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saying "I love you"
Former Member
Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
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I dont think there is a required amount of time. If they say it on the second date then of course I would be wary but it's all subjective. If someone said it to me and I didn't feel that way (yet) then I would be flattered but I wouldn't say it back unless I meant it. Recently took the big step and luckily he felt the same way. It's a very scary thing to do.
I have said it and meant it to two people, three if you count the time I thought I was in love but actually wasn't. I have said it to a total of...erm...6 people. I think. Maybe more, I don't know. Definitely 6 though.
The first time I said it I was drunk and I blurted it out in front of everyone in a chinese takeaway
If you don't feel the same then you shouldn't say it back. You should just say "well I don't feel like I'm there yet but I do have strong feelings for you" or something.
I've said it to four or so people properly, thought I've meant it at the time but it was probably just puppy love or something.
A guy said it to me once and I didnt know what to say so I opted to say "awwww". Not the best thing to say really.
Hahahahha
I never said it in my first proper relationship even though he said it to me. I was terrified of saying it. I don't know if he actually meant it though looking back at how our relationship ended up. I think he said it to get me into bed after we had been together for a good few months :grump:
For me to say "I love you" is a really big deal. I always mean it too. I think its really unfair for people to say "I love you" when they don't actually mean it, whatever the circumstances.
I never say it first either, I'm silly like that. I'm always afraid the other person won't feel the same way and I'll scare them off.
I don't think theres a definate time to say whether you love someone or not. You should just say it when you feel the time is right.
I'm pretty sure we would have said it for the first time (soberly) not long after though, if we hadn't gained our confidence from about 6 litres of Strongbow each :yuck: (I still can't drink it)
I think it's all depending on how open a person you are, though I'd never say it if I didn't mean it. My first boyfriend said it to me about a week before he broke up with me (so obviously THAT was a load of crap!) and I'm glad I didn't say it back.
But i have said it to one girl where i was in love with them and meant it that way.
There is no time limit, it is just how you feel, sometimes one will fall in love and the other won't or will take longer to realise it.
I had a Dutch beau last year who used to say "I love you" all the time in his native speak -- thinking I wouldn't know what it meant. I think I largely ignored it/pretended I didn't hear him, or said thanks
My boyfriend now said it to me before i said it to him, but i told him i wasnt going to say it till i was sure.
You should just say it when it feels right.
Same.
Same here... luckily I found the right time to say it back to him and we are getting married next Saturday
i don't think i'm really a quick to fall in love kinda person. with my ex we'd been going out a few weeks and i thought i did but something he said to me about one of his exes made me wake up and realise i didn't (not in a nasty way!) - it was just all sorts of feelings going around in my head and i was really happy etc.
With my current girlfriend I held off until she said it, which was at around 8 months. This impressed me even more since I was her first boyfriend. That was two years ago and I don't think she nor I meant it when we said it back then, but I certainly mean it when I tell her now.
So she's the only person I've been with, said it to and really felt and meant it.