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Hwo do I tell them I'm not interested?

BillieTheBotBillieTheBot Posts: 8,721 Bot
in Sex & Relationships
There's a few girls on the same course as me. When we do our work, we usually talk about random stuff not related to what we're working on. For a while now, one of them has been basically planning my brithday! The thing is, I don't drink like they do (as in, go out most weekends and basically get pissed) because it's not something I enjoy.

Now, how do I tell them that going out and getting pissed isn't something I really like doing? They already know I rarely drink, yet they're still planning on taking me out.:confused:
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    just tell them that you're doing something else?
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Never though of that, thanks!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Sofie wrote: »
    Now, how do I tell them that going out and getting pissed isn't something I really like doing?

    Do just that. You can compromise - plenty of places do non-alcoholic cocktails, f'rinstance. Be flattered that they care about you enough to organise stuff for your birthday! I think that's lovely...
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Yeah- on the other hand it's also possible to go out and not drink. do you not like the party atmosphere either?
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    It's more of a 'I don't get what's so good about getting pissed'. I mean, I have fun whilst out and not drinking. I also son't like tha tmosphere much either.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Ah sorry, i misread! where you've said you dont drink like they do i read it as you don't drink. Well yes, if you don't think you're going to enjoy it, tell them that unfortunately you've got other plans. how long have they been planning it for? as long as it's not too long, it'd still be ok for you to say oh im sorry just found out someone's been planning a surprise for me... or something like that. but beware that they might be hurt if they found out that you did something entirely different to what excuse you gave them.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    They've only been planning it since just before Christmas I think.
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    Indrid ColdIndrid Cold Posts: 16,688 Skive's The Limit
    Sofie wrote: »
    They've only been planning it since just before Christmas I think.
    ...ONLY? That's not "only", that's a long time already.

    Did you not know until fairly recently (as in, last week or so)? If you knew it from the beginning you should have told them you're not interested right away.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I've known since the start but never actually took any notice of it. And they know I don't drink that often or anything like that so I don't understand why they're even thinking about doing stuff like this.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Sofie wrote: »
    I've known since the start but never actually took any notice of it. And they know I don't drink that often or anything like that so I don't understand why they're even thinking about doing stuff like this.
    Probably because they want to take you out and get you pissed!
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    I don't see the point in going out and getting pissed and the nightlife isn't my scene. Personally, I'd go out with them. It's your birthday and you don't have to drink. I think you could still have a good time. They might be a bit offended if you say no and take it personally. I think it'd make your time at college more bearable if you erm..'bonded'. Lol..I don't know. My point isn't all that good.
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    well it's sweet of your friends to organize something for your birthday!!..but the 'whats so good abt drinking?' part i can totally understand....i dont like to drink much either, but my friends understand that...why dont u suggest soemthing that doesnt involve a club for your birthday...tell them abt something u havent tried (ice skating maybe...?) n suggest that all of u go for it together before a girlie movie night or soemthing....hope this helps!:)
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    Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,323 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Sofie wrote: »
    There's a few girls on the same course as me. When we do our work, we usually talk about random stuff not related to what we're working on. For a while now, one of them has been basically planning my brithday! The thing is, I don't drink like they do (as in, go out most weekends and basically get pissed) because it's not something I enjoy.

    Now, how do I tell them that going out and getting pissed isn't something I really like doing? They already know I rarely drink, yet they're still planning on taking me out.:confused:

    Just be open and honest, and do it quick! Tell them that you really appreciate the thought, but you'd feel more comfortable doing something else. If you want to party with them on your birthday, include them. If not, let them know you'll be spending an evening by yourself. Say it's a tradition or something and you meditate on your birthday. :D It'll be far worse if you let them plan it and you go out with them and things get ugly. After a few drinks, you might just let all that resentment out in a most profound way. I'm not speaking from experience or anything here... well okay maybe I am! My mates always wanted to take me to strip establishments on my birthday and I'm really not into that. One night after a bottle or two I told them how I felt and got really upset and ended up losing some very close mates of mine. Don't make my mistake.
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