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Fidelity?
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
Okay... hypothetical situation for you all..
If you had been in a loving relationship with someone for the best part of a year, who had had quite a few gf/bfs before you (15+), but you suddenly found out that he/she had cheated on the majority of them, would you lose any sense of trust for that person? Keeping in mind that they had waited 10+ months to tell you, and had always slated others for infidelity? And that these incidents of cheating followed no regular pattern - i.e. not just with girls/boys they've just got together with, but long-term (18 months+) partners too?
And do you believe a leopard could ever change it's spots?
If you had been in a loving relationship with someone for the best part of a year, who had had quite a few gf/bfs before you (15+), but you suddenly found out that he/she had cheated on the majority of them, would you lose any sense of trust for that person? Keeping in mind that they had waited 10+ months to tell you, and had always slated others for infidelity? And that these incidents of cheating followed no regular pattern - i.e. not just with girls/boys they've just got together with, but long-term (18 months+) partners too?
And do you believe a leopard could ever change it's spots?
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Comments
I do believe that leopards can change their spots!! I do believe that I changed mine so why shouldn't others!!
and what if this partner had accused you of cheating a number of times (without evidence or even cause for concern)? would this also be showing their guilt from past-cheating/insecurites from being cheated on (once)?
In this situation, how did the person suddenly find out? Was it from the guy or another person?
Def smells fishy. When I was being cheated on, I said something to my ex like, "Ooh, who are you going out to impress?" And he went nuts. Accused me of thinking he was cheating (when he was) and then tried to make out I was cheating on him, because I was 'keeping my phone hidden' etc :rolleyes:
As I said though, depends on the person.
non cheaters may actually cheat once or twice, but they'll either be in a bad situation with the current relationship, or it'll be an accident, they'll be totally gutted about it and they'll never do it again.
cheaters may appear to change their spots, but as soon as a relationship gets difficult, they'll jump back into bed with mr/ms bit on the side.
cheaters occasionally become non-cheaters, but in my experience it's incredibly rare.