Really confused, help!

Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
Hey everyone, I think I just need to vent a bit about how I'm feeling.

See, it's been my wish to go to Europe and do some studying, ideally a Masters degree since I already have an undergraduate degree (psychology).

I've been moaning about it for more than 2 years, but only took the decision to apply for unis last october, since I really hadn't made up my mind about what area exaclty I wanted to specialise in. After many many weeks of internet search of what was available and considerings of my future career, it soon became clear to me that what I really wanted to do was to work as a children's public/social policy maker. It wasn't very clear though which courses exactly would lead me there; I considered doing something to specialise more on children (like developmental psychology) and/or a course directly on public policy (but which probably didn't have much to do with children's policies specifically). It was in these consideration when I came across the perfect course for me: a MSc in Childhood Studies. It genuinely is everything I ever dreamed of studying: childhood looked at from all perspectives: legal, social, psychological, health, etc. So I applied for this course in two universities where I found it: at London and at Edinburgh uni. Along with these I also applied for a scholarship because overseas fees are really :crazyeyes :crazyeyes :crazyeyes to say the least. Add to that the cost of living and it makes it even worse. Plus coming from Latin America the costs of living in the UK are really out of reach.

So, considering the scholarship for the UK is really competitive, I also applied for a scholarship for France so I wouldn't be left with nothing if the UK option didn't work out. Sadly though, there wasn't an equivalent of the Childhood studies masters, not even a decent social policy course, so I went with the next best option: developmental psychology. It made sense to apply for that since the French are the leaders really in that area, but tbh the course doesn't really drive me crazy.

In the meantime, with every passing day my desire to do the childhood studies course grew immensely, every day I was more convinced that that was the best possible course for me, it became my dream - much more than going to France for the other course. I even started buying lottery tickets to be able to afford the course in case I didn't win the scholarship, I was that desperate. :o

So - what happened? I didn't win the scholarship for the UK :( , but I did win it for France :yippe: . I found out about both results around the same time this month, so I was gutted but chuffed pretty much simultaneously. It was a very wierd feeling, and people around me have been like, why aren't you over the moon with joy? You're going to Paris for a year to study for Christ's sake! And yeah, they are right... but still, my dream had just been crushed too. However, after a few days passed I have been able to start assuming that I wouldn't be going to the UK and become much more excited about France... until today, when I received my offer of admission letter for Edinburgh :( - it just hurts so much to not be able to take the place because of money :crying:. The alternative I have is to ask for a loan (which aren't difficult to get), but the price is so high I could easily be paying back the loan for another 10 years after I come back (or more). With the same money I could even buy a small flat, so it seems kind of silly to use all that money on only one year of my life. However - I know of other people who have just gone for it, and have managed to find some funding here and there.

I don't know, a part of me feels like I deserve to be slapped at - but then I am the sort of person who thinks you should go after your dreams no matter what. And I am really really passionate about children and my career... all this business means a lot to me.

So, what does everyone make of all this situation? Any input will be appreciated, I think I just need some outside perspective - thanks.

Comments

  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Hiya Bluewisdom,

    Congratulations for obtaining the French scholarship- you should be really proud! It seems like you are disappointed because the UK was your first choice but you have a wonderful opportunity with the French scholarship. If you look on the bright side, you could have got none of the scholarships and your dream of studying abroad wouldn't be possible this year but you have the chance to go elsewhere and I'm sure it will be a great experience.

    Hope you feel more cheerful soon. :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Oh gosh, how gutting not to get the UK scholarship :( :( Like you say though, they are very competitive, and the fact that you won the one for France is something to be proud of - don't let the fact that you didn't win the UK one shake your faith in your ability or anything.

    My take on it is, I would only settle for France if you think doing the course would make you happy, rather than accepting it as second best. You don't want to spend a year of your life working really hard on something you don't much care about, when you've got the chance to do something you really do care about. You don't want to regret not paying the money to do something you are obviously really enthused about. On the other hand, you don't want to regret paying the money when you could have studied in France for free, because as you say, it is a lot of money. Do you think you would still enjoy the French course, or are you just doing it because it's well-renowned and vaguely connected to what you're interested in?

    One option you could maybe consider is to do a part-time Masters over two years while you work part-time as well, to help cover the course costs. That way you'd also get to experience another two years of living in Europe instead of just one. Of course you've got the issue of getting a work permit, I don't know how much hassle that would be for you, but it's something to look into at least.

    My final thought for you is to think carefully about what the Masters is going to get you. Will the UK Masters get you closer to your ideal job than the French one? If so, the money isn't just being spent on one year of your life, but will be spread out over the forseeable future. However, if the French Masters would be just as beneficial to a future job in the area you want to go into, the money really will just go towards making sure you have a great year, but after that you'll have the debt to catch up and no further benefits.

    Hope that helped a bit :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Congratulations!!!!! Thats wonderful
    its so easy to get from Paris to the UK for so cheap too, you could easily spend lots of time in the UK if you wanted, although I can see why its also mixed feelings and some disappointment for not getting your first choice, its still wonderful that youve got a scholarship for France.
    All the best with it :) :heart:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Think of it as an opportunity! How many people get to live in France for a year??
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    around 60 million i think
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    muse- wrote: »
    around 60 million i think

    :lol:
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thanks everyone for your replies, I appreciate it very much. :heart:

    And wildchild, you raise some excellent points that I need to think about and consider. The option of doing the Masters degree on a part-time basis whilst working is an excellent one, although sadly it isn't possible because they don't give you a student's visa for part-time courses. That means I'd have to get the job first (and work permit) which is kind of difficult from here.

    Anyhow you've risen some excellent points I need to consider carefully, as I said before. Thanks a lot. :)
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Just wondering- if the French course is only one year...is there any reason why you couldn't take the scholarship and study the Masters course in France for this year and reapply for the UK next year? Did you apply for an Alban scholarship? I seem to come across that name all the time when searching for myself. You obviously have the grades to be accepted to a British University as you got a place at Edinburgh already so that woudn't be a problem, you'd just need to apply for every type of scholarship you could possibly find.

    Good luck and hope you're feeling a bit more positive about things.
  • Former MemberFormer Member Posts: 1,876,329 The Mix Honorary Guru
    Thanks silverhalo! As it turns out, that's exactly what I'm going to do :)
    I'm going to take up the scholarship to Paris and enjoy it and then next year (or the one after, but definitely SOMETIME) I'll reapply to the UK and to the scholarships. Maybe if I get good results in my French Masters I'll even have a better chance of winning the scholarship for the UK.

    And SCC, I'll definitely be going to the UK to visit! Before this year is over I'll be in London at least, that's for sure! :hyper:
  • Indrid ColdIndrid Cold Warming up? Posts: 16,688
    Good luck! :)
Sign In or Register to comment.