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Life
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
I don't want to bore you with my problems but I just want to seek some advice. Its come to the point where I have just had the compelling need to let this out instead of constantly thinking on my own. Where to start?
Well, Im currently a uni student and I'm having money troubles and alcohol problems. My current overdraft is bigger than you need to know, my credit card is maxed and I have to fork out £400 odd in June to pay the first installment for my shared house next year.
Theres also this girl (you probably expected this), I get along with her pretty well, like were always joking and bein sarcy with one another etc etc and I have a thing for her. Im starting to think about it more and more now, however, I dont want to make the mistakes I have before, so i'm holding back and biding time , I suppose.
I don't know why but I just feel really lonely and I also feel tired all the time. I have some very good friends at uni but its as though somethings missing. Ive never really been in a good relationship and I dont know if Im trying to clutch at something between me and this girl. I dont want to wreck being friends over this.
Theres then the alcohol, the amount I can stomach now is horrendous and I can't seem to stop it. I tell myself I will but then I just feel I need to socialise otherwise I will get lonely. But the alcohol is probably ruining my degree (im glad im only in the first year), being on a course as intensive as this difficult.
I don't really know what to do, I just feel like my life is becoming a bit of a mess. I had to move out of home before I got here and my dad is now engaged. I guess I just feel a bit distant from parents and hang on closely to my friends. This is probably making me try too hard to land in a relationship. I'm always tired as well.
Can someone please offer their advice. Say if uve been in a similar situation.
I think i may see a doctor, but I feel such an idiot blabbing about my problems and I can see the doctor not giving a toss.
Any advice would be great...
Steve
Well, Im currently a uni student and I'm having money troubles and alcohol problems. My current overdraft is bigger than you need to know, my credit card is maxed and I have to fork out £400 odd in June to pay the first installment for my shared house next year.
Theres also this girl (you probably expected this), I get along with her pretty well, like were always joking and bein sarcy with one another etc etc and I have a thing for her. Im starting to think about it more and more now, however, I dont want to make the mistakes I have before, so i'm holding back and biding time , I suppose.
I don't know why but I just feel really lonely and I also feel tired all the time. I have some very good friends at uni but its as though somethings missing. Ive never really been in a good relationship and I dont know if Im trying to clutch at something between me and this girl. I dont want to wreck being friends over this.
Theres then the alcohol, the amount I can stomach now is horrendous and I can't seem to stop it. I tell myself I will but then I just feel I need to socialise otherwise I will get lonely. But the alcohol is probably ruining my degree (im glad im only in the first year), being on a course as intensive as this difficult.
I don't really know what to do, I just feel like my life is becoming a bit of a mess. I had to move out of home before I got here and my dad is now engaged. I guess I just feel a bit distant from parents and hang on closely to my friends. This is probably making me try too hard to land in a relationship. I'm always tired as well.
Can someone please offer their advice. Say if uve been in a similar situation.
I think i may see a doctor, but I feel such an idiot blabbing about my problems and I can see the doctor not giving a toss.
Any advice would be great...
Steve
0
Comments
minus the moving out of home and uni thing
i'm 22 should have gone to uni. but the girl situation and alcohol thing is exactly the same
i can drink and drink and drink, then when I don't or have to stay in or something i feel as tho i'm incredibly lonely, or that I'm missing out on the social event of the century by staying in.
i reckon that maybe the alcohol problem isn't that your addicted to the drink
more the social aspects of going out and getting drunk with mates
at least thats what I tell myself, who knows...maybe i'm right?
if money worries really are getting you down, have you thought of applying to the Access to Learning Fund? Your uni should have some information, but they can help you with some extra money if your situation warrants it
as for the loneliness- yes, i understand how you're feeling. how often do you visit home?
show me one student that doesn't.
you say you are doing it for ''socializing'' - cut back and don't go out every night. the problem comes if you are drinking on your own or to drown out your thoughts etc. - being a student is naturally a drink heavy thing.
i don't know what year of uni you are in but usually once the initial 1st semester wears off, a lot of students find themselves in a similar situation.
just a little bit of self discipline could probably help you no end.
also, if you've got severe financial problems then see your union asap.
Thats a bit of a silly thing to say.
When i was a student i was of course poor, but i was sensible and didnt exceed my overdraft, and managed to survive.
I liked to get drunk, but i regulated myself and didnt have an alcohol problem.
So i've shown you one that doesnt.
To the op, if your having serious money problems then go speak to some financial person at uni, theres normally things they can do to help.
And if you actually cant stop drinking using self motivation then see a doctor about the alcohol problem, if not it will end up making you physically ill and give you more things to be worried about.
you'd be the exception then
but it is a very common thing.
Ive maxed out a 1500 overdraft!
spent all my student loans well before i was due for another one
I came to uni with a maxed out credit card at 600!
I spend most my time in debt, with no money. I should have my old job back soon enough so, I'll be able to sort my broke ass out!
It is a very common thing, yes, but im not an exception. All of my friends at uni were the same as me- poor, but we had the sense to not get ourselves into un-necessary debt.
University is a learning process, especially when it comes to budgeting. The people with the most money sense leave uni with the least debt. Some people that lived on my floor in the first year (not my friends) would blow almost their entire loans on fancy brand clothing, then have a hissy fit because they had no money left for food or rent. Who's fault is that then!
I dont know about that... I, like my uni freinds & friend from home who went to uni obviously drank a lot when we were out & partying, but I dont know anyone for whom this turned into a problem with alcohol. the one person I know who I went to school with and is now an alcoholic didnt go to uni / college.