If you need urgent support, call 999 or go to your nearest A&E. To contact our Crisis Messenger (open 24/7) text THEMIX to 85258.
Options
Take a look around and enjoy reading the discussions. If you'd like to join in, it's really easy to register and then you'll be able to post. If you'd like to learn what this place is all about, head here.
Comments
I haven't.
I just said if I knew a girl who told me what you have then I probably wouldn't date her.
I don't blame him but i also lost all respect for him after the way he treated me.
OK, you've misunderstood me. Or I haven't put it down properly...
In any case, what I meant was....
Depends on why she cheated. If she cheated once FOR THAT REASON there's every chance she would do it again. To be specific, one of my friends was going out with a guy for a certain period of time. At one point they didn't see each other for a few weeks and she cheated on him with a guy that worked with her. When I asked her why, she said to me because she had chemistry with the other guy and it didn't really mean anything, it was just about sex. She never told her boyfriend and got pissed off at me when I told her that what she's done was wrong.
So suffice to say, I would never date her.
Even if it was a one-off and this was the first time she'd ever cheate on anyone?
I wanted to contribute to this discussion so I did, I can only use the information i'm given.
I don't see how I am judging people. I don't agree with the way they think, how does that mean i'm judging them? You disagree with the way I think about this, but are you judging me?
1. You can guarantee me that it's a one-off?
2. Why should I believe her that it's the first time? (cheating correlates directly to lying, if she is prepared to cheat, she is prepared to lie)
so you're seeing someone for a few weeks and you're starting to develop feelings for them. then you have a talk about past relationships and they say that they once cheated. are you telling me you'd actually say "oh right, well sorry but once a cheater always a cheater. you're dumped!" as if!
and just because someones never cheated before doesn't mean they they never will!
Hmmm, yes I do actually agree with that though. I really do think that no situation is an excuse to cheat. You say your situation did make it understandable, and that's fine, that's what you believe nad I have no problem with that. I just don't think I would ever use the situation I was in as an excuse. At the end of the day I would say that it was only me who allowed the cheating to happen. I can't think of any situation I would be in where I would have any blame on my partner for my actions, and i've been in some pretty awful situations before.
I'm finding it hard to write this in a way to not cause offence to you, as you've been in the situation and feel the way you feel so it is obviously a sensitive issue, but i'm honestly not trying to say you are wrong or trying to judge you. Please don't take what i'm saying as a personal attack on you, it's just the way I feel.
I am not generalizing.
I said it all depends on the situation and as to why she cheated.
I am a pretty good judge of character and i know she is prone to do it again.
Infact she has had about 4 dates with this guy and during that time slept twice with this Italian guy.
She is still my friend and I love her to bits, but i do think she is in the wrong.
I am not asking you or anyone to justify yourself. And it doesn't change my opinion of you, mainly coz I don't know you.
Also, I am not saying I would never go out with someone who has cheated before.
It's all about the WHY?
Surely if a guy said to you "I cheated on my ex because sex with her wasn't satisfying enough", you wouldn't want anything to do with him.
I am surrounded by friends who have cheated on their girlfriends and boyfriends repeatedly, yet my faith in fidelity is unpreturbed. Like a few have said, it ain't all black and white.
If it happened now then then I don't know what would happen, I do know that it would be a big issue for me and cause a lot of worry. It wouldn't be a case of saying "oh right, well sorry but once a cheater always a cheater. you're dumped!" but I do think I would end up finishing things. I just don't think I could be happy in that situation again.
True, just because someone hasn't cheated before doesn't mean they wont cheat in the future, but I wouldn't be concerned to the point of worrying about it if they'd never cheated before.
what was the reason?
dont get mad at people who dont wanna date a cheater that person who cheated should of not cheated anyway what can you blame people who wanna stay clear and not make the same mistake of giving a cheat a chance again?
if you wanna date a cheat go ahead no one stopping you but dont try to convince those who dont wanna date a cheater to give them a chance lol.
just my 2 cents
People learn from mistakes (sometimes) and circumstances change.
I've cheated on girls in the past but i wouldnt dream of doing it to the girl im with now, i love her to bits and wouldnt want to hurt her. The past girls though i just didnt really give a shit about...
:yes:
How do you know that? Not saying what she did is right or anything, but she could've had a reason to cheat on him...
wow what do you mean by that incestous are they having sex with there family?
thats gross why get involved with someone like that
She is one of my best friends.
She is neither young or stupid.
And she told me why she cheated on him.
I know that the underlaying reason for her cheating is that she doesn't trust men as far as she can throw em, she's been burnt a few times. Fair enough.
ya women like thta will cheat they are weakminded.
most guys cheat cause well they get tempted by other women and alot of men are weak when it comes tot he poon.
my ex had a guy who was with her for 3 years in highschool and she wanted to wait to have sex tilll marriage and he cheated on her with some girl close to him, and then she got in relationship with a guy she lost her virginity too but was being cold to her...i thought icould save her and show her im not like thoe guys i even told her never make your new guy pay for another mans sins...it was too late such a shame she became a dime a dozen gal now...she never trusted me and she has issues its a shame cause i tried and god knows i did but no matter what i said...the women around her would manipulate her and say all men ard dogs, and they knew she was cheated on before...i cant stand thoe kinda friends...
So you're saying it's a woman's fault a man cheats?:rolleyes: