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Am I making a huge mistake?
BillieTheBot
Posts: 8,721 Bot
I'm really sorry to have to keep going on about this. Yet again, it's about my university application. I've been talking over the last few weeks to people around me, friends and family. I had doubts about my application at the time I handed it in. These doubts have got stronger, not weaker as time has gone on. I've been told explicitly by a few people who know me that they do not believe I would be able to cope at university. For example, one (she shall remain nameless) said;
"I'm sorry to say this, Danny, but I don't think university is the right option. Frankly, you'll never cope. You're a complete mess in the head as it is, and uni would just trigger the detonator for you. You shouldn't be doing this, you're not fit for it. You weren't fit for it at 18, what makes you think you're up to it now?"
Obviously, such comments are pretty disillusioning. It relates to the fact I didn't go to uni after leaving college, because I would probably have committed suicide under such a strain. But I suspect she's got a point. To be perfectly frank, a side of me thinks that I'm about to make the biggest mistake of my life. And I haven't got a clue what to do next. :crying:
If anyone's got anything they can say to help or advise, I'll listen, I'll appreciate it.
"I'm sorry to say this, Danny, but I don't think university is the right option. Frankly, you'll never cope. You're a complete mess in the head as it is, and uni would just trigger the detonator for you. You shouldn't be doing this, you're not fit for it. You weren't fit for it at 18, what makes you think you're up to it now?"
Obviously, such comments are pretty disillusioning. It relates to the fact I didn't go to uni after leaving college, because I would probably have committed suicide under such a strain. But I suspect she's got a point. To be perfectly frank, a side of me thinks that I'm about to make the biggest mistake of my life. And I haven't got a clue what to do next. :crying:
If anyone's got anything they can say to help or advise, I'll listen, I'll appreciate it.
Beep boop. I'm a bot.
Post edited by JustV on
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Comments
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Personally I think you should go through with it, I'm sure you're capable of it if you stop letting your doubts become obstacles. If you're scared of things not working out then it's always good to remember that there's no shame in attempting something and it not working out. The shame's in not making the attempt at all.
That said, only you know whether this is right for you at this point in time, don't let anyone's opinion sway you unless it's the same as your own.
Also, in all honesty, I would perceive having to leave university as a personal failure. At first, I was going to university for loads of reasons... getting a degree, getting independence, moving away from home... I'm not even sure they're good reasons anymore.
as for emotional well-being, i think the only way you'll know if you're able to cope, is if you actually go and try. if you find it hard when you're there, you'll have a personal tutor, they'll be a counselling service, you'll have mates to talk to - there WILL be support for you.
and if you do go and find it isn't the right time for you, it isn't the end of the world. you may feel like it's a personal failure but it isn't because you'll have tried and will have learnt something from the experience.
if you don't give it a try, you'll never know.
ETA - the reasons you just put for going to uni are perfectly good, they are the reasons most people have. it's a whole new start.
If you never take any chances in life you'll never know what you can accomplish.
leaving home to go to uni is a scary and worrying experience for most people and it is tough at first. but then you make loads of new friends and have independence and no parents to answer to. its great stuff i was shitting it when i had to go live in france for a year but i look back on it now as one of the best experiences i've had.
what has been said already - u can do this if you want it enough. one person is telling you that you wouldnt cope and u choose to listen to the bitch, rather than the many people who have faith in u.
All these forms I keep receiving are bamboozling me as well, I keep being told about catered/self-catering concerning housing, as well as a whole heap of terms like dissertation. What the hell does that mean? Admittedly, you're pretty helpful in trying to understand this gobbledygook...
do you good to meet some nice new people.
just make sure to ignore the mean ones.
What? Mate, if you got four unconditional offers, then you must have some brains about you, yet you seem to be making this an awful lot more complicated than it needs to be. The forms are step by step things to do. The hardest part was the UCAS form or general application form, but that's behind you now. Like John_UK said (hi mate btw) you just need to go for it. Everything will sort itself out, and if I can do it, then it's not really all that complicated. I never even got four unconditionals ('2 unconditionals and one conditional), and I managed it.
Catered/self-catered, that's easy. You going to be cooking for yourself or going somewhere where food will be cooked for you (e.g. halls of residence)?The dissertation you don't need to worry about. By the time you have to do one, you'll know what it is.
My advice to you would be sit down for an hour and think really hard about it, and once you've decided, have the courage of your convictions and go through with it. To be honest, it shouldn't be as difficult a decision for you to make as it seems to be.
i think the same could be said of university, give it a go and enjoy yourself
anyways will give you a good chance to make friends with people that are very likely in the same situation as you are currently, or people who have been there and done that kinda thing
plus youd be able to ditch us internet saddos :thumb:
you need to stop worrying, though. most students are strapped for cash throughout their time at university - but it's part of uni life and there is help out there should you not be left with enough to eat. you can also get a job which would obviously help.
Hi
I dont know your personal situation, but I didnt go to uni straight from school because I didnt feel like I could have coped with it (I had a few problems at the time). I have applied this year (5 years later) and Im glad I did. I feel really nervous and wonder how I will cope but I am looking forward to it.
Maybe you're just a bit nervous about going?
Nat
Now, replies to comments left yesterday after I went offline... See above about some of this. I can't help but think if I was to cancel it, I'd be letting everybody down, including me. I have no idea how I've survived at London meets, I really don't. As for this site, me going to university is not going to stop me coming here. I'm going to be on the site for a long, long time. That's more or less the same situation as me, bar the time difference. (mine's 3 years) Am I nervous about going? Damn right I am.
Which isnt to say I think it will be a horrible mess, I dont think it will be if you can just stop stressing.
calm down dude, I'm sure you know full well that you're blowing everything way out of proportion!
nothing is anywhere near as bad or difficult as you make it out to be
Also, if you're going to halls it might be difficult for you if you don't blend in with the fellow residents. Especially if you've no other mates you can fall back on elsewhere on campus.
Only you know anyway.