! Not to sound depressing but am feeling a bit disheartened at the moment, there was one I thought I had a good chance of passing in, but that was the one I did the worst in.

    capo2
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hiya Capo,

    Don't be too upset, at least you knew this was coming and you have already set about finding out how and when you can resit. You now have a goal to aim for and know where you are going wrong. If you really didn't care you wouldn't have found that information out already.

    Your tutor said you should go and see him if you had any problems at all- why don't you pay them a visit and talk through some strategies for getting on with your work. I'm sure they will be more than willing to give you some advice.

    Don't worry, you can do it. :yes:

    Hmm where is the hug icon? Here's a hug as well.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Try not to take it too badly, Uni exams are hard things to get your head around. What you need to do now is start trying to work out where you went wrong. If you thought you'd done ok and you actuallly did badly it may be a question of technique. Take your tutors up on their offers of help and ask ask away. Make sure you understand the stuff you're being taught now AND how you'd answer questions on it in an exam. You need to try and get it to exam level as you go along, rather than at the end of the term/semester.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thanks guys, I took a deep breath at the end of my lecture there and went to see the lecturer, because it's a fairly small group. I wasn't going to, but I'm not going to get anywhere not doing anything about it so I did. It was the subject that I thought I would have passed, and he was so nice and more than happy to help. He basically said that it wasn't the end of the world and that it's more than do-able, not to panic, and if I needed anymore help to just ask. I feel a bit better now. :)

    capo2
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