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Is Lonliness worth celebrating?
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Should Lonliness be celebrated or whatever is the opposite of celebrate?
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Erm if being lonely is a good thing then yeah sure celebrate it, but imo i wouldn't be too happy if i was lonely.
Bit of a weird thing to think, why do you ask?
Loneliness is a problem that the person who is lonely creates- loneliness is sad for these people because they want friends and social interaction and they don't have it. Society doesn't create loneliness, people who are lonely create it.
Some people are happy and comfortable in their own company, and society doesn't stigmatise them.
People should be happy; some people want 100 friends, and some people want to be by themselves.
People can be lonely in the middle of a crowded room.
but i would say that although it seems that there is a stigma, its made to seem worse by those who feel lonely.
loneliness isnt a definate bad thing, it can be good too. at this moment in time, im not quite sure how, but im almost positive some good must come out of it.
just thought id lighten the mood
anyway it depends on the person, if someone is outgoing then loneliness will bother them but if your a solitaty person then it wont bother you. I describe myself as a solitary person but I do get lonely from time to time.
just asking: this a split up type of lonely?
i think 'aloneness' ( for want of a better word) is definitely something to be celebrated- im quite a solitary person myself and love my own company. Being alone also gives yourself time to BE yourself- without the subconscious influence of others.. and you can just do your own thang really.
but lonliness is a negative thing- id hate to be lonely.
but as i said theres a definite difference.
It's cool though, I'd rather have one or two people that really get me.
this influence drove me to obsession.
I absolutely hate seeing people on their own in pubs, cinema, out for dinner. but my friends always say they are probably fine on their own, and that they'd probably sit on their own rather than have me waddle over and pester them. i was in the pub the other day and a bloke about 20 or so was sat on his own before the football started, everyone else our age were in big groups sitting around, laughing giggling, chanting etc, and he looked so low. i asked my boyfriend to go and see if he wanted to join them in a half serious half jokey way, and he said he would be ok, and shortly after, the bloke left the pub.
it was so sad from my view, but from everyone elses, and probably his, it was ok.
it makes me well up just thinking about it.
i dont really know why i am writing this, it just sorta happened!
This is just my humble opinion but its the only thing that makes sense to me.
What the fuck?
My house doesn't have its own real ale bar, it doesn't have its own cinema system, it doesn't have its own concert venue and it doesn't have its own football stadium.
I've eaten out alone, I've been to the pictures alone, I've drank in bars alone, I've been to the football alone. It doesn't mean that I'm desperate for the company of others, because I happen to quite enjoy my own. It means there was something that I wanted to do, and I went and did it. I actually quite like sitting in pubs and coffee shops alone with a good book, saying little, just watching the world go by.
- i completely agree
I really admire those people who can actually DO things on their own because they want to without giving a fuck what everyone else thinks.
i remember once i was in the cinema with my dad and 2 sisters and 1 brother and we'd all squabbled over what film to watch for ages and then we all eventually traipsed in to screen 5 to see some shitty film. but before it started i remember seeing this guy on his own reading a book before the film started and then he watched his film- i just remember thinking 'what a cool guy'- he seemed so intellectual. he was doing his own thing.
so now ive started doing my own thing as well- i LOVE seating on the beach in brighton reading a book or going round london.. it may seem sad to other people but i like my own company and being alone with my thoughts. some people 'on their own' are obviously lonely but some arent and shouldnt be pitied.
For me it is sorta opposite, most of the time im feeling loney, i feel loney now and in turn makes me feel so low. When I am alone but want company, yet i feel i cant leave the house because of the stigma there is. I could never go to a pub, cinema, resturant alone, as i always be concious about what people think of me. What Bunny_0_ said is exatcly what i want to avoid, someone noticing how lonely i am.
All i did was offer my opinion on something, Which ive been trying to do more lately, fine screw it Im off.
Damn you just said everything I was gonna say .. :wave:
I've gone to the movie on my own a few times - last time was when I had 16 hours before a flight at Gatwick so I sat onmy owna nd watched 2 movies ina row - certainly a lot more productive then sitting at the airport for 4 hours doing nothing.
Although years ago I went to see from Dusk til Dawn and got the shock of my life cos it was a spur of the moment decision and I knew nothing about the film and suddenly what I thought was a movie about bank robbers turned out to be about vampires .. lol
But yeah I also like to go places on my own a lot, if I want to do something with a group of people I have my mailinglist and can shoot off an email and can usually get a good group together - got something on in 4 days time and probably 20 or 30 people will show up. But then other times just want to do stuff on my own.
I also don't get the stigma about going alone to the movies. I don't exactly benefit a lot from sitting next to somebody in the dark for two hours.
I think it's a certain sign of personal strength when a person is able to do things on their own and enjoy the moment. Sometimes it's better to take somebody with you, at other times it isn't really. I'd rather go alone than take somebody with me who would like to go home right from the start (been there done that).
Firefly: No need to get offended. I don't doubt that some people see things like you do, but those who don't see it that way also have a right to disagree and explain why.
PLUS i can never remember what i've just seen anyway so afterwards it's just a case of well yeh i know you've seen what i've just seen so needless we go there.
Some people like the alone time and quite enjoy spending time thinking things over and shit.
Some people might just be new to a place and not have any friends yet, does that mean they can't go out of the house.
And how does a lonely person look like?
You might see an old times sitting in a pub sipping on his IPA looking at the world go by because he's recently lost his wife and has got nothing else to do.
Some people like to go to the park and talk to the pigeons.
On the other hand some people like to make themselves feel better by imagining that the "others" are lonely and they are not.
Being lonely is not a disease or an illness, it's just life.
If I'm clothes shopping, I prefer it on my own! I cant stand waiting around for other peole in the changing rooms and going to millions of shops that I dont want to go to.
I also like reading in a quiet corner of a pub on my own, having food etc.
Being alone is only a problem if you arent happy with it.
True. I've been lonely (like somebody said, it's possible in a large group of people) and I would never celebrate that. Being lonely is a certain feeling so when people say 'I'm lonely' it's a negative thing.
aww i feel sorry for people like that it makes me sad
as for loneliness - i have been single for ages but it doesnt really bother me when im around my friends they really keep me going, but sometimes when im alone i feel so lonely - even tho i have really great mates. So i think its that when i am actually alone i start thinking and then i get sad as i have no-one there to cheer me up.
And at a party a while ago i felt alone in a room full of people, it was because i was having probs with bf, and we split up that night...
sorry:(, i was only trying to put across my opinion too based on your post. didnt mean it bad in any way.