what to do when you for sm reason are not in the mood?

Former Member

I dont actually know if i wasnt in the mood, but yesterday...me and my boyfriend were on the phone (he has been on a trip for about 3 weeks for a club that he is in)...and he was getting all dirty and stuff and i could tell he was in the mood...but idk..i wasnt. Personally i think maybe after he said:

"i want you to say my name while moaning (wtf? )"

sorta put me off...cause he was expecting me to do smthing and i was trying to do that...idk...but our phone call was short last night cause his supervisor was in the hall way so he couldnt stay long..but i could also tell he was sorta frustrated by me...what do u do when your sorta.."not in the mood" ?

Former Member

Only time I've never not been in the mood is when I'm not happy with the partner I was with and usually dump them soon anyway.
Because I have a high sex drive, I know what it's like to be knocked back. Personally I'd go along with it for their sake.

Former Member

VinylVicky wrote: »

Only time I've never not been in the mood is when I'm not happy with the partner I was with and usually dump them soon anyway.
Because I have a high sex drive, I know what it's like to be knocked back. Personally I'd go along with it for their sake.

yeah thing is...i sorta was in the mood too...but then again...like i sorta sounded mad at him and i have no clue why. it sounded as if i was not in the mood and i was mad at him??

Former Member

maybe you were uncomfortable in the situation and wasn't sure what to say etc?

Former Member

Perhaps it was the situation that was making you uncomfortable?

If my bloke called me and wantd to talk dirty but I was in the middle of the washing up or having a cup of tea round mum's house then I wouldn't really feel in the mood either. So perhaps where you were and what you were doing at the time had something to do with it?

Former Member

BumbleBee wrote: »

Perhaps it was the situation that was making you uncomfortable?

If my bloke called me and wantd to talk dirty but I was in the middle of the washing up or having a cup of tea round mum's house then I wouldn't really feel in the mood either. So perhaps where you were and what you were doing at the time had something to do with it?

...i was in my room...just lying down in bed cause it was 12am when he called....so i wasnt busy or anything...and i was in the mood..but then again...i wasnt...it was as if smthing was holding me back?

Former Member

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Former Member

Dobbin wrote: »

Have you done the whole phone sex thing before? It can be weird at first. Me and my ex got quite good at it (he was at uni so I didnt see him much) but it takes a while to relax. And everyone has their down days when they don't really feel in the mood, I wouldn't worry too much

haha him and i have done that before...so when he started talking dirty i knew what it was gonna lead to...and we were actually comfortable then..but for some reason...last night it was uncomfortable...and i cant really blame him cause he was trying really hard to get me in "the mood" but i wasnt for some strange reason.

Former Member

As I said hunni, it's completely normal to not be in the mood all the time. Best thing I find is to forget about it- because when you try to get into the mood, it becomes a bit too forced and in my opinion doesnt feel right.

Former Member

perhaps you'd had a long and tiring day and just wanted to go to sleep?

No need to read anything into it in my opinion.

Former Member

BumbleBee wrote: »

perhaps you'd had a long and tiring day and just wanted to go to sleep?

No need to read anything into it in my opinion.

yeah i wasnt tired but maybe...i just hope that he wasnt frustrated with me...he texted me after he hung up saying "sorry supervisor came in...well i guess i better get some sleep. good night." and i am not gonna read into that. but hopefully he will see it as maybe just one night i was not in the mood...